Matchup: Melisandre's Killer Shadow Queefs vs United Under Unique Unics' Unit for Ep 7

The Game of Bones

Melisandre's Killer Shadow Queefs (tommywaffles18)

Character	Drafted	Total	Politics	Insults	Wine	Sex	Special
Yara Greyjoy Theon's older sister, Yara was raised on the Iron Islands as a true Ironborn. She is a fearsome fighter and commands a longship of her own.	-	13	0	3	5	5	0
Olenna Redwyne (Grandma Tyrell) The matriarch of House Tyrell, Olenna is the grandmother of Margaery and Loras. She is known as the "Queen of Thorns" for her sarcasm and wit.	-	12	0	12	0	0	0
Sansa Stark The second eldest of the Stark children. Sansa has spent many of her past years as prisoner to the Lannisters and more recently, House Bolton, the new Warden of the North. Currently she is married to Ramsay, the heir of House Bolton, who keeps her imprisoned in Winterfell and tortures her sadistically. During the Bolton battle against Stannis Baratheon's forces, Sansa escapes over the Winterfell walls with the help of Theon Greyjoy, and the two make their way as far from the Boltons as possible. She is a huge fan of lemon cakes.	#11	9	3	6	0	0	0
Theon Greyjoy Heir to the Iron Islands, and formerly a ward of House Stark. Theon has been broken through torture by the hands of Ramsay Bolton, but has escaped Winterfell along with Sansa Stark during the chaos of the Battle of Winterfell.	#19	8	0	0	5	0	3
Davos Seaworth Ser Davos is a knight serving Stannis Baratheon, and one of his most trusted advisors. He is often at odds with the Red Priestess Melisandre.	#22	6	3	3	0	0	0
Tormund Giantsbane A leader of the Wildlings, and formerly a trusted lieutenant and second-in-command to Mance Rayder, the King Beyond the Wall. Although they have met in battle more than once, he bears a grudging respect for Jon Snow.	#27	6	3	3	0	0	0
Brienne of Tarth A skilled fighter and heir to House Tarth. A sworn sword to the late Catelyn Stark, she continues her mission to ensure the safety of the Stark girls.	#6	3	0	0	0	0	3
Daenerys Targaryen The last royal member of the Targaryen dynasty, Daenerys and her three dragons have carved out a revolutionary empire in the east, liberating several slave cities and acquiring an army of Unsullied warriors. Her recent rule over the slave city of Meereen has been met with strife, however, and she currently finds herself lost with her largest dragon, Drogon, in Dothraki territory.	#3	0	0	0	0	0	0
Totals		57	9	27	10	5	6

United Under Unique Unics' Unit (marcus.barkac)

Character	Drafted	Total	Politics	Deaths
Margaery Tyrell The wife of King Tommen Baratheon and Queen of the Seven Kingdoms. Her increasing influence over the young king have put at her odds against his mother, Cersei Lannister.	#24	6	6	0
Alliser Thorne A former master-of-arms and acting Commander of the Night's Watch, Thorne narrowly lost the Lord Commander choosing to Jon Snow in S5. He later led a mutiny of disgruntled Night's Watch members against Jon Snow, stabbing and leaving him for dead.	#32	1	0	1
Varys Formerly the Master of Whisperers in King's Landing, Varys controls a vast network of spies. After smuggling Tyrion Lannister to Essos, he reveals himself as a supporter of Daenerys Targaryen's claim to the Iron Throne. In Daenerys' absence, he serves with Tyrion Lannister and presides over the rule of Meereen.	#9	0	0	0
Petyr Baelish (Littlefinger) Formerly the Master of Coin, Littlefinger is a conniving political mastermind and serves as Warden of the East after his behind-the-scenes assassination of Lisa Tully.	#16	0	0	0
Jorah Mormont The exiled head of House Mormont. Jorah was previously one of Daenerys Targaryen's most trusted advisors before his banishment. He returned to her service during a revolt in the fighting pits of Meereen, and now travels with Daario Naharis to rescue Daenerys, who has disappeared along with one of her dragons, Drogon.	#17	0	0	0
Jaqen H'ghar The leader of the Faceless Men of Braavos, and a skilled assassin. He trains Arya to become an assassin in the House of Black and White.	#25	0	0	0
Tyrion Lannister The third, stunted dwarf of the Lannister children - a fugitive from Westeros after losing his trial for the murder of King Joffrey, he has escaped and found service as an advisor to Daenerys Targaryen.	#1	0	0	0
Cersei Lannister Queen Regent of the Seven Kingdoms and mother to King Tommen. Afflicted by a rare water allergy.	#8	0	0	0
Totals		7	6	1

Political Wins

11:14 (+3) Margaery Tyrell:

Instead of bringing Olenna Tyrell in to repent for her sins, as she had promised the High Sparrow, Margaery secretly tips off her grandmother of her imminent danger in King's Landing, convincing her to leave the city. (Act of Betrayal)

submitted by lize1017 (approved!)

