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Elliot of House Elefant, the First of his Name - Fantasora

Elliot of House Elefant, the First of his Name

Berkeley Optometry GoT S2

Owner: nyan

5-5, 268 pts
Points Z-Score: -0.01 (percentile: 49.61%)
Weeks at #1: 0
Categories won: Insults Delivered / Funny Lines (102), Political Wins (57)
Best Week: Episode 9: Blackwater (+41 points)
Team MVP: Tyrion Lannister (picked #2, 144 points, 53.73% of team total)
Longest winstreak: W-3

Roster Stats

Character Drafted Total Kills Insults Intercourse Wine Politics Deaths Special Warm/Fuzzy
The third child of Tywin Lannister. Under his father's orders, he travels to King's Landing to serve as Hand of the King for Joffrey.
#2 144 2 66 5 35 30 0 6 0
Joffrey Baratheon is the recently coronated King of the Seven Kingdoms. He's kind of a dick.
#11 47 5 12 0 0 6 0 24 0
The head of House Lannister, he is wealthy, cunning, and ruthless. He is the father of Cersei, Jaime, and Tyrion Lannister.
#14 37 0 9 0 10 18 0 0 0
A member of the Thirteen who rule over the great city of Qarth. The Spice King is a powerful merchant, and one of the more outspoken members of the Thirteen.
#35 16 0 3 0 0 0 13 0 0
A member of the Night's Watch.
#38 9 0 9 0 0 0 0 0 0
The youngest of the Stark children.
#23 6 0 0 0 0 0 0 6 0
An orphan from King's Landing, he joins a group of Night's Watch recruits led by Yoren.
#26 3 0 0 0 0 0 0 3 0
A ranger of the Night's Watch. He is a part of Jon Snow's close circle of friends, and joins the Great Ranging north of the Wall.
#50 6 0 3 0 0 3 0 0 0
Arya's swordfighting teacher. He is a master swordfighter, and a former First Sword of Braavos. His whereabouts are unknown after he helps Arya escape capture by Lannister soldiers.
#47 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0
The young, sickly son of Jon Arryn and Lysa Tully. He is Lord of the Vale, although his mother rules until he comes of age.
#59 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0
Totals 268 7 102 5 45 57 13 39 0

