Fake Stark

Hillbillies

Owner: pollyluu

3-3, 34 roto pts (#6)
Z-Score: -1.031 (percentile: 15.13%)
Weeks at #1: 0
Categories won: Special (147)
Best Week: Episode 2: A Knight of the Seven Kingdoms (+4.5 roto points)
Team MVP: Wight Army (Extras) (picked #3, 271 points, 52.22% of team total)
Longest winstreak: W-3

Roster Stats

Character Drafted Total Kills Politics Insults Wine Sex Thrones Deaths Special Feels
#3 271 157 12 0 0 0 0 0 102 0
#14 157 40 3 27 15 5 3 0 42 22
#19 60 1 9 27 10 5 5 0 0 3
#30 25 0 0 6 5 0 1 5 3 5
#46 6 0 3 3 0 0 0 0 0 0
#62 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0
#35 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0
#51 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0
Totals 519 198 27 63 30 10 9 5 147 30

Roster

charId Character Special
397
* glowing blue eyes (each set) simply staring at human characters without taking action (e.g. not attacking/pursuing)
* scores battle victories if featured in on-screen action
67
* every mention of "killing Crows"
* every on-screen second he stares into Brienne's soul (rounded up)
23
+1 point when he gives expert critique/advice on fighting strategy
37
+1 point for each scene where she speaks Valyrian or translates.
13
+1 every time she transports Bran
68
+1 each time she talks about something new she has learned
104
+1 point for every baked good or other food he prepares
126
+1 point whenever he name-drops that the brothel "is Lord Petyr Baelish's establishment"
Kills
Episode 3: The Long Night
A wight leaps onto an Unsullied soldier as the undead crash into the Unsullied front line. (Kill of Unnamed Character)
An Unsullied soldier is knocked to the ground as he bleeds out over the snow. (Kill of Unnamed Character)
A wight severs the arm of an Unsullied soldier (Kill of Unnamed Character)
A wight rips apart the throat of an an Unsullied soldier with its bare hands (Kill of Unnamed Character)
A wight pushes a sword through the throat of an Unsullied soldier (Kill of Unnamed Character)
Wights gang tackle two Unsullied soldiers from the side (Kill of Unnamed Character)
Wights decapitate an Unsullied soldier as he lays injured on the ground (Kill of Unnamed Character)
A Vale soldier is run through by a wight, after valiantly bashing one to bits with his shield. (Kill of Unnamed Character)
The wights slash another Northern soldier in the throat. (Kill of Unnamed Character)
A wight eats the face of a chainmailed soldier on the ground. (Kill of Unnamed Character)
Tormund slashes a wight across the chest as Drogon rains down fire in teh background. (Kill of Unnamed Character)
Tormund knees a wight in the zombie balls as Drogon's fire rages around. (Kill of Unnamed Character)
A chainmail-clad wight pulls down a screaming Northern soldier. (Kill of Unnamed Character)
Tormund slashes two wights before the snowstorm overwhelms the battlefield. (Kill of Unnamed Character)
Wights tackle three Northern soldiers (Kill of Unnamed Character)
Tormund slashes three wights. (Kill of Unnamed Character)
A wight runs a sword through the back of Eddison Tollet moments after he rescues Samwell Tarly. (Kill of Named Character)
Tormund cuts down a wight while telling the troops to fall back, then brings his axe down at a wight that attacks his leg. (Kill of Unnamed Character)
A wight lunges onto a soldier as the Northern forces make their hasty retreat back to Winterfell. (Kill of Unnamed Character)
Tormund slashes a wight as his group makes a running retreat back to Winterfell (Kill of Unnamed Character)
A wight gets very stabby with a Northern soldier on the ground. (Kill of Unnamed Character)
Wights tackle the three Winterfell torch runners before they can make it to light the trenches. (Kill of Unnamed Character)
Tormund cuts down two wights. (Kill of Unnamed Character)
Tormund cuts down a wight as Melisandre works to light the trench on fire. (Kill of Unnamed Character)
Tormund finds something to stab in the mostly empty ribcage of a wight climbing over the wall. (Kill of Unnamed Character)
The wights begin to breach the defenses at the wall, knocking over one defender and lunging atop another screaming Northern soldier. (Kill of Unnamed Character)
The Wight Army overtakes the wall, mauling 4 of its defenders and forcing the heroes to make a retreat. (Kill of Unnamed Character)
The wights jump two more Northern soldiers, dragging one of them across the ramparts and down to the zombie mosh pit below. (Kill of Unnamed Character)