11:16 (+3) Margaery Tyrell:

Margaery convinces her grandmother Olenna to leave King's Landing for her own safety: "Go home. Find comfort in prayer and good works. The Mother watches over us all." (Convincing Argument)

13:39 (+3) Tormund Giantsbane:

Tormund convinces the other Wildlings to march for Jon Snow. "The Crows killed him, because he spoke for the Free Folk when no other Southerners would. He died for us. If we are not willing to do the same for him, we're cowards. If that's what we are, we deserve to be the last of the Free Folk." (Convincing Argument)

26:31 (+3) Davos Seaworth:

After Jon Snow and Sansa Stark prove unconvincing, Davos convinces the young Lyanna Mormont to rally against the Bolton army. "Because Jeor Mormont and Jon Snow both understood that the real war isn't between a few squabbling houses. It's between the living and the dead. And make no mistake, my lady, the dead are coming ... As long as the Boltons hold Winterfell, the North is divided. And a divided North won't stand a chance against the Night King." (Convincing Argument)

27:11 (+3) Sansa Stark:

Lyanna Mormont pledges her house to Jon Snow's fighting forces: "House Mormont has kept faith with House Stark for a thousand years... We will not break faith today." (New Follower/Prisoner)

submitted by cmwalken15 (approved!)

Insults Delivered / Funny Lines

9:44 (+3) Olenna Redwyne (Grandma Tyrell):

remaking on Septa Unella: "Does it move or talk?" (Witty Insult)

submitted by ace75318 (approved!)

9:55 (+3) Olenna Redwyne (Grandma Tyrell):

to Septa Unella: "You're now in your sanctuary now, my dear. All I have to do is whistle and my men will stroll you in here and bash you about until I tell them to stop... *if* I tell them to stop." (Threat)

15:00 (+3) Tormund Giantsbane:

Jon Snow: "Are you sure they'll come (the Wildling armies)?"
Tormund: "We're not clever like you Southerners. When we say we'll do something, we do it." (Witty Insult)

16:14 (+3) Olenna Redwyne (Grandma Tyrell):

to Cersei: "I wonder if you're the worst person I've ever met. At a certain age it's hard to recall. But the truly vile do stand out through the years." (Witty Insult)

17:16 (+3) Olenna Redwyne (Grandma Tyrell):

Olenna: "You've lost, Cersei. It's the only joy I could find in all this misery." (Witty Insult)

27:51 (+3) Davos Seaworth:

on the 62 Mormont soldiers: "If they're half as ferocious as their Lady, the Boltons are doomed." (Funny Line)

submitted by Laxis (approved!)

How is this funny? He's complimenting her, not mocking her. -alicehanners

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2016 Jun 9
Why does it have to be mocking for it to be funny? It's a funny line, not an insult -Laxis

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2016 Jun 9 righteous likes this
Why does it have to be mocking for it to be funny? It's a funny line, not an insult -Laxis

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2016 Jun 9
I thought it a particularly funny jab and a wink to the viewer about Ramsay's "twenty good men." -dopeghoti

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2016 Jun 12 Laxis and righteous like this
It's funny because I burst out laughing even knowing it was coming -righteous

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2016 Jun 30

35:09 (+3) Yara Greyjoy:

to Theon: "Nothing on the Iron Islands has an ass like that. Doesn't interest you anymore?"
(Witty Insult)

submitted by cmwalken15 (approved!)

38:36 (+3) Sansa Stark:

to Jon: "So [Davos Seaworth] is your most trusted advisor now? Because he secured 62 men from a 10-year-old?" (Witty Insult)

38:43 (+3) Sansa Stark:

Jon: "Ser Davos is the reason I'm standing here talking to you and he served Stannis for years."
Sansa: "Stannis... who lost the Blackwater, who murdered his own brother, who doesn't have a head?" (Witty Insult)

Glasses of Wine Consumed

35:36 (+5) Yara Greyjoy:

Yara drinks while giving a pep talk to Theon. (Glass of Wine Consumed)

35:48 (+5) Theon Greyjoy:

Yara forces Theon to drink while the fleet is docked.
Theon: "I don't want any."
Yara: "I don't care what you want. Drink." (Glass of Wine Consumed)

Acts of Intercourse

37:28 (+5) Yara Greyjoy:

Yara wanders off with a whore in Volantis. "Now, since it's my last night ashore for a long while, I'm gonna go fuck the tits off this one." (Act of Intercourse)

Deaths

+1 for Alliser Thorne

Special

3:52 (+3) Brienne of Tarth:

Septon Ray: "How many men did it take to cut you down?"
Sandor Clegane: "Just one."
Ray: "Whew... he must have been some kind of a monster."
Sandor: "He was a woman." (Special)

35:42 (+3) Theon Greyjoy:

Yara forces Theon to drink while the fleet is docked.
Theon: "I don't want any."
Yara: "I don't care what you want. Drink." (Special)

submitted by rls14 (approved!)

This should be scored for Yara, not Theon -moonbaseu92

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2016 Jun 6
It's for Theon's special, which is any time he acts against his own interest when instructed to by another -bookworm13457

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2016 Jun 6 jedjackoway likes this
In fairness, I don't think it was against Theon's best interest; it was against the lingering Reek's. -dopeghoti

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2016 Jun 6
This definitely should invoke his special ability. The ability is "when Theon acts against his own self-interest, due to someone else's instructions." He doesn't want to drink, that's his self-interest. he is forced to by his sister's instruction. -skywalkerdude

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2016 Jun 7 jedjackoway and alicehanners like this
My comment was in jest, sir or ma'am or other. -dopeghoti

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2016 Jun 7

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