Roster

charId Character Special
17
The third child of Tywin Lannister. Under his father's orders, he travels to King's Landing to serve as Hand of the King for Joffrey.
+1 point each time he is denied a drink
+1 point whenever he physically gives someone a coin (or other legal tender)
21
Joffrey Baratheon is the recently coronated King of the Seven Kingdoms. He's kind of a dick.
+1 point for each slap received.
+1 point for each verbal slap received.
20
The head of House Lannister, he is wealthy, cunning, and ruthless. He is the father of Cersei, Jaime, and Tyrion Lannister.
+1 politics point for each lecture he gives to a member of his family.
2x multiplier for insults delivered to his children.
8
The youngest of the Stark children.
+1 point for every scene where he has a speaking line
Shaggydog's actions contribute to his points.
104
An orphan from King's Landing, he joins a group of Night's Watch recruits led by Yoren.
+1 point for every baked good or other food he prepares
165
A member of the Thirteen who rule over the great city of Qarth. The Spice King is a powerful merchant, and one of the more outspoken members of the Thirteen.
45
A member of the Night's Watch.
73
Arya's swordfighting teacher. He is a master swordfighter, and a former First Sword of Braavos. His whereabouts are unknown after he helps Arya escape capture by Lannister soldiers.
+1 point every time he references the "God of Death".
44
A ranger of the Night's Watch. He is a part of Jon Snow's close circle of friends, and joins the Great Ranging north of the Wall.
84
The young, sickly son of Jon Arryn and Lysa Tully. He is Lord of the Vale, although his mother rules until he comes of age.
Gains points in the the Wine category for breastfeeding.
+1 point when he mentions making something "fly".
Kills
Episode 4: Garden of Bones
15:46 (+5) Joffrey Baratheon:
Joffrey orders Ros to torture Daisy with an antlered sceptre. (Major Injury of Named Character)
Episode 9: Blackwater
50:00 (+2) Tyrion Lannister:
Tyrion hacks off a soldier's foot and kills him with his axe. (Kill of Unnamed Character)
Insults Delivered / Funny Lines
Episode 1: The North Remembers
12:01 (+3) Tyrion Lannister:
to Cersei: "You love your children. It's your one redeeming quality. That and your cheekbones." (Funny Line)
21:11 (+3) Grenn:
Sam: "Nothing's killed me yet."
Grenn: "Your ass killed the sledge."
(Witty Insult)
Episode 2: The Night Lands
10:00 (+3) Tyrion Lannister:
after Cersei tears up Robb Stark's peace terms: "You've perfected the art of tearing up papers." (Witty Insult)
27:35 (+3) Tyrion Lannister:
to Janos Slynt: "I'm not questioning your honor, Lord Janos. I'm denying its existence." (Witty Insult)
46:19 (+3) Tyrion Lannister:
Cersei: "You've never taken it seriously! You haven't, Jaime hasn't! ... it's all fallen on me."
Tyrion: "As has Jaime, repeatedly, according to Stannis Baratheon."
(Witty Insult)
Episode 3: What Is Dead May Never Die
40:28 (+3) Tyrion Lannister:
to Grand Maester Pycelle: "Cut off his manhood and feed it to the goats." (Threat)
Episode 4: Garden of Bones
10:34 (+3) Joffrey Baratheon:
Ordering Ser Meryn to beat Sansa: "Leave her face... I like her pretty." (Threat)
11:40 (+3) Tyrion Lannister:
Ser Meryn Trant: "No one threatens His Grace in the presence of the Kingsguard."
Tyrion: "I'm not threatening the King, Ser. I am educating my nephew. Bronn, the next time Ser Meryn speaks, kill him. That was a threat. See the difference?"
(Threat)
Episode 5: The Ghost of Harrenhal
10:26 (+3) Tyrion Lannister:
to Cersei: "Myrcella is a sweet, innocent girl and I don't blame her at all for you." (Witty Insult)
10:31 (+3) Tyrion Lannister:
Cersei: "Aren't you always so clever with your schemes and your plots?"
Tyrion: "Schemes and plots are the same thing."
(Funny Line)
11:41 (+3) Tyrion Lannister:
to Lancel: "Tell me, if the vile allegations against my brother and sister are true, do you think it will make Jaime more likely to kill you or less likely? When I tell him you're fucking her, I mean." (Threat)
12:23 (+3) Tyrion Lannister:
Lancel: "I swear to you."
Tyrion: "Swear to me on what?"
Lancel: "On my life."
Tyrion: "But I don't care about your life."
(Funny Line)
16:10 (+3) Tyrion Lannister:
Bronn: "What about your father?"
Tyrion: "He hasn't sent a raven in weeks. He's very busy. Being repeatedly humiliated by Robb Stark is time-consuming."
(Witty Insult)
21:58 (+3) Tywin Lannister:
Reginald Lannister: "We've worked through the night, My Lord. Perhaps we'd profit from some sleep."
