Crows Before Hoes

40.5 roto pts (#5)
Z-Score: 0 (percentile: 50%)
Weeks at #1: 0
Categories won: Special (33)
Best Week: Episode 10: Mother's Mercy (+7 roto points)
Team MVP: Samwell Tarly (picked #29, 49 points, 28.65% of team total)

Roster Stats

Character	Drafted	Total	Kills	Politics	Insults	Wine	Sex	Deaths	Special
Samwell Tarly A steward of the Night's Watch. He is a close friend to Jon Snow, and one of the few people known to have killed a White Walker.	#29	49	0	9	18	5	5	0	12
Sansa Stark The second eldest Stark child. Though currently married to Tyrion Lannister, she has been smuggled into the Vale by Littlefinger, where she poses as his niece, Alayne Stone.	#4	34	0	12	3	5	5	0	9
Jaqen H'ghar A member of the Faceless Men of Braavos, and a skilled assassin. After helping Arya escape from Harrenhal, his whereabouts are unknown.	#52	33	12	0	3	5	0	10	3
Theon Greyjoy Heir to the Iron Islands, and formerly a ward of House Stark. Theon is currently a captive of Ramsay Bolton.	#13	25	10	6	0	0	0	0	9
Myrcella Baratheon The only daughter of King Robert Baratheon and Queen Cersei Lannister. She was sent to Dorne to secure an alliance by marriage with House Martell.	#45	16	0	3	3	0	0	10	0
Areo Hotah The personal bodyguard for Doran Martell.	#61	8	2	3	3	0	0	0	0
Nymeria Sand One of Oberyn Martell's bastards, known as Sand Snakes.	#36	6	0	0	6	0	0	0	0
Robin Arryn The young, sickly son of Jon Arryn and Lysa Tully. He is Lord of the Vale, although Petyr Baelish serves as Lord Protector until he comes of age.	#20	0	0	0	0	0	0	0	0
Totals		171	24	33	36	15	10	20	33

Roster

charId	Character	Special
5	Sansa Stark The second eldest Stark child. Though currently married to Tyrion Lannister, she has been smuggled into the Vale by Littlefinger, where she poses as his niece, Alayne Stone.	* Lady's actions contribute to her points. * +1 point in every scene she cries
61	Theon Greyjoy Heir to the Iron Islands, and formerly a ward of House Stark. Theon is currently a captive of Ramsay Bolton.	+1 point for scenes where Theon refers to himself as "Reek" +1 point when his missing manhood is referenced
84	Robin Arryn The young, sickly son of Jon Arryn and Lysa Tully. He is Lord of the Vale, although Petyr Baelish serves as Lord Protector until he comes of age.	Gains points in the the Wine category for breastfeeding. +1 point when he mentions making something "fly".
40	Samwell Tarly A steward of the Night's Watch. He is a close friend to Jon Snow, and one of the few people known to have killed a White Walker.	+1 point for reading books, mentioning he "read that in a book", or writing raven letters.
189	Nymeria Sand One of Oberyn Martell's bastards, known as Sand Snakes.	+1 for invoking the name of Oberyn Martell
78	Myrcella Baratheon The only daughter of King Robert Baratheon and Queen Cersei Lannister. She was sent to Dorne to secure an alliance by marriage with House Martell.
105	Jaqen H'ghar A member of the Faceless Men of Braavos, and a skilled assassin. After helping Arya escape from Harrenhal, his whereabouts are unknown.	+1 every time he dons a new disguise In the event that a Faceless Man's identity is ambiguous, points are awarded to the character whose face is worn at the time of the scoring event.
187	Areo Hotah The personal bodyguard for Doran Martell.

Kills

Episode 6: Unbowed, Unbent, Unbroken

9:20 (+2) Jaqen H'ghar:

Jaqen whips Arya bloody with a switch as she fails her test of lie-telling in the House of Black and White. (Minor Injury of Named Character)

Episode 9: The Dance of Dragons

16:54 (+2) Areo Hotah:

Areo delivers a stiff elbow to the face of Bronn, as ordered by Trystane Martell. (Minor Injury of Named Character)

Episode 10: Mother's Mercy

18:43 (+10) Theon Greyjoy:

Theon breaks and throws Myranda from the top of the Winterfell walls onto the ground below, saving Sansa Stark. (Kill of Named Character)

