Joffrey's Only Friend

5-5, 42.5 roto pts (#4)
Z-Score: 0.273 (percentile: 60.74%)
Weeks at #1: 0
Categories won: Deaths (45)
Best Week: Episode 9: The Dance of Dragons (+5 roto points)
Team MVP: Stannis Baratheon (picked #8, 54 points, 21.51% of team total)
Longest winstreak: W-3

Roster Stats

Character	Drafted	Total	Kills	Politics	Insults	Wine	Sex	Deaths	Special
Stannis Baratheon The eldest brother of King Robert, he is the rightful heir to the Irone Throne.	#8	54	14	15	9	0	0	10	6
Barristan Selmy The former Lord Commander of the Kingsguard of Robert and Joffrey Baratheon. After being dismissed by King Joffrey, he joins Daenerys to serve as her advisor and Queensguard.	#24	48	30	3	0	0	0	15	0
Tormund Giantsbane A leader of the Wildlings, he is a trusted lieutenant and second-in-command to Mance Rayder, the King Beyond the Wall.	#57	44	26	15	3	0	0	0	0
Jaime Lannister The second of the Lannister children, he is Cersei's lover and twin brother, and also the father of her three children. He also serves as Lord Commander of the Kingsguard.	#9	33	2	3	6	10	0	0	12
Meryn Trant A member of the Kingsguard, sworn to protect the King.	#56	27	4	0	3	5	5	10	0
Selyse Baratheon Lord Stannis Baratheon's wife. She is a strong believer in the new faith of the red priestess Melisandre, who follows the Lord of Light.	#40	20	10	0	0	0	0	10	0
Loras Tyrell The heir to Highgarden and regarded as one of the most skilled knights in Westeros. He is the brother of Margaery Tyrell.	#25	11	0	0	3	0	5	0	3
Qyburn A disgraced former Maester, who was banished from the order for engaging in forbidden experiments. He is recruited by Cersei to assist in various medical facilities.	#72	8	2	3	3	0	0	0	0
Grand Maester Pycelle The Grand Maester of the Seven Kingdoms. Pycelle is highly educated and serves as an advisor to the King.	#41	3	0	3	0	0	0	0	0
Gregor Clegane (The Mountain) A knight and the Head of House Clegane, bannermen to the Lannisters. He was called back to King's Landing by Cersei to fight as the Crown's champion in Tyrion's trial.	#73	3	0	3	0	0	0	0	0
Totals		251	88	45	27	15	10	45	21

Roster

charId	Character	Special
51	Stannis Baratheon The eldest brother of King Robert, he is the rightful heir to the Irone Throne.	+1 point each time he makes a Stannis-style pedantic correction. +1 point when he mentions that someone will/should "bend the knee" [new]
19	Jaime Lannister The second of the Lannister children, he is Cersei's lover and twin brother, and also the father of her three children. He also serves as Lord Commander of the Kingsguard.	* +1 point for awkward waves with his metal hand * +1 point when he uses his metal hand in a combat situation * +1 point when someone (excl. Cersei) references incest with Cersei or her childrens' bastardy directly to him * 2x multiplier for sex acts involving incest (first cousin or closer)
35	Barristan Selmy The former Lord Commander of the Kingsguard of Robert and Joffrey Baratheon. After being dismissed by King Joffrey, he joins Daenerys to serve as her advisor and Queensguard.	+1 point when he makes a suggestion to Daenerys and she ignores it.
60	Loras Tyrell The heir to Highgarden and regarded as one of the most skilled knights in Westeros. He is the brother of Margaery Tyrell.	+1 point anytime someone refers to him using sword-based analogies, or any other reference to his sexuality.
125	Selyse Baratheon Lord Stannis Baratheon's wife. She is a strong believer in the new faith of the red priestess Melisandre, who follows the Lord of Light.	+1 point when she does something crazy or New Age.
74	Grand Maester Pycelle The Grand Maester of the Seven Kingdoms. Pycelle is highly educated and serves as an advisor to the King.	+1 point when he walks 5 or more steps in a row without stopping
75	Meryn Trant A member of the Kingsguard, sworn to protect the King.
67	Tormund Giantsbane A leader of the Wildlings, he is a trusted lieutenant and second-in-command to Mance Rayder, the King Beyond the Wall.	* every mention of "killing Crows" * every on-screen second he stares into Brienne's soul (rounded up)
72	Qyburn A disgraced former Maester, who was banished from the order for engaging in forbidden experiments. He is recruited by Cersei to assist in various medical facilities.	* +1 point whenever he receives a new specimen for his experiments * +1 politics point when reporting information from his "little birds"
28	Gregor Clegane (The Mountain) A knight and the Head of House Clegane, bannermen to the Lannisters. He was called back to King's Landing by Cersei to fight as the Crown's champion in Tyrion's trial.	* Scores for any kills of non-combatants * Scores for each sentence spoken * Interacting with bowls