Tywin: "As I think you would, Reginald. And because you're my cousin, I might even let you wake from that sleep."
(Threat)
28:16 (+3) Eddison Tollett:
Samwell: "Think of how old this place is ... before the Targaryens defeated the Hendals, before the Andals took Westeros from the First Men-"
Edd: "Before I die, please, stop talking."
(Funny Line)
28:33 (+3) Eddison Tollett:
Samwell: "Thousands and thousands of years ago, the First Men stood here where we're standing all through the long night. What do you think they were like, the First Men?"
Edd: "Stupid. Smart people don't find themselves in places like this."
(Funny Line)
Episode 6: The Old Gods and the New
17:14 (+3) Tywin Lannister:
Littlefinger: "It is my belief that a moment of chaos affords opportunities lost soon after."
Tywin: "You say that as if you were the first man alive to think it. Yes, a crisis is an opportunity. What other brilliant insights have you brought me today?"
(Witty Insult)
26:24 (+3) Joffrey Baratheon:
to his younger brother Tommen, as their sister Myrcella is shipped off to Dorne: "You sound like a little cat mewling for his mother. Princes don't cry." (Witty Insult)
26:28 (+3) Joffrey Baratheon:
Sansa: "My little brother cried when I left Winterfell."
Joffrey: "So?"
Sansa: "It seems a normal thing."
Joffrey: "Is your little brother a prince?"
Sansa: "No."
Joffrey: "Not really relevant, then, is it?"
(Witty Insult)
29:21 (+3) Tyrion Lannister:
"We've had vicious kings and we've had idiot kings, but I don't know if we've ever been cursed with a vicious idiot for a king!" (Witty Insult)
29:37 (+3) Tyrion Lannister:
Joffrey: "YOU'RE TALKING TO A KING!!!"
Tyrion: [SLAPS Joffrey] "...and now I've struck a King. Did my hand fall from my wrist?"
(Witty Insult)
32:45 (+3) Spice King of Qarth:
Xaro Xhoan Daxos: "Very true, and yet they say that your grandfather, who sold pepper off the back of a wagon, married a lady far lovelier and higher born than himself."
Spice King: "Every lady alive was lovelier and higher born than my grandfather."
(Comeback)
Episode 8: The Prince of Winterfell
17:41 (+3) Tywin Lannister:
to Arya: "See that he (Gregor Clegane) doesn't get drunk in the evenings. He's poor company when he's sober, but he's better at his work." (Witty Insult)
30:01 (+3) Tyrion Lannister:
Cersei: "Do you know why Varys is so dangerous? ... Because he doesn't have a cock."
Tyrion: "Neither do you."
(Witty Insult)
30:45 (+3) Tyrion Lannister:
Cersei: "...because I have your little whore."
Tyrion: "I thought you preferred blondes."
(Funny Line)
33:39 (+3) Tyrion Lannister:
to Cersei: "I will hurt you for this. A day will come when you think you're safe and happy and your joy will turn to ashes in your mouth. And you will know the debt is paid." (Threat)
47:21 (+3) Joffrey Baratheon:
"They say Stannis never smiles. I'll give him a red smile from ear to ear." (Threat)
47:21 (+3) Tyrion Lannister:
Joffrey: "They say Stannis never smiles. I'll give him a red smile from ear to ear."
Tyrion to Varys behind Joffrey's back: "Imagine Stannis' terror."
(Witty Insult)
49:03 (+3) Tyrion Lannister:
"The Lord of Light wants his enemies burned, the Drowned God wants them drowned. Why are all the Gods such vicious cunts? Where is the God of tits and wine?" (Funny Line)
Episode 9: Blackwater
7:35 (+3) Tyrion Lannister:
to Shae: "You can't fuck your way out of *everything*." (Witty Insult)
13:43 (+3) Tyrion Lannister:
Varys: "I've always hated the bells. They ring for horror... a dead king, a city under siege."
Tyrion: "...a wedding."
(Funny Line)
21:17 (+3) Tyrion Lannister:
Joffrey: "If I tell the Hound to cut you in half, he'll do it without a second thought."
Tyrion: "That would make me the Quarterman. It just doesn't have the same ring to it."
(Funny Line)
41:15 (+3) Tyrion Lannister:
to the Hound after he retreats from the battle and takes a wine break: "Can I get you some iced milk and a nice bowl of raspberries, too?" (Witty Insult)
Episode 10: Valar Morghulis
61:04 (+3) Eddison Tollett:
after Sam drones on about Gilly: "The thing about Gilly that you find so interesting is that she said six words to you." (Witty Insult)
Acts of Intercourse
Episode 9: Blackwater
8:04 (+5) Tyrion Lannister:
Sex with Shae on the eve of the battle.
Tyrion: "I'm a Lannister. I don't have a choice in all this. But it's not your war."
Shae: "It is now."
(Act of Intercourse)
Glasses of Wine Consumed
Episode 1: The North Remembers
