Matchup: Crows Before Hoes vs Hold this dick for Ep 4
PHARM
Political Wins
Gendry receives high marks on his peer reviews after the Battle of Winterfell, and he is legitimized as a non-bastard and named Lord Baratheon of Storm's End.
Daenerys Targaryen: "I think you should be Lord of Storm's End.
Gendry: "That can't be, I'm a bastard."
Daenerys: "No, you are Lord Gendry Baratheon of Storm's End. The lawful son of Robert Baratheon. Because that is what I have made you." (New Title)
Daenerys Targaryen: "I think you should be Lord of Storm's End.
Gendry: "That can't be, I'm a bastard."
Daenerys: "No, you are Lord Gendry Baratheon of Storm's End. The lawful son of Robert Baratheon. Because that is what I have made you." (New Title)
34:57
(+3)
Daenerys Targaryen:
Daenerys' pleas to Jon were effective, convincing him to take her side over the Stark family's in pledging the unconditional loyalty of the Northern troops.
(Convincing Argument)
50:36
(+3)
Tormund Giantsbane:
Jon gives charge of Ghost to Tormund, to take him back to his natural habitat north of the Wall.
(New Follower/Prisoner)
Varys learns of Jon's parentage through the game of secret discovery telephone.
Varys: "How many others know?"
Tyrion: "Including us? Eight."
Varys: "Well, then it's not a secret anymore. It's information." (Secret Discovery)
Varys: "How many others know?"
Tyrion: "Including us? Eight."
Varys: "Well, then it's not a secret anymore. It's information." (Secret Discovery)
59:07
(+3)
Daenerys Targaryen:
Daenerys ignores Varys' pleas and proceeds with her plan to take King's Landing by force.
Varys: "I beg you, Your Grace. Do not destroy the city you came to save. Do not become what you have always struggled to defeat."
Daenerys: "Do you believe we're here for a reason, Lord Varys? I'm here to free the world from tyrants. That is my destiny and I will serve it, no matter the cost." (Executive Decision)
Varys: "I beg you, Your Grace. Do not destroy the city you came to save. Do not become what you have always struggled to defeat."
Daenerys: "Do you believe we're here for a reason, Lord Varys? I'm here to free the world from tyrants. That is my destiny and I will serve it, no matter the cost." (Executive Decision)
Insults Delivered / Funny Lines
14:47
(+3)
Tormund Giantsbane:
Tormund demands Jon finish off his horn of wine in front of a celebratory crowd at the Feast of Winterfell.
Tormund: "We have to celebrate our victory."
Jon: "Vomiting is not celebrating."
Tormund: "...yes, it is." (Funny Line)
Tormund: "We have to celebrate our victory."
Jon: "Vomiting is not celebrating."
Tormund: "...yes, it is." (Funny Line)
15:42
(+3)
Jaime Lannister:
Jaime and Brienne play a drinking game of guesses.
Jaime: "You... are an only child."
Brienne: "I told you I was."
Jaime: "You didn't."
Brienne: "I did."
Jaime: "I surmised it." (Funny Line)
Jaime: "You... are an only child."
Brienne: "I told you I was."
Jaime: "You didn't."
Brienne: "I did."
Jaime: "I surmised it." (Funny Line)
25:24
(+3)
Jaime Lannister:
Brienne: "It's the first thing I learnt when I came to the North. Keep your fire going. Every time you leave the room, put more wood on."
Jaime: "... You know the first thing I learned in the North? I hate the fucking North." (Funny Line)
Jaime: "... You know the first thing I learned in the North? I hate the fucking North." (Funny Line)
31:40
(+3)
Daenerys Targaryen:
Daenerys demands subservience from Jon to keep his Targaryen identity from his family.
Jon: "You are my Queen. Nothing will change that. And they are my family. We can live together."
Daenerys: "We can. I've just told you how." (Threat)
Jon: "You are my Queen. Nothing will change that. And they are my family. We can live together."
Daenerys: "We can. I've just told you how." (Threat)
47:26
(+3)
Tormund Giantsbane:
Jon: "Rhaegal needs to heal. He doesn't need me weighing him down."
Tormund: "You weigh as much as two fleas fucking." (Witty Insult)
Tormund: "You weigh as much as two fleas fucking." (Witty Insult)
Glasses of Wine Consumed
Gendry takes a drink before asking the Hound if he's seen Arya.
(Glass of Wine Consumed)
9:52
(+5)
Jaime Lannister:
Jaime drinks as Gendry scoots past him and Brienne in the aisle.
(Glass of Wine Consumed)
11:40
(+5)
Daenerys Targaryen:
Daenerys drinks as the crowd celebrates Gendry's promotion to Lord Baratheon of Storm's End.
(Glass of Wine Consumed)
12:24
(+5)
Jaime Lannister:
Brienne and Jaime share a drink at the Feast of Winterfell.
Jaime: "We've fought dead things and lived to talk about it.If this isn't the time to drink, when is?" (Glass of Wine Consumed)
Jaime: "We've fought dead things and lived to talk about it.If this isn't the time to drink, when is?" (Glass of Wine Consumed)
12:31
(+5)
Tormund Giantsbane:
Tormund glugs straight from the pitcher during the Feast of Winterfell.
(Glass of Wine Consumed)
submitted by fenrojas (approved!)
13:31
(+5)
Davos Seaworth:
Davos is handed a cup by Tyrion as they worry about the mysteries of the Lord of Light and the political infighting situation.
(Glass of Wine Consumed)
15:02
(+5)
Tormund Giantsbane:
Tormund drinks from his horn as the crowd toasts both Daenerys and Arya.
(Glass of Wine Consumed)
16:25
(+5)
Davos Seaworth:
Davos drinks in the foreground as Tormund regales the crowd with the legends of Jon Snow.