Kills

Episode 3: The High Sparrow

46:58 (+2) Qyburn:

Qyburn kills a rat for his experiments, splashing its blood onto his magnifying glass. (Kill of Unnamed Character)

Episode 4: The Sons of the Harpy

35:33 (+2) Jaime Lannister:

Jaime catches the sabre of the Dornish rider in his metal hand, allowing him to retrieve his sword and stab him. (Kill of Unnamed Character)

47:48 (+30) Barristan Selmy:

Barristan arrives to the scene of the Unsullied ambush. He cuts down 15 of the Sons of the Harpy in an attempt to save Grey Worm, but is eventually cut down by the mob.
1. Slashed across the back as Barristan arrives
2. Slashed across the stomach as the mob engages
3. Slashed across the side after his first strike is parried
4. Held in place by Barristan to receive a stab from a fellow Son of the Harpy
5. Slashed across the chest
6. Sliced through the stomach
7. Sliced across the back
8. Stabbed through the stomach
9. Beheaded from behind
10. Slashed through with an uppercut swing
11. Stabbed through the stomach
12. Slashes across the stomach
13. Slashes after stabbing Barristan's leg
14. Stabbed through while Barristan is kneeling on the ground
15. Stabbed simultaneously while another stabs Barristan through the stomach (mostly obscured behind the surviving fighter) (Kill of Unnamed Character)

There's a lot of speculation on this - Barristan is definitely injured but may still survive. Death points (if any) will be counted in the episode where death is confirmed. -nyan

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2015 May 5
I think #4 may be somewhat debatable - assists don't count, and Barristan simply held the Harpy in place while he was stabbed by the other. Arguably though, Barristan knew the stab was coming, and he positioned the Harpy in the way to receive it. I went with that interpretation and credited Barristan with the kill. -nyan

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2015 May 5 alicehanners likes this
In the preview for episode 5, there's a shot of Dany standing over Barristan's body and I'm 100% sure he's dead -cfitzgerald

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2015 May 7
See event/1525 for more discussion.
While the previews may give a hint, I don't think they're authoritative - e.g. if there's a scene showing Barristan's funeral, it may come from later in the episode and Barristan actually gets an opening scene with a few last words to Daenerys before dying. Also since some viewers don't watch them, it would introduce some spoilers to include information from the previews in the scoring. -nyan

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2015 May 7

Episode 8: Hardhome

33:05 (+10) Tormund Giantsbane:

After he is insulted by the Lord of Bones, Tormund steals his club and smashes in the Lord of Bones' skull with it. (Kill of Named Character)

48:00 (+2) Tormund Giantsbane:

Tormund cuts down a wight. (Kill of Unnamed Character)

49:01 (+2) Tormund Giantsbane:

Tormund slices down another wight as Jon makes a run for the main Wildling hut where the dragonglass daggers were left. (Kill of Unnamed Character)

52:21 (+6) Tormund Giantsbane:

Tormund cuts down a wildling, stabs another through the back of the head, and stabs another through the neck. (Kill of Unnamed Character)

53:59 (+4) Tormund Giantsbane:

Tormund headbutts a wight, then throws his sword into the stomach of another that charges at him. (Kill of Unnamed Character)

54:28 (+2) Tormund Giantsbane:

Tormund cuts down a wight as he, Jon Snow, and Edd make a run for the dock. (Kill of Unnamed Character)