After overrunning the castle wall, the wights descend onto the courtyard, massacring the first group of Northern soldiers they encounter. (Kill of Unnamed Character)
A hero wight manages to cut down two Northern soldiers on its own. (Kill of Unnamed Character)
A wight corners a Norther soldier and stabs him repeatedly in the stomach. (Kill of Unnamed Character)
Wights begin overrunning the inner courtyard at Winterfell, tackling or slashing at 3 Northern soldiers. (Kill of Unnamed Character)
The wights run a Northern soldier off a sloping roof adjoining the Winterfell walls. (Kill of Unnamed Character)
A wight stabs a Northern soldier through the throat. (Kill of Unnamed Character)
Wights impale a Northern soldier onto the dragonglass-barbed Czech hedgehog, forming a safe platform for them to overrun the defense. (Kill of Unnamed Character)
Wights jump the courtyard and cut down two Mormont soldiers. (Kill of Unnamed Character)
Beric blocks the doorway for a few moments as the wights finish him off in one of the most intense TSA frisk checks of all time. (Kill of Named Character)
Tormund turns around to protect Gendry, kicking a wight off of their backs in the Winterfell courtyard. (Kill of Unnamed Character)
Tormund beheads a wight atop the castle walls. (Kill of Unnamed Character)
The wights break into the crypts, dragging a girl into the darkness of one of the vaults. (Kill of Unnamed Character)
A girl trips in the crypts and is dragged into the bokeh as the wights attack. (Kill of Unnamed Character)
An Iroborn is tackled by a wight in the Godswood. (Kill of Unnamed Character)
Taking advantage of a prolonged landing, the horde of wights descend on Drogon, stabbing him all over as he attempts to fly away. (Major Injury of Named Character)
Tormund flails wildly and kills two wights as he and Gendry battle atop a mountain of wights and bodies. (Kill of Unnamed Character)
A wight kills a Nothern soldier in the hallway moments before he is killed by Jon Snow. (Kill of Unnamed Character)
As the Ironborn make their last stand in the Godswood, the wights take them down one by one. (Kill of Unnamed Character)
The wight eats the faces off of two people as they flood the Winterfell crypts. (Kill of Unnamed Character)
Tormund cuts down a wight as he and Gendry fend off the horde atop a pile of bodies. (Kill of Unnamed Character)
The wights bash in a woman against a statue in the Winterfell crypts. (Kill of Unnamed Character)
A wight chases down a mother and her two children and nabs the slower one that is less important to her in the crypts of Winterfell. (Kill of Unnamed Character)
Tormund stabs down into the mound of wights. (Kill of Unnamed Character)
After facing an onslaught of wights converging on Daenerys, Jorah succumbs to his wounds, having successfully defended his Queen. (Kill of Named Character)
submitted by brendan.hamme (approved!)
End-of-battle tally: minor injuries to Jon Snow throughout the battle (Minor Injury of Named Character)
End-of-battle tally: minor injuries to Brienne of Tarth throughout the battle (Minor Injury of Named Character)
End-of-battle tally: minor injuries to Tormund Giantsbane throughout the battle (Minor Injury of Named Character)
End-of-battle tally: minor injuries to Sandor Clegane throughout the battle (Minor Injury of Named Character)
End-of-battle tally: minor injuries to Gendry throughout the battle (Minor Injury of Named Character)
End-of-battle tally: minor injuries to Podrick Payne throughout the battle (Minor Injury of Named Character)
End-of-battle tally: minor injuries to Grey Worm throughout the battle (Minor Injury of Named Character)
End-of-battle tally: minor injuries to Samwell Tarly throughout the battle (Minor Injury of Named Character)
Episode 4: The Last of the Starks
40:01 (+1) Bronn:
Bronn punches Tyrion square in the nose, rendering it bloody. "I've never hit a dwarf before, but say another word and I will belt you." (Minor Injury of Named Character)
Political Wins
Episode 1: Winterfell
24:47 (+3) Bronn:
Qyburn gifts Bronn the crossbow used by Tyrion to murder Tywin Lannister, as Bronn is sent on a mission to assassinate the Lannister brothers. (New Weapon)
Episode 2: A Knight of the Seven Kingdoms
25:00 (+3) Gilly:
Gilly convinces a young Northern girl to stay safe in the crypts during the upcoming battle.

