Matchup: Matthew Is Coming vs United Under Unique Unics' Unit for Ep 8

The Game of Bones

Matthew Is Coming (matthewamonson)

Character	Drafted	Total	Politics	Deaths
Tommen Baratheon The King of the Seven Kingdoms after the assassination of his brother, Joffrey Baratheon. He is young and highly impressionable to the various influences in King's Landing that seek to control him.	#21	3	3	0
Benjen Stark First Ranger of the Night's Watch - in S1 he disappeared on a ranging north of the Wall and his whereabouts since then are unknown.	-	1	0	1
Bran Stark The fourth of the Stark children. A greenseer and a warg, Bran has mystical visions of the future and the ability to leap into the minds of others to control them - power he is only beginning to tap into. His journeys north of the Wall have recently led him to the cave of the Three-eyed Raven and the Children of the Forest.	#5	1	0	1
High Sparrow The leader of the Sparrows, a religious movement within the Faith of the Seven. After being appointed as High Septon by Cersei Lannister, he has lead a sweeping inquiry to root out moral corruption in King's Landing, imprisoning Loras Tyrell, Margaery Tyrell, and Cersei Lannister.	#20	0	0	0
White Walker (Night King) The leader of the White Walkers.	#28	0	0	0
Jon Snow The bastard son of Ned Stark, and the current Lord Commander of the Night's Watch. After guiding the Wildlings to safety in the aftermath of the Battle of Castle Black and the attack on Hardhome, he was betrayed by a mutiny of the Night's Watch, and left for dead in the snow.	#4	0	0	0
Ramsay Bolton The legitimized bastard son of Roose Bolton, now Warden of the North. He is fond of the Bolton tradition of flaying their enemies.	#13	0	0	0
Melisandre A Red Priestess from Asshai, Melisandre served as a close advisor to Stannis Baratheon until she abandoned his cause at the Battle of Winterfell against the Boltons.	#12	0	0	0
Totals		5	3	2

United Under Unique Unics' Unit (marcus.barkac)

Character	Drafted	Total	Insults	Wine	Deaths	Special
Tyrion Lannister The third, stunted dwarf of the Lannister children - a fugitive from Westeros after losing his trial for the murder of King Joffrey, he has escaped and found service as an advisor to Daenerys Targaryen.	#1	16	6	10	0	0
Cersei Lannister Queen Regent of the Seven Kingdoms and mother to King Tommen. Afflicted by a rare water allergy.	#8	8	3	5	0	0
Varys Formerly the Master of Whisperers in King's Landing, Varys controls a vast network of spies. After smuggling Tyrion Lannister to Essos, he reveals himself as a supporter of Daenerys Targaryen's claim to the Iron Throne. In Daenerys' absence, he serves with Tyrion Lannister and presides over the rule of Meereen.	#9	3	0	0	0	3
Alliser Thorne A former master-of-arms and acting Commander of the Night's Watch, Thorne narrowly lost the Lord Commander choosing to Jon Snow in S5. He later led a mutiny of disgruntled Night's Watch members against Jon Snow, stabbing and leaving him for dead.	#32	1	0	0	1	0
Jaqen H'ghar The leader of the Faceless Men of Braavos, and a skilled assassin. He trains Arya to become an assassin in the House of Black and White.	#25	0	0	0	0	0
Margaery Tyrell The wife of King Tommen Baratheon and Queen of the Seven Kingdoms. Her increasing influence over the young king have put at her odds against his mother, Cersei Lannister.	#24	0	0	0	0	0
Petyr Baelish (Littlefinger) Formerly the Master of Coin, Littlefinger is a conniving political mastermind and serves as Warden of the East after his behind-the-scenes assassination of Lisa Tully.	#16	0	0	0	0	0
Jorah Mormont The exiled head of House Mormont. Jorah was previously one of Daenerys Targaryen's most trusted advisors before his banishment. He returned to her service during a revolt in the fighting pits of Meereen, and now travels with Daario Naharis to rescue Daenerys, who has disappeared along with one of her dragons, Drogon.	#17	0	0	0	0	0
Totals		28	9	15	1	3