Episode 9: The Dance of Dragons

33:57 (+10) Stannis Baratheon:

Stannis sacrifices his own daughter Shireen to the Lord of Light, allowing the red priestess Melisandre to burn her at the stake. (Kill of Named Character)

Episode 10: Mother's Mercy

0:00 (+2) Meryn Trant:

Meryn whips the third girl (later found to be Arya Stark) in the Braavosi brothel, striking her so hard that he breaks his stick. "I can see I have my work cut out for me." (Minor Injury of Named Character)

3:49 (+10) Selyse Baratheon:

Selyse hangs herself after she is devastated by the sacrificial burning of her daughter Shireen. (Kill of Named Character)

14:07 (+4) Stannis Baratheon:

Stannis kills two Bolton soldiers who attempt to finish him off in the woods outside Winterfell. (Kill of Unnamed Character)

20:03 (+2) Meryn Trant:

Meryn Trant whips two young girls in the brothel of Braavos with a stick. (Major Injury of Unnamed Character)

Political Wins

Episode 2: The House of Black and White

19:20 (+3) Jaime Lannister:

Jaime coerces Bronn into his service, marrying off the noblewoman he is betrothed to, Lollys Stokeworth, to another knight, stripping Bronn of his opportunity for a noble title and lands. "Because you're going to come with me and help me with something important. And when we return... I'm going to give you a much better girl, and a much better castle." (Politics - uncategorized)

25:41 (+3) Barristan Selmy:

Barristan convinces Daenerys to give the Son of the Harpy a fair trial instead of executing him immediately. "Your Grace... I served in [Mad King Aerys'] Kingsguard. I was at his side from the first. Your enemies did not lie." (Politics - uncategorized)

31:11 (+3) Qyburn:

Cersei names Qyburn the new Master of Whispers, replacing Varys. (Politics - uncategorized)

Episode 5: Kill the Boy

12:42 (+3) Tormund Giantsbane:

Tormund convinces Jon to mobilize the Night's Watch (and Jon himself) to accompany him on the mission to Hardhome, "They need to hear it from you. They need to know the ships they are boarding wot be torched in the middle of the sea. You come with me or I don't go." (Politics - uncategorized)

submitted by moonbaseu92 (approved!)

"Convincing: A character can only "change minds" after they had initially decided in the opposite decision.
Work-in-progress on the definition of "major" decision. Decisions are considered major if:
They mobilize an armed force. Precedents: Ned Stark ordering Beric Dondarrion to arrest the Mountain."
-moonbaseu92

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2015 May 27
hmm that's a fair point on Tormund's part (just to convince Jon). I may argue that Jon also deserves a point for convincing Tormund to go on this mission in the first place. Question though - did any of the Night's Watch actually come along on the journey? Or was it just Jon and a group of Wildlings? -nyan

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2015 May 27
Yes, there were at least 2 Brother's riding off with Jon and Tormund. D Edd among them. -moonbaseu92

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2015 May 28
Added this in... back in E5 when Tormund initially did the convincing. -nyan

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2015 Jun 1

38:37 (+3) Stannis Baratheon:

Stannis ignores Ser Davos Seaworth's caution and gives the order to mobilize the Baratheon army. "We have the advantage: more men, more horses, all fed and rested. But every day we wait, the odds shift in Bolton's favor. This could turn to winter at any moment. We have to act now. Give the order. We march at sunrise." (Politics - uncategorized)

Episode 7: The Gift

18:26 (+3) Stannis Baratheon:

Stannis orders his army to march on through the winter storm, against Ser Davos' counsel.
Davos Seaworth: "It's better to wait for the right time than risk everything."
Stannis: "This is the right time and I will risk everything. Because if I don't, we've lost. We march to victory or we march to defeat. But we go forward. Only forward." (Politics - uncategorized)

Episode 8: Hardhome

14:06 (+3) Grand Maester Pycelle:

In Cersei Lannister's absence, Pycelle takes control of the Small Council to appoint Kevan Lannister as Hand of the King. (Politics - uncategorized)

submitted by moonbaseu92 (approved!)