Gilly: "I'm going to be in the crypt with my son, and I'd feel a lot better with you there to protect us."
Little Northern girl: "Alright, I'll defend the crypt then."
(Convincing Argument)
Episode 3: The Long Night
The Wight Army routs Jorah Mormont's cavalry charge with the Dothraki horde, winning the initial skirmish outside the walls of Winterfell. (Victorious Battle)
The Wight Army wins the second phase of the battle, pushing the Northern armies to retreat back within Winterfell and slaughtering almost all of the Unsullied defenders. (Victorious Battle)
The Army of the Dead wins the third phase of the battle, overrunning the Winterfall walls and reaching the interior of the castle. (Victorious Battle)
The Wight Army's numbers multiply as they add the dead Dothraki, Unsullied, and Northern armies to their ranks. (Acquire a New Castle/City/Army/Loot)
Episode 4: The Last of the Starks
Jon gives charge of Ghost to Tormund, to take him back to his natural habitat north of the Wall. (New Follower/Prisoner)
Episode 6: The Iron Throne
69:56 (+6) Bronn:
Bronn is revealed as Lord of Highgarden and Master of Coin at the Small Council meeting.

Tyrion: "Ser Bronn of the Blackwater, Lord of Highgarden, Lord Paramount of the Reach and Master of Coin, would you say the crown's debt to you has been paid?"
Bronn: "In full, my Lord Hand."
(New Title)
Insults Delivered / Funny Lines
Episode 1: Winterfell
24:47 (+3) Bronn:
as Qyburn gifts him the crossbow used by Tyrion to kill Tywin Lannister
Qyburn: "She (Cersei) has a keen sense of poetic justice."
Bronn: "That fucking family..."
(Funny Line)
Eddison Tollet: "Stay back, he's got blue eyes!"
Tormund: "I've always had blue eyes!!!"
(Funny Line)
Episode 2: A Knight of the Seven Kingdoms
"The big woman still here?" (Funny Line)
Tyrion: "Would you like a drink?"
Tormund: "Brought my own." [holds up horn of weird milk]
(Funny Line)
The telephone game of Westerosi epithets makes its way to Tormund.
to Jaime: "They call you Kingkiller."
(Funny Line)
Tormund tells the story of his name, Giantsbane.

"They call me Giantsbane. Want to know why?
I killed a giant when I was 10. Then I climbed right into bed with his wife.
When she woke up, you know what she did? Suckled me at her teat for three months.
Thought I was her baby. That's how I got so strong. Giant's milk."
(Funny Line)
to Brienne: "I'm no King, but if I were, I'd knight you ten times over." (Funny Line)
Episode 3: The Long Night
Missandei gives a Mean Girls deathstare to Sansa after Sansa throws some behind-the-back shade on Daenerys in the Winterfell crypts.

Sansa, to Tyrion: "It wouldn't work between us. ... The Dragon Queen. Your divided loyalties would become a problem."
Missandei: "Yes. Without the Dragon Queen, there'd be no problem at all. We'd all be dead already."
(Witty Insult)
Episode 4: The Last of the Starks
Tormund demands Jon finish off his horn of wine in front of a celebratory crowd at the Feast of Winterfell.

Tormund: "We have to celebrate our victory."
Jon: "Vomiting is not celebrating."
Tormund: "...yes, it is."
(Funny Line)
"Now, which one of you cowards shit in my pants?" (Funny Line)
39:22 (+3) Bronn:
Bronn comments after hearing of Jaime's relationship with Brienne.