(Glass of Wine Consumed)
25:41
(+5)
Jaime Lannister:
Jaime pours himself a cup and drinks in Brienne's bedchambers as he jealously questions her about Tormund Giantsbane.
(Glass of Wine Consumed)
39:01
(+5)
Jaime Lannister:
Jaime and Tyrion drink after toasting to Jaime's new relationship with Brienne. "To climbing mountains."
(Glass of Wine Consumed)
Acts of Intercourse
19:48
(+5)
Tormund Giantsbane:
After being spurned by Brienne, Tormund rebounds with a Northern girl who fancies him at the Feast of Winterfell.
Northern girl: " You can touch me. I'm not afraid of Wildlings."
Tormund: "Maybe you should be."
(Act of Intercourse)
Northern girl: " You can touch me. I'm not afraid of Wildlings."
Tormund: "Maybe you should be."
(Act of Intercourse)
27:20
(+5)
Jaime Lannister:
Jaime fumbles awkwardly in his first attempts at flirting with someone who is not a sibling, but ultimately succeeds in wooing Brienne with the 'ol "my it's quite hot in here".
(Act of Intercourse)
65:39
(+5)
Jaime Lannister:
Jaime sits brooding in front of the fireplace after a 2nd night with Brienne, reflecting on how one just can't go back to non-incest after hitting that high-grade sibling kush.
(Act of Intercourse)
submitted by nyan (approved!)
A Game of Thrones
8:54
(+1)
Daenerys Targaryen:
Daenerys sits at the head table during the celebratory feast at Winterfell.
(Basic Seat)
10:11
(+1)
Davos Seaworth:
Davos sits and observes nervously as Daenerys calls out Gendry for his Baratheon heritage.
(Basic Seat)
Varys sits in a chair at the edge of the head table as Tormund and the hall give a toast. "To Daenerys, the Dragon Queen!"
(Basic Seat)
15:20
(+1)
Daenerys Targaryen:
Daenerys sits back down to brood after toasting to Arya Stark, the Hero of Winterfell
(Basic Seat)
38:29
(+1)
Jaime Lannister:
Tyrion sits with Jaime in front of a fireplace in Winterfell, as Tyrion ribs Jaime on his newfound romance with Brienne.
(Basic Seat)
Varys sits down with Tyrion in the cabin below deck, discussing the secret of Jon's parentage.
(Basic Seat)
65:17
(+1)
Jaime Lannister:
Jaime sits on a chair in front of the fireplace after a 2nd night with Brienne, reflecting on how non-incest just doesn't really do it for him.
(Basic Seat)
Deaths
7:07
(+2)
Beric Dondarrion:
Beric's body lies atop a funeral pyre after the Battle of Winterfell.
(Dead Body Appearance)
7:17
(+2)
Lyanna Mormont:
Jon approaches Lyanna Mormont's body as they light the funeral pyres to honor the dead after the Battle of Winterfell.
(Dead Body Appearance)
Special
14:55
(+3)
Daenerys Targaryen:
Daenerys switches up to a burgundy dress at the Feast of Winterfell
(Special)
submitted by marr.virginia (approved!)
19:05
(+12)
Tormund Giantsbane:
Tormund eagerly stares at Brienne as she excuses herself to take a piss. His 3-second gaze is unfortunately interrupted by Jaime.
(Special)
submitted by conor_finlay (approved!)
The Feels
16:44
(+3)
Tormund Giantsbane:
Tormund continually splashes wine EVERYWHERE as he regales the crowd with the legend of Jon Snow.
(Ridiculously Funny Moment)
19:48
(+5)
Tormund Giantsbane:
Tormund's heart is broken as he regales his story to Clegane. "And after all that, this fucker comes north and takes her from me. Just takes her, like that. I mean it, Clegane. My heart is broken."
(Sad Feels)
Gendry proposes to Arya.
"I don't know how to be Lord of anything. I hardly know how to use a fork. All I know is that you're beautiful, and I love you, and none of it will be worth anything if you're not with me. So be with me. Be my wife. Be the Lady of Storm's End." (Warm Fuzzy Moment)
"I don't know how to be Lord of anything. I hardly know how to use a fork. All I know is that you're beautiful, and I love you, and none of it will be worth anything if you're not with me. So be with me. Be my wife. Be the Lady of Storm's End." (Warm Fuzzy Moment)
48:32
(+5)
Tormund Giantsbane:
Jon and Tormund say their final farewells, as Tormund leaves to take the Free Folk home beyond the Wall.
Tormund: "It isn't home. We need room to wander. I'll take them back through Castle Black as soon as the winter storms pass. Back where we belong." (Warm Fuzzy Moment)
Tormund: "It isn't home. We need room to wander. I'll take them back through Castle Black as soon as the winter storms pass. Back where we belong." (Warm Fuzzy Moment)
56:50
(+15)
Jaime Lannister:
After two days of playing house with Brienne, Jaime receives news of the events in King's Landing and reflects on where his true passions lie.
"You think I'm a good man? I pushed a boy out a tower window, crippled him for life for Cersei. I strangled my cousin with my own hands just to get back to Cersei. I would have murdered every man, woman and child in Riverrun for Cersei. She's hateful. And so am I." (Sad Feels)
"You think I'm a good man? I pushed a boy out a tower window, crippled him for life for Cersei. I strangled my cousin with my own hands just to get back to Cersei. I would have murdered every man, woman and child in Riverrun for Cersei. She's hateful. And so am I." (Sad Feels)
65:09
(+3)
Jaime Lannister:
After two nights in bed with Brienne, Jaime lies awake and reflects on how non-incest just really doesn't do it for him.
(I've made a huge mistake.)
submitted by nyan (approved!)