Executive decision? It could possibly fit, as long as someone opposed it (does Cersei?). Originally she did want to offer him the same role, however. -nyan

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2015 Jun 2
She wanted him to be "Master of War", she specifically didn't want him to be Hand as she wanted to retain her position. -moonbaseu92

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2015 Jun 2 nyan likes this
Ooh, good point, I got them confused. Sounds like an overrule to me, I'll add this. -nyan

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2015 Jun 2

36:14 (+3) Tormund Giantsbane:

Tormund convinces the Wildlings to not kill Jon Snow for killing Mance. "None of you saw Mance die. I did. The southern king who broke our army, Stannis, wanted to burn him alive to send us a message. Jon Snow defied that cunt's orders. His arrow was mercy." (Politics - uncategorized)

38:45 (+3) Tormund Giantsbane:

Tormund convinces the Wildlings to accept Jon Snow's invitation and depart Hardhome to head south of the Wall.
Karsi: "I'll never trust a man in black. But I trust you, Tormund. If you say this is the way, we're with you."
Tormund: "This is the way." (Politics - uncategorized)

39:07 (+6) Tormund Giantsbane:

Karsi and the Giant Wun Weg Wun Dar Wun agree to follow Tormund south of the Wall. (Politics - uncategorized)

Episode 9: The Dance of Dragons

8:26 (+3) Stannis Baratheon:

Stannis overrules Ser Davos's protests, and orders him away to Castle Black.
Ser Davos: "The King's Hand should never abandon the king, especially in time of war."
Stannis: "You're not abandoning me. You're obeying a command ... Ride for Castle Black. Don't come back empty-handed." (Politics - uncategorized)

8:44 (+3) Stannis Baratheon:

Stannis denies Ser Davos' plead to escort the royal family back to Castle Black.
Davos: "Your Grace, perhaps Queen Selyse and Princess Shireen could accompany me."
Stannis: "My family stays with me."
Davos: "At least let me take Shireen. A siege is no place for a little girl."
Stannis: "My family stays with me." (Politics - uncategorized)

33:03 (+3) Stannis Baratheon:

Stannis overrules his wife Selyse's last second change of heart on the sacrifice of Shireen.
Selyse Baratheon: "We can't."
Stannis: "There's no other way. She has king's blood." (Politics - uncategorized)

Episode 10: Mother's Mercy

53:25 (+3) Gregor Clegane (The Mountain):

The Mountain, rehabilitated by Qyburn, is made a member of the Kingsguard. (Politics - uncategorized)

Insults Delivered / Funny Lines

Episode 1: The Wars to Come

29:18 (+3) Loras Tyrell:

Loras lazily drones on to Cersei about the late Tywin: "what a... force to be reckoned with." (Funny Line)

Episode 3: The High Sparrow

25:02 (+3) Stannis Baratheon:

Stannis: "You're as stubborn as your father. And as honorable."
Jon Snow: "I can imagine no higher praise"
Stannis: "I didn't mean it as praise. Honor got your father killed." (Witty Insult)

submitted by Reaper (approved!)

7 more comments - see full thread

Wait, did you really get 2 x 3 points for the same thing? -pretty_mvtherfvcker

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2015 Apr 29
This was my initial thought as well, @pretty_mvutherfvcker. You could read it as Stannis calling Jon stupid, because honor is a stupid trait that will get him killed. Also a correction on Jon's naivety in assuming that honor was always a good trait. We could go back to rejecting this one if enough people disagree. -nyan

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2015 Apr 29
the line fits two categories special/insult :) -Reaper

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2015 Apr 29 moonbaseu92 likes this

26:24 (+3) Stannis Baratheon:

Jon Snow: "I heard it was best to keep your enemies close."
Stannis: "Whoever said that didn't have many enemies." (Funny Line)

submitted by Reaper (approved!)

43:11 (+3) Qyburn:

to High Septon: "So you were ministering to the needs of these... devout prostitutes." (Funny Line)

submitted by wpearsal (approved!)