"I knew you were fucking her. A pair of tall, blond toffs. Must be like looking in the mirror."
(Witty Insult)
39:52 (+3) Bronn:
Tyrion: "You're a knight, thanks to me."
Bronn: "Thanks to me. And that title's worth as much as a blond hair from your brother's ballsack."
(Witty Insult)
40:05 (+3) Bronn:
Tyrion: "You broke my nose!"
Bronn: "I did not break your nose."
Tyrion: "How do you know?"
Bronn: "Because I've been breaking noses since I was your size, and I know what it sounds like."
(Funny Line)
40:50 (+3) Bronn:
Tyrion: "May I speak?
Bronn: "Why not? Only death will shut you up."
(Witty Insult)
41:48 (+3) Bronn:
Jaime: "Highgarden will never belong to a cutthroat."
Bronn: "Who were your ancestors, the ones who made your family rich? Fancy lads in silk? They were fucking cutthroats.
That's how all the great houses started, isn't it? With a hard bastard who was good at killing people. Kill a few hundred people, they make you a lord. Kill a few thousand, they make you king. And then all your cocksucking grandsons can ruin the family with their cocksucking ways."
(Funny Line)
Jon: "Rhaegal needs to heal. He doesn't need me weighing him down."
Tormund: "You weigh as much as two fleas fucking."
(Witty Insult)
49:24 (+3) Gilly:
to Jon, as Samwell blathers on about how Gilly got pregnant: "I'm sure he knows how it happens, Sam." (Funny Line)
submitted by jmccreight (approved!)
Cersei: "If you have any last words, now is the time."
Missandei: "Dracarys."
(Threat)
Episode 6: The Iron Throne
70:30 (+3) Bronn:
Bronn: "The Master of Coin looks forward to helping the Master of Ships, but first he has to ensure we're not wasting coin, or soon there won't be no more coin."
Davos: "Any more."
Bronn: "You Master of Grammar now too?"
(Witty Insult)
70:48 (+3) Bronn:
Bronn: "Oh, speaking of builders, all the best brothels burned down. The Master of Coin is willing to fund reconstruction." (Funny Line)
71:00 (+3) Bronn:
Samwell: "...the Archmaester is less than enthusiastic about the salutary effects of brothels."
Bronn: "Well I imagine he isn't using them properly."
(Witty Insult)
Glasses of Wine Consumed
Episode 1: Winterfell
23:51 (+5) Bronn:
Bronn drinks a glass after being interrupted by Qyburn. (Glass of Wine Consumed)
Episode 2: A Knight of the Seven Kingdoms
Tormund shotguns his entire horn of "giants' milk" as it pours down all over his beard to the dismay of Davos and others. (Glass of Wine Consumed)
submitted by alicehanners (approved!)
Episode 4: The Last of the Starks
Missandei drinks her toast early as the crowd cheers on Gendry's promotion to non-bastard and Lord Barathon of Storm's End. (Glass of Wine Consumed)
Tormund glugs straight from the pitcher during the Feast of Winterfell. (Glass of Wine Consumed)
submitted by fenrojas (approved!)
Tormund drinks from his horn as the crowd toasts both Daenerys and Arya. (Glass of Wine Consumed)
41:49 (+5) Bronn:
Bronn has a sip from Tyrion's tasty beverage as he holds both of the Lannister brothers at bay with a crossbow. (Glass of Wine Consumed)
Acts of Intercourse
Episode 1: Winterfell
22:58 (+5) Bronn:
Bronn gets started with one of the trio of whores in his chambers, but is interrupted by Qyburn before he can complete the triple-bird score. (Act of Intercourse)
Episode 4: The Last of the Starks
After being spurned by Brienne, Tormund rebounds with a Northern girl who fancies him at the Feast of Winterfell.