7:57 (+5) Tyrion Lannister:
Tyrion drinks after making his entrance at Joffrey's nameday celebration. (Glass of Wine Consumed)
10:28 (+5) Tyrion Lannister:
Tyrion pours himself a glass of wine upon arrival at the Small Council meeting. (Glass of Wine Consumed)
Episode 2: The Night Lands
8:25 (+5) Tyrion Lannister:
Drinks during a meeting with Varys and Shae. (Glass of Wine Consumed)
26:06 (+5) Tyrion Lannister:
Tyrion drinks during the meeting with Janos Slynt. (Glass of Wine Consumed)
Episode 3: What Is Dead May Never Die
29:17 (+5) Tyrion Lannister:
Tyrion drinks while convincing Petyr Baelish to broker an agreement to marry off Myrcella Baratheon to Robin Arryn, the heir to the Vale. (Glass of Wine Consumed)
42:08 (+5) Tyrion Lannister:
drinks wine while chatting with Varys. (Glass of Wine Consumed)
Episode 6: The Old Gods and the New
17:50 (+5) Tywin Lannister:
Tywin drinks during a meeting with Littlefinger in Harrenhal. (Glass of Wine Consumed)
Episode 7: A Man Without Honor
14:28 (+5) Tywin Lannister:
Tywin drinks while telling Arya the history of Harrenhal. (Glass of Wine Consumed)
Episode 8: The Prince of Winterfell
30:24 (+5) Tyrion Lannister:
Tyrion sips from his glass while talking with Cersei after dinner. (Glass of Wine Consumed)
Political Wins
Episode 2: The Night Lands
28:19 (+3) Tyrion Lannister:
Tyrion strips Janos Slynt of his titles and exiles him to the Night's Watch. "There's a ship leaving for Eastwatch-by-the-Sea tonight. From there I'm afraid it's rather a long walk to Castle Black." (Politics (to be categorized))
Episode 3: What Is Dead May Never Die
41:21 (+3) Tyrion Lannister:
Tyrion orders Grand Maester Pycelle to be thrown into the dungeons of King's Landing. (Politics (to be categorized))
Episode 4: Garden of Bones
11:07 (+3) Tyrion Lannister:
Tyrion interrupts the court and stops Joffrey's public beating of Sansa Stark. (Politics (to be categorized))
16:14 (+3) Joffrey Baratheon:
Joffrey forcibly orders Ros to continue torturing Daisy.
Ros: "Your Grace, if your uncle finds out..."
Joffrey: "Oh, I want him to find out. You will bring her to his chambers when you're finished and show him what you've done. Or the same thing will happen to you."
(Politics (to be categorized))
40:55 (+3) Tywin Lannister:
Tywin orders the Harrenhal prisoners to be put to work instead of being tortured. "Are we so well-manned that we can afford to discard able young bodies and skilled laborers?" (Politics (to be categorized))
41:20 (+3) Tywin Lannister:
Discerns that Arya's a girl.
Polliver: "Kneel or I'll carve your lungs out, boy."
Tywin: "You'll do no such thing. This one's a girl, you idiot, dressed as a boy."
(Politics (to be categorized))
41:44 (+3) Tywin Lannister:
Tywin claims Arya as his cupbearer. (Politics (to be categorized))
43:15 (+3) Tyrion Lannister:
Tyrion exposes Lancel Lannister's incest with Cersei.
Lancel: "Your own father, Lord Tywin, when I was named the King's squire, he told me to obey her in everything."
Tyrion: "Did he tell you to fuck her, too?"
(Politics (to be categorized))
44:08 (+3) Tyrion Lannister:
Tyrion gains Lancel as a follower after blackmailing him with his knowledge of his affair with Cersei. (Politics (to be categorized))
Episode 5: The Ghost of Harrenhal
11:20 (+3) Tyrion Lannister:
Tyrion discover's Cersei's wildfire plans through Lancel. (Politics (to be categorized))
32:37 (+3) Tyrion Lannister:
Tyrion recruits Halyne the Pyromancer: "You won't be making wildfire for my sister any longer. You'll be making it for me." (Politics (to be categorized))
Episode 7: A Man Without Honor
15:54 (+3) Tywin Lannister:
Tywin figures out that Arya is in fact a noble girl. "Girl... 'M'lord'. Lowborn girls say 'M'lord', not 'My Lord'." (Politics (to be categorized))
Episode 8: The Prince of Winterfell
25:59 (+3) Grenn:
Grenn and Sam find a cache of dragonglass at the fist of the First Men. (Politics (to be categorized))
Episode 9: Blackwater
18:55 (+3) Joffrey Baratheon:
Joffrey presents his new sword, Hearteater. (Politics (to be categorized))
28:00 (+3) Tyrion Lannister:
Tyrion wins the first phase of the Battle of the Blackwater, blowing out a huge portion of Stannis' fleet with a massive wildfire explosion. (Politics (to be categorized))
44:33 (+3) Tyrion Lannister:
Tyrion's speech rouses the troops after Joffrey abandoned them.
"They say I'm half a man. But what does that make the lot of you? The only way out is through the gates. And they're at the gates.