Episode 4: The Sons of the Harpy

22:16 (+3) Stannis Baratheon:

Stannis: "Are you lonely?"
Shireen: "Just bored."
Stannis: "My father used to tell me that boredom indicates a lack of inner resources." (Witty Insult)

36:26 (+3) Jaime Lannister:

after asking Bronn to bury the bodies of the Dornish riders: "I can't dig very well with one hand. Not at all, really." (Funny Line)

Episode 8: Hardhome

36:50 (+3) Tormund Giantsbane:

on Jon Snow: "He's prettier than both my daughters, but he knows how to fight." (Witty Insult)

Episode 9: The Dance of Dragons

11:30 (+3) Jaime Lannister:

Jaime criticizes Myrcella's revealing attire in Doran Martell's court:
Jaime: "What a lovely dress."
Myrcella: "You don't like it?"
Jaime: "You must be cold." (Witty Insult)

24:18 (+3) Meryn Trant:

to the Braavosi brothel manager, after she brings out a young servant girl for Ser Meryn: "You'll have a fresh one for me tomorrow." (Threat)

Glasses of Wine Consumed

Episode 4: The Sons of the Harpy

3:49 (+5) Jaime Lannister:

Jaime takes a swig while below the deck of the merchant vessel that is smuggling him to Dorne. (Glass of Wine Consumed)

Episode 9: The Dance of Dragons

13:00 (+5) Jaime Lannister:

Jaime drinks after Doran Martell proposes a toast. "Let us drink to Tommen, the First of His Name, King of the Andals and the First Men, Lord of the Seven Kingdoms." (Glass of Wine Consumed)

22:42 (+5) Meryn Trant:

Ser Meryn drinks as he chooses a prostitute in the Braavosi brothel. "Too old.' (Glass of Wine Consumed)

Acts of Intercourse

Episode 1: The Wars to Come

32:02 (+5) Loras Tyrell:

Loras in bed with Olyvar, making pillowtalk about his birthmarks. (Act of Intercourse)

Episode 9: The Dance of Dragons

24:24 (+5) Meryn Trant:

Ser Meryn chooses the young servant girl in the brothel, after running through the set of regulars who were all "too old." (Act of Intercourse)

Deaths

Episode 5: Kill the Boy

2:14 (+10) Barristan Selmy:

Barristan's body lies in Daenery's throneroom after he was cut down by the Sons of the Harpy. (Death)

Episode 6: Unbowed, Unbent, Unbroken

+1 for Barristan Selmy

Episode 7: The Gift

+1 for Barristan Selmy

Episode 8: Hardhome

+1 for Barristan Selmy

Episode 9: The Dance of Dragons

+1 for Barristan Selmy

Episode 10: Mother's Mercy

3:49 (+10) Selyse Baratheon:

Selyse hangs herself after she is devastated by the sacrificial burning of her daughter Shireen. (Death)

16:11 (+10) Stannis Baratheon:

The strong implication is that he was, in fact killed at the hands of Brienne of Tarth. I realize it wasn't technically on-screen and could be considered to be ambiguous, but we never saw Syrio Forel's death or the Hound's death, but the understanding is that they are dead as well. And if at the start of the next season, it turns out that he did, in fact, die, it'll be a little late to go back and add the points. Would the points be given to whoever has him at the beginning of next season, then? (Death)

submitted by cfitzgerald (approved!)

The precedents for kills and deaths has been to count them in the episode where it was confirmed - Barristan Selmy was treated that way (scored when we actually saw him lying on the table in the next episode), and neither Syrio Forel nor the Hound are actually counted for death points yet. Davos in S2E9 closely paralleled this - received what was possibly a fatal blow, wasn't heard from the rest of the season, then showed up fine in S3E1.

Normally the cliffhangers are between episodes and it's not as big of a deal, since the points are still counted eventually. In this case, teams that drafted Stannis would miss out on the points entirely (if he's actually dead), which is unfortunate. But the false positive is a much bigger problem: if we count a death in S5, then in S6E1 we find out the character is still alive, the S5 results are unequivocally wrong, and we may find ourselves revising scores and winners 9 months later. Counting the death for S6E1 is at least consistent to a rule that we'll count the deaths when we see a body. -nyan

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2015 Jun 16
That all said, the event suggestion is listed here because there's a very believable argument that Stannis is actually dead-dead. If everyone else is equally certain here, I'll go ahead and add this (and Brienne's kill points) in. -nyan