24:09 (+10) Jaqen H'ghar:

Jaqen commits suicide to balance out Arya's killing of Meryn Trant. "A girl stole from the Many-Faced God. Now a debt is owed. Only death can pay for life." (Kill of Named Character)

Political Wins

Episode 2: The House of Black and White

40:56 (+3) Samwell Tarly:

Sam stumps for Jon Snow as a candidate for Lord Commander of the Night's Watch, convincing many in the room. "He may be young, but he's the commander we turned to when the night was darkest." (Politics - uncategorized)

Episode 4: The Sons of the Harpy

18:03 (+3) Samwell Tarly:

Samwell convinces Jon to sign a letter requesting recruits from Roose Bolton. "We swore to be the Watchers on the Wall. We can't watch the Wall with 50 men. And we can't get more men without help from the Warden of the North." (Politics - uncategorized)

Episode 5: Kill the Boy

0:00 (+3) Sansa Stark:

Sansa discovers that Theon Greyjoy is still alive as a broken and disfigured captive of Ramsay Bolton in Winterfell. (Politics - uncategorized)

submitted by moonbaseu92 (approved!)

Episode 6: Unbowed, Unbent, Unbroken

34:55 (+3) Areo Hotah:

Areo's Dornish guard wins the battle in the Water Gardens, arresting Bronn/Jaime and the Sand Snakes. (Politics - uncategorized)

45:36 (+3) Sansa Stark:

Sansa deduces that Myranda is Ramsay's lover. "And how long have you loved him, Myranda? Did you imagine that he would be with you forever, is that it?" (Politics - uncategorized)

50:05 (+3) Sansa Stark:

Sansa Stark and Ramsay Bolton are wed.
Roose Bolton: "Lady Sansa, will you take this man?"
Sansa: "I take this man." (Politics - uncategorized)

Episode 7: The Gift

10:01 (+3) Theon Greyjoy:

After promising to help Sansa Stark light a signal candle at the top of the broken tower, Reek instead goes directly to Ramsay Bolton to inform him of Sansa's plot. (Politics - uncategorized)

submitted by wpearsal (approved!)

It seemed like Ramsay was a little surprised when Theon showed up, and I had thought Theon just got busted and had to confess at that point. If Theon went straight to Ramsay with the intention of telling him about Sansa's plot though, I agree it would be a betrayal. I'll have to watch the scene again, but how did others interpret the scene? -nyan

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2015 May 26
Ramsay was not dining in the broken tower. They filmed it to make it appear as though Reek was going to the tower, but he wasn't. Nobody uses the tower. The top room is an attic-y thing, remember? That's where Bran caught Jaime and Cersei. So yeah, Reek deliberately betrayed Sansa. -alicehanners

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2015 May 27 moonbaseu92 likes this
Yeah @alicehanners and @wpearsal, you both are right. Totally misinterpreted the scene on my first watching. This will count as a betrayal. -nyan

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2015 May 27
Should he also get points for "betraying" the old lady? Although I'm not sure how he found out who the "friend" of Sansa was. Maybe credit to the show writers for that plot hole. -moonbaseu92

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2015 May 27
The old lady never trusted Reek, so it wouldn't count as a betrayal for her. -nyan

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2015 May 27

Episode 8: Hardhome

17:55 (+3) Sansa Stark:

Sansa forces out Reek's secret that Bran and Rickon Stark are still alive, and the charred bodies were only those of the farm boys. (Politics - uncategorized)

Episode 10: Mother's Mercy

7:35 (+3) Samwell Tarly:

Sam convinces Jon Snow to send him and Gilly to Oldtown so that Sam can train to be the next Maester for the Night's Watch. "If Gilly stays here, then she'll die. And the baby that she named after me will die. And I'll end up dying, too, trying to protect them. Which means that the last thing that I'll see in this world will be the look in her eyes when I fail them." (Politics - uncategorized)

18:40 (+3) Theon Greyjoy:

Theon finally breaks and betrays the Boltons, saving Sansa Stark from one of Myranda's arrows before throwing Myranda off the walls of Winterfell. (Politics - uncategorized)

28:42 (+3) Myrcella Baratheon:

Myrcella figures out the secret of her parentage before Jaime can tell her. "I know... about you and mother. I think a part of me always knew. And I'm glad. I'm glad that you're my father." (Politics - uncategorized)

submitted by coconnor723 (approved!)