There's another way out. I'm going to show you. We'll come out behind them and fuck them in their asses.

Don't fight for your king and don't fight for his kingdoms. Don't fight for honor. Don't fight for glory. Don't fight for riches, because you won't get any. This is your city Stannis means to sack. That's your gate he's ramming. If he gets in, it will be your houses he burns, your gold he steals, your women he will rape.

Those are brave me knocking at our door. Let's go kill them!"
(Politics (to be categorized))
50:28 (+3) Tyrion Lannister:
Tyrion wins the third phase of the battle, successfully leading a counterattack by sneaking through the tunnels and flanking Stannis' forces, destroying his siege weapons. (Politics (to be categorized))
54:30 (+3) Tywin Lannister:
Tywin emerges at the last moment to claim the fourth and final phase of the battle, using his host of new Tyrell allies to rout Stannis' forces and rescue King's Landing. (Politics (to be categorized))
Episode 10: Valar Morghulis
5:47 (+3) Tywin Lannister:
Tywin is re-appointed to Hand of the King by Joffrey. (Politics (to be categorized))
Deaths
Episode 7: A Man Without Honor
44:30 (+10) Spice King of Qarth:
The Spice King is assassinated along with 10 other members of the Thirteen, during a coup by the Warlock Pyat Pree and Xaro Xhoan Daxos. (Death)
Episode 8: The Prince of Winterfell
+1 for Spice King of Qarth
Episode 9: Blackwater
+1 for Spice King of Qarth
Episode 10: Valar Morghulis
+1 for Spice King of Qarth
Special
Episode 1: The North Remembers
49:16 (+3) Joffrey Baratheon:
Joffrey gets slapped after confronting Cersei about Robert's infidelities. (Special)
Episode 3: What Is Dead May Never Die
41:30 (+3) Tyrion Lannister:
Tyrion pays the frightened Daisy after he interrupts her session with Maester Pycelle to arrest him. (Special)
41:42 (+3) Tyrion Lannister:
Tyrion adds a second coin to Daisy's payment after watching Maester Pycelle dragged off. (Special)
Episode 4: Garden of Bones
12:50 (+3) Joffrey Baratheon:
Bronn: "There's no cure for being a cunt." (Special)
Episode 6: The Old Gods and the New
27:30 (+3) Joffrey Baratheon:
Joffrey gets nailed with a chunk of manure right across the face. (Special)
29:21 (+3) Joffrey Baratheon:
Tyrion: "We've had vicious kings and we've had idiot kings, but I don't know if we've ever been cursed with a vicious idiot for a king!" (Special)
29:39 (+3) Joffrey Baratheon:
Joffrey: "YOU'RE TALKING TO A KING!!!"
Tyrion: [SLAPS Joffrey] "...and now I've struck a King. Did my hand fall from my wrist?"
(Special)
Episode 7: A Man Without Honor
6:23 (+3) Rickon Stark:
Osha: "A boy can't survive on walnuts."
Rickon: "I'm FINE."
(Special)
Episode 8: The Prince of Winterfell
18:37 (+3) Hot Pie:
"You need sour cherries to make it right. And the secret is you dry the stones, and then you break them with a mallet. That's where the real flavor is. You crush 'em up real fine. And then when you're finished, you sprinkle them over the piecrust." (Special)
29:25 (+3) Joffrey Baratheon:
Cersei: "[Joffrey's] place is not on the battlefield."
Tyrion: "It's not on the throne, either, sadly for all of us."
(Special)
Episode 9: Blackwater
41:42 (+3) Joffrey Baratheon:
Sandor Clegane: "Fuck the Kingsguard. Fuck the city. Fuck the King." (Special)
48:10 (+3) Joffrey Baratheon:
Sansa: "What about the King?"
Sandor: "He can die just fine on his own."
(Special)
Episode 10: Valar Morghulis
43:17 (+3) Rickon Stark:
Rickon's 2nd line of the season, after he and Bran encounter the wounded Maester Luwin.
Rickon: "We'll make you better."
(Special)