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2015 Jun 16
I think it's ambiguous whether he's dead-dead and whether Brienne had a last minute change of heart when she was reminded of her duty to rescue Sansa (as opposed to exacting vengeance for the death of Renly). -elaine

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2015 Jun 16
The official Game of Thrones viewer guide says Brienne killed Stannis -cfitzgerald

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2015 Jun 18
Repeating comment here: the pure scorekeeper in me doesn't like this as much either, but I'll end up recording the Kill and Death points based on it being highly likely that it happened. Pragmatically there is more riding on this death than Barristan's, because his potential death would just be recorded in the subsequent episode, which isn't a possibility here. Ultimately I think more players will be happier with the points recorded.

I'll make this an official "last episode of season" exception in the Rulebook, where the kill/death standard can be lowered from "confirmed" to simply "highly likely". -nyan

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2015 Jun 30

22:44 (+10) Meryn Trant:

Meryn Trant is brutally stabbed and killed in a Braavosi brothel by Arya Stark, disguised as a young prostitute. (Death)

+1 for Barristan Selmy

Special

Episode 2: The House of Black and White

15:31 (+3) Jaime Lannister:

Cersei talks to Jaime about Myrcella. "Then don't call her your daughter. You've never been a father to her." (Special)

Cersei and Jamie both mention their bastard children twice?
-mmccor4140

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2015 Apr 23 wpearsal likes this
It's a little fuzzy - the bastardy mentions were grouped into the same conversation, but I can see a case for counting the lines as separate mentions. Other thoughts? -nyan

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2015 Apr 23
Is there an historical precedent for it? I feel like Sam made multiple, similar jokes about Janos Slynt too, but wasn't sure if they should all count? -wpearsal

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2015 Apr 23

Episode 3: The High Sparrow

25:02 (+3) Stannis Baratheon:

Stannis corrects Jon Snow
Stannis: "You're as stubborn as your father. And as honorable."
Jon Snow: "I can imagine no higher praise"
Stannis: "I didn't mean it as praise. Honor got your father killed." (Special)

submitted by Reaper (approved!)

Episode 4: The Sons of the Harpy

4:10 (+3) Jaime Lannister:

Jaime: "We're not kidnapping their princess. We're rescuing my niece, bringing her back to her family."
Bronn: "Your niece?" (Special)

Should this be an insult/funny line for Bronn? -lsherman17

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2015 May 5
Shouldn't Jamie get Special points for this? '1 point when someone references incest with Cersei or her childrens' bastardy directly to him' -moonbaseu92

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2015 May 5
Shouldn't Jamie get Special points for this? '1 point when someone references incest with Cersei or her childrens' bastardy directly to him' -moonbaseu92

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2015 May 5
@moonbaseu92 slightly confused - this is Jaime getting the Special points for this line -nyan

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2015 May 5
Why are Jaime's kills being counted as 2 points? -vitalik

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2015 May 5
Either I wasn't paying attention or this way before it was counting as Jamie's Special -moonbaseu92

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2015 May 5

Episode 5: Kill the Boy

13:21 (+3) Stannis Baratheon:

Stannis corrects First Builder Yarwyck during a meeting of the Night's Watch.
Othell Yarwyck: "Let them die (the Wildlings). We got out our own to worry about. Less enemies for us."
Stannis: "Fewer." (Special)

Episode 6: Unbowed, Unbent, Unbroken

39:26 (+3) Loras Tyrell:

The High Sparrow lays out the Faith's accusations against Loras Tyrell: "Do you deny all the charges against you? Fornication. Buggery. Blasphemy... You never lay with Renly Baratheon? ... Nor any other man?" (Special)

Episode 9: The Dance of Dragons

27:07 (+3) Jaime Lannister:

Ellaria: "You love her very much, don't you?"
Jaime: "Of course, she's my niece."
Ellaria: "I wasn't talking about her." (Special)

Episode 10: Mother's Mercy

29:07 (+3) Jaime Lannister:

Jaime is confronted with his incest by his own daughter, Myrcella: "I know. About you and mother. I think a part of me always knew. And I'm glad. I'm glad that you're my father." (Special)

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