Insults Delivered / Funny Lines

Episode 1: The Wars to Come

20:54 (+3) Samwell Tarly:

"How many Brothers can say that they've killed a White Walker *and* a Thenn? I might be the first in history!" (Funny Line)

This isn't an insult and I don't find it funny. Out of context, it's not funny, and in context, it shows Sam's laziness, where Gilly is in fairly constant danger, surrounded by men who hate her, but Sam doesn't want to train because he had a few lucky moments beyond the wall.

Is this category purely "made the scorekeeper laugh"? Gilly certainly didn't find it funny and it wasn't delivered as though it was humor. -alicehanners

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2015 Apr 19
I thought it was clearly meant to be humor. I think it was a "funny", although I didn't find it laugh out loud funny either. Also I don't think running a "is it funny out of context" test is very useful for judging something's funni'ness. Generally isn't comedy mostly about context? -moonbaseu92

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2015 Apr 20
I meant that it was LESS fun in context, but wasn't even funny out of context.

I don't know how you can think it's humor. It's Sam trying to puff up for Gilly as an excuse for why he isn't training. -alicehanners

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2015 Apr 20
It might be seen as delivered as humor if Sam was using it to jokingly poke fun at how useless he is otherwise (hey, remember those two times I ended up doing something right??), but you can tell he's genuinely proud of himself and thinks he can protect Gilly because of this.

Don't get me wrong, I'm a big fan of Sam, but this moment was sad and I felt bad for Gilly. Not humor at all. -alicehanners

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2015 Apr 20
The "context" for humor is that of the viewer - many jokes won't be funny at all to any characters in-universe, but the humor is meant for those *watching* the show. In this case, Sam isn't telling a joke and Gilly isn't perceiving it as a joke. But the viewer obviously sees through Samwell's weak attempt at a brag for what it is, and Samwell's vanity is the joke here. I agree that it's not the greatest laugh-out-loud moment in the show, but enough people wrote in suggesting this one that we added it. -nyan

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2015 Apr 21

Episode 2: The House of Black and White

40:42 (+3) Samwell Tarly:

"A wildling girl, a baby, and Lord Janos. I found him there (in the Castle Black pantry) after the battle was over, in a puddle of his own making." (Witty Insult)

Episode 5: Kill the Boy

0:00 (+3) Sansa Stark:

to Fat Walda Frey: "This isn't a strange place, this is my home. It's the people that are strange." (Witty Insult)

Episode 6: Unbowed, Unbent, Unbroken

34:47 (+3) Areo Hotah:

Areo puts his longaxe at Jaime Lannister's throat when he refuses to put down his sword.
"When you were whole, it would have been a good fight." (Threat)

Episode 7: The Gift

23:05 (+3) Samwell Tarly:

to Brant and Derek, who are assaulting Gilly: "I killed a White Walker. I killed a Thenn. I'll take my chances with you." (Threat)

24:11 (+3) Samwell Tarly:

Sam boasts about his command of the situation after he'd been beaten senseless by Brant and Derek of the Night's Watch.
Gilly: "I know they would've killed you if Ghost hadn't come."
Sam: "No no no, they were tiring out. I had them in the palm of my hand" (Funny Line)

submitted by wpearsal (approved!)

25:31 (+3) Samwell Tarly:

during his first sexual experience with Gilly: "Oh... oh... oh my..." (Funny Line)

submitted by wpearsal (approved!)

40:19 (+3) Nymeria Sand:

Bronn: "?...I've tasted the Dornishman's wife. ?"
Tyene Sand: *claps* "...he's got a good voice."
Nymeria: "We're lucky he's a singer. If he were a fighter, we might have been in trouble." (Witty Insult)

Episode 9: The Dance of Dragons

11:34 (+3) Myrcella Baratheon:

Myrcella fires back at Jaime about her acclimation to the weather and culture of Dorne.
Jaime: "What a lovely dress."
Myrcella: "You don't like it?"
Jaime: "You must be cold."
Myrcella: "Not at all. The Dornish climate agrees with me." (Funny Line)

15:02 (+3) Nymeria Sand:

Nymeria taunts her half-sister Tyene as she dominates her in the slapping game 17 times in a row.
"Why do we play? I'm better than you. I'll always... *slap* ...be better than you. Have I ever missed? Once? *slap* I don't think I have, I can't *slap* recall. You must love humiliation. *slap* Or pain. *slap* Which do you love most, humiliation or *slap* ...pain? That one hurt, didn't it? *slap*" (Witty Insult)

25:05 (+3) Jaqen H'ghar:

Arya Stark: "The thin man wasn't hungry today."
Jaqen: "Perhaps that is why a man is thin." (Funny Line)

Episode 10: Mother's Mercy

7:46 (+3) Samwell Tarly:

Jon Snow: "You know that the Citadel will make you swear off women, too."
Samwell: "Oh, they'll bloody try." (Funny Line)

Glasses of Wine Consumed

Episode 2: The House of Black and White

8:25 (+5) Sansa Stark:

Sansa has a taste of ale while dining with Littlefinger at the inn. "Don't see what all the fuss is about. Why do men love it so much?" (Glass of Wine Consumed)

Episode 10: Mother's Mercy

8:23 (+5) Samwell Tarly:

Jon and Sam toast to Sam's journey to Oldtown to become a Maester. "To your return." (Glass of Wine Consumed)

24:09 (+5) Jaqen H'ghar:

Jaqen drinks a glass of the poisoned liquid in the House of Black and White. (Glass of Wine Consumed)

Acts of Intercourse

Episode 6: Unbowed, Unbent, Unbroken

53:44 (+5) Sansa Stark:

Sansa is raped by Ramsay Bolton on their wedding night.
Ramsay: "Reek... I told you to watch. You've known Sansa since she was a girl. Now watch her become a woman." (Act of Intercourse)

Episode 7: The Gift

26:24 (+5) Samwell Tarly:

Samwell breaks his vows and lays with Gilly after he get injured. "Oh... oh... oh my." (Act of Intercourse)

Deaths

Episode 10: Mother's Mercy

24:15 (+10) Jaqen H'ghar:

Jaqen commits suicide to balance out Arya's killing of Meryn Trant. "A girl stole from the Many-Faced God. Now a debt is owed. Only death can pay for life." (Death)

29:49 (+10) Myrcella Baratheon:

Myrcella begins bleeding from the nose, and she dies in Jaime's arms aboard the ship bound for King's Landing. (Death)

Special

Episode 2: The House of Black and White

33:16 (+3) Samwell Tarly:

Sam mentions a factoid from his book on the history of Lord Commanders of the Night's Watch. "Did you know that the youngest Lord Commander in history, Osric Stark, was elected at the age of 10?" (Special)

45:16 (+3) Jaqen H'ghar:

Jaqen reveals himself to Arya, removing his disguise and inviting her into the House of Black and White. (Special)

Episode 3: The High Sparrow

17:15 (+3) Sansa Stark:

Sansa cries as she's told that Petyr Baelish has arranged a marriage for her to Roose Bolton's heir, Ramsay. A solitary tear is visible under her right eye. (Special)

Episode 4: The Sons of the Harpy

17:20 (+3) Samwell Tarly:

Samwell prepares a set of raven letters to various Lords requesting recruits for the Night's Watch. (Special)

Episode 5: Kill the Boy

6:55 (+3) Samwell Tarly:

Samwell reads a raven letter to Maester Aemon, reporting on Daenery's current struggles as ruler of Meereen. (Special)

30:52 (+3) Sansa Stark:

Sansa wipes a stream of tears from her left cheek after Ramsay rehashes the supposed deaths of Bran and Rickon Stark, and forces her and Reek to undergo an awkward apology. (Special)

35:13 (+3) Samwell Tarly:

Sam reads in the library of Castle Black while talking to Gilly. (Special)

Episode 7: The Gift

7:41 (+3) Theon Greyjoy:

to Sansa: "I'm not Theon, m'lady. I'm Reek." (Special)

8:39 (+3) Theon Greyjoy:

Sansa: "Promise me, Theon."
Reek: "Reek! My name is Reek." (Special)

16:32 (+3) Sansa Stark:

Sansa cries as Ramsay Bolton presents her with the flayed body of the old Winterfell woman who promised to help her. (Special)

Episode 8: Hardhome

16:20 (+3) Theon Greyjoy:

"I'm not Theon. There is no Theon. Reek." (Special)

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