Northern girl: " You can touch me. I'm not afraid of Wildlings."
Tormund: "Maybe you should be."
(Act of Intercourse)
A Game of Thrones
Episode 1: Winterfell
24:08 (+1) Bronn:
Bronn sits down to get dressed and put his boots on after Qyburn interrupts his session with Marei and the other whores. (Basic Seat)
Episode 2: A Knight of the Seven Kingdoms
Tormund sits down to regale the fireplace crew with the story of how he was named Giantsbane. (Basic Seat)
Tormund and the fireplace crew continue sitting. (Basic Seat)
Tormund is sitting as Davos declares "we're out of wine" to the fireplace crew. (Basic Seat)
Episode 4: The Last of the Starks
9:54 (+1) Missandei:
Missandei sits in a chair at the side table at the Feast of Winterfell. (Basic Seat)
39:37 (+1) Bronn:
Bronn takes a seat with his hostages as he negotiates with Tyrion and Jaime at crossbow-point. (Basic Seat)
Episode 6: The Iron Throne
67:40 (+1) Bronn:
Bronn is seated at the Small Council meeting as Tyrion reviews Archmaester Ebrose's historical tome, "A Song of Ice and Fire" (Basic Seat)
68:39 (+1) Bronn:
Bronn reseats himself after Bran arrives at the Small Council meeting. (Basic Seat)
69:49 (+1) Bronn:
Bronn reseats himself at the Small Council meeting after King Bran's departure. (Basic Seat)
Deaths
Episode 4: The Last of the Starks
Missandei is beheaded by the Mountain atop the ramparts at King's Landing, after delivering her final words - "Dracarys." (Death)
submitted by codyandrew77 (approved!)
Special
Episode 2: A Knight of the Seven Kingdoms
Tormund greets Jon with a bear tackle and calls him "My little Crow." (Special)
submitted by nyan (approved!)
Tormund gives the eye to Brienne during the battle planning meeting (3 seconds)

"We're all going to die... but at least we die together."
(Special)
Tormund stares at Brienne as he enters the fireplace room (6 cumulative seconds staring at Brienne). She stares back.
"It could be our last night in this world, you know?"
(Special)
Episode 3: The Long Night
The wight who killed Eddison Tollet stares back at Sam with its blue eyes, and Sam runs in terror (Special)
After Melisandre lights the trench, 18 wights stare back through the flames with their glowing blue eyes. (Special)
submitted by brendan.hamme (approved!)
A wight continues to stare at Arya with its blue eyes after being stabbed in the library. (Special)
The dead stare back at Jon as the Night King raises them back up. (Special)
Seven sets of blue eyes stare through the weirwood tree to watch as Theon makes his final spear charge against the Night King (Special)
Episode 4: The Last of the Starks
Tormund eagerly stares at Brienne as she excuses herself to take a piss. His 3-second gaze is unfortunately interrupted by Jaime. (Special)
submitted by conor_finlay (approved!)
Missandei speaks her last words in Valyrian.

Cersei: "If you have any last words, now is the time."
Missandei: "Dracarys."
(Special)
The Feels
Episode 1: Winterfell
Edd and Tormund Giantsbane stumble upon each other at the Last Hearth.

Edd: "Stand back, he's got blue eyes!"
Tormund: "I've always had blue eyes!!"
(Ridiculously Funny Moment)
Episode 2: A Knight of the Seven Kingdoms
Tormund bear tackles Jon Snow in the courtyard as the Beyond-the-Wall gang reunites in Winterfell. (Funny Line)
Grey Worm and Missandei make plans for summer vacation after the war is done.
Missandei: "My people are peaceful. We cannot protect ourselves."
Grey Worm: "My people are not peaceful. We will protect you."
(Warm Fuzzy Moment)
Tormund shotguns his entire horn of "giants' milk" as it pours down all over his beard to the dismay of Davos and others. (Ridiculously Funny Moment)
Episode 4: The Last of the Starks
Tormund continually splashes wine EVERYWHERE as he regales the crowd with the legend of Jon Snow. (Ridiculously Funny Moment)
Tormund's heart is broken as he regales his story to Clegane. "And after all that, this fucker comes north and takes her from me. Just takes her, like that. I mean it, Clegane. My heart is broken." (Sad Feels)
Jon and Tormund say their final farewells, as Tormund leaves to take the Free Folk home beyond the Wall.

Tormund: "It isn't home. We need room to wander. I'll take them back through Castle Black as soon as the winter storms pass. Back where we belong."
(Warm Fuzzy Moment)
Episode 6: The Iron Throne
67:15 (+3) Bronn:
Bronn drags one of Tyrion's carefully arranged Small Council chairs to the Hand's exasperation. (Ridiculously Funny Moment)