Political Wins

24:19 (+3) Tommen Baratheon:

Tommen issues a royal decree banning Trial by Combat. "Furthermore, after much prayer and reflection, the Crown has decided that from this day forward, trial by combat will be forbidden throughout the Seven Kingdoms. The tradition is a brutish one, a scheme devised by corrupt rulers in order to avoid true judgment from the Gods." (Executive Decision)

Insults Delivered / Funny Lines

9:57 (+3) Tyrion Lannister:

Varys: "If you shaved your beard with a straight razor, you'd say the razor worked. That doesn't mean it won't cut your throat."
Tyrion: "Spoken like a man who has never had to shave." (Witty Insult)

submitted by skywalkerdude (approved!)

10 more comments - see full thread

No, what Tyrion said was not a metaphor -alexanderdropkin

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2016 Jun 15
But it's also definitely isn't an insult. Why is pointing out that someone doesn't have to shave a witty insult? It seems neither witty nor insulting to me -cfitzgerald

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2016 Jun 15
It's basically another eunuch jab/reference, since you don't grow any hair if you're castrated before puberty. -nyan

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2016 Jun 15

12:53 (+3) Cersei Lannister:

Lancel Lannister: "Order your man (Gregor Clegane) to step aside, or there will be violence."
Cersei: "... I choose violence." (Threat)

This is certainly a threat on Lancel's part as well, is responding to a threat really a threat itself? -alicehanners

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2016 Jun 13 given.brian and jshragie like this
Lancel's line was an ordinary threat, Cersei's was a cold-blooded comeback. -nyan

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2016 Jun 13
Countering a threat with your own threat makes for more threats, as is just and true for Westeros. -dopeghoti

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2016 Jun 13 Ser Vincent likes this
Oh please, its only a cold-blooded comeback because it's Cersei. Lancel said "call him off or we will have to fight him." And she said "so fight him".

If his isn't a threat, hers definitely isn't. I think you are being way too personally subjective about threats -alicehanners

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2016 Jun 15 jedjackoway likes this
It feels like it hasn't been clear what the insults/threats/funny category is. It is never meant to score literally everything that can be construed as insulting/threatening, but is intended to reward the characters who are charismatic, and deliver the well-worded jabs.

Think about a rap battle. Literally every single line spoken by either participant is going to be "insulting". But only the best of those lines - insults with wit, cleverness, or highly-relevant comebacks - are the ones that illicit the "ooohs" and "BURNN!!" and "BAH GAWD that man had a FAMILY!" reactions from the audience. Those are the lines this category is trying to reward. -nyan

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2016 Jun 17
I think you can make a case for Cersei's line being below the bar - it's far from the best line in this episode (though I think there are wore ones, personally). But Lancel's line is an absolutely pedestrian threat, wording-wise, and does not fit into the purpose of this category. I cannot imagine a single viewer having a "Goddamnn I can't believe Lancel just said that" reaction to that scene. -nyan

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2016 Jun 17

26:24 (+3) Tyrion Lannister:

Missandei: "I have tried wine before. It made me feel funny."
Tyrion: "That's how you know it's working." (Funny Line)

Glasses of Wine Consumed

11:15 (+5) Cersei Lannister:

Cersei drinks in her chambers as Qyburn arrives to deliver a request from the Faith Militant. (Glass of Wine Consumed)

25:41 (+5) Tyrion Lannister:

Tyrion drinks in the Meereenese council room. (Glass of Wine Consumed)

27:23 (+5) Tyrion Lannister:

Tyrion refills and drinks while fantasizing about retirement as a winemaker. "One day, after our Queen has taken the Seven Kingdoms, I'd like to have my own vineyard. Make my own wine. The Imp's Delight. Only my close friends could drink it." (Glass of Wine Consumed)

Deaths

+1 for Benjen Stark, +1 for Bran Stark, +1 for Alliser Thorne

Special

9:57 (+3) Varys:

Varys: "If you shaved your beard with a straight razor, you'd say the razor worked. That doesn't mean it won't cut your throat."
Tyrion: "Spoken like a man who has never had to shave." (Special)

submitted by alexanderdropkin (approved!)

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