A Lannister Always Pays His Invoices
Game of Phones
Owner: jennwith2enns
64.5 roto pts (#3)
Z-Score:
0.548 (percentile: 70.8%)
Weeks at #1: 0
Categories won:
Insults Delivered / Funny Lines (87)
Best Week:
Episode 2: Stormborn
(+8 roto points)
Team MVP:
Tyrion Lannister
(picked #5,
109 points,
55.61% of team total)
Roster Stats
Roster
charId | Character | Special |
---|---|---|
17 |
Tyrion Lannister
Quick to wit and even quicker to the drink, Tyrion is the youngest of three Lannister children. After being exiled by his sister Cersei, he has joined with Daenerys Targaryen, serving as her Hand of the Queen and most trusted adviser.
|
* +1 point each time he is denied a drink * +1 point whenever he physically gives someone a coin (or other legal tender) |
23 |
Bronn
A former sellsword, who has risen through the ranks of nobility thanks to his fighting skills and work for the Lannisters. He has accompanied Jaime Lannister on his missions to Dorne and Riverrun.
|
+1 point when he gives expert critique/advice on fighting strategy |
27 |
Podrick Payne
A squire in the service of Brienne of Tarth. He previously served as Tyrion Lannister's squire.
|
+1 point for failed attempts at basic tasks. +1 point for surprising people with how good he is at a task |
84 |
Robin Arryn
The young, sickly son of the late Jon Arryn and Lysa Tully. He is Lord of the Vale, although he is easily manipualted by Lord Petyr Baelish, who serves as Lord Protector until he comes of age.
|
Gains points in the the Wine category for breastfeeding. +1 point when he mentions making something "fly". |
256 |
Robett Glover
The Head of House Glover, and bannerman to the Starks.
|
|
111 |
Bronze Yohn Royce
Head of House Royce, bannermen to House Arryn of the Vale.
|
|
104 |
Hot Pie
An orphan from King's Landing. He works at the Inn at the Crossroads as a baker.
|
+1 point for every baked good or other food he prepares |
154 |
Shagga
Leader of the Storm Crows, one of the hill tribes living in the west of the Vale.
|
Kills
Bronn unsheathes a sword out of the torso of an impaled, flailing Lannister soldier, inflicting the fatal damage on the way out.
(Kill of Unnamed Character)
Bronn runs through the chaos of the battlefield to make his way over to the Scorpion, cutting down two Dothraki screamers with the sword he takes from the torso of an impaled Lannister soldier.
(Kill of Unnamed Character)
Bronn blows away the Dothraki screamer with a bolt from the Scorpion.
(Kill of Named Character)
Political Wins
Hot Pie learns that Arya Stark is back in Westeros after recognizing her at the inn.
(Secret Discovery)
submitted by EvanWolfe (approved!)
10:18
(+3)
Tyrion Lannister:
Tyrion convinces Daenerys to follow Melisandre's proposal to ally with Jon Snow. "I can't speak to prophecies or visions in the flame... but I like Jon Snow, and I trusted him. And I am an excellent judge of character."
(Convincing Argument)
20:31
(+3)
Tyrion Lannister:
Tyrion's earlier advice wins over Daenerys, as she opts for a slower, more politically-calculated siege rather than the violent direct-assault on King's Landing advocated by her Westerosi allies. "I am not here to be Queen of the Ashes."
(Convincing Argument)
36:48
(+3)
Tyrion Lannister:
After Jon Snow resigns himself to giving up on an alliance with Daenerys and returning to the North empty-handed, Tyrion convinces him to stay and find a compromise deal, leading him to ask for the dragonglass.
Tyrion: "After a single meeting, it's not a reasonable thing to ask. So, do you have anything reasonable to ask?"
Jon: "What do you mean?"
Tyrion: "Maybe you are a Northern fool. I'm asking if there's something I can do to help you." (Convincing Argument)
Tyrion: "After a single meeting, it's not a reasonable thing to ask. So, do you have anything reasonable to ask?"
Jon: "What do you mean?"
Tyrion: "Maybe you are a Northern fool. I'm asking if there's something I can do to help you." (Convincing Argument)
38:53
(+3)
Tyrion Lannister:
Tyrion convinces Daenerys to give Jon Snow the dragonglass as a gesture of good faith with the North. "Let him mine the Dragonglass. If he's wrong, it's worthless. You didn't even know it was here. It's nothing to you. Give him something by giving him nothing. Take a step toward a more productive relationship with a possible ally."
(Convincing Argument)
Bronn arrives to the wagon and unveils the Scorpion, a high-powered dragon-killing ballista.
(New Weapon)
25:34
(+3)
Tyrion Lannister:
After the latest rejected plea by Jon Snow to get Daenerys to assist in the war with the White Walkers, Tyrion convinces the team on a different course to try to unite all three monarchs together:
Jon Snow: "We'll fight with the men we have. Unless you'll join us."
Daenerys: "And give the country to Cersei? As soon as I march away, she marches in."
Tyrion: "Perhaps not. Cersei thinks the Army of the Dead is nothing but a story made up by wet nurses to frighten children. What if we prove her wrong?
Jon: "I don't think she'll come see the dead at my invitation."
Tyrion: "So bring the dead to her." (Convincing Argument)
Jon Snow: "We'll fight with the men we have. Unless you'll join us."
Daenerys: "And give the country to Cersei? As soon as I march away, she marches in."
Tyrion: "Perhaps not. Cersei thinks the Army of the Dead is nothing but a story made up by wet nurses to frighten children. What if we prove her wrong?
Jon: "I don't think she'll come see the dead at my invitation."
Tyrion: "So bring the dead to her." (Convincing Argument)
Bronn finds Tyrion in the dungeons below the Red Keep, later arranging a secret meeting between him and Jaime.
(Secret Discovery)
submitted by hindsight44 (approved!)
41:13
(+3)
Tyrion Lannister:
After Tyrion and Jaime's secret meeting, Cersei agrees to the truce with Daenerys while they await for Jon to return with proof of the White Walker situation.
Cersei: "I've come to believe that an accommodation with the Dragon Queen could be in our immediate interest. She has the numbers. If we want to beat her, we have to be clever. We have to fight her like Father would have." (Deals Brokered)
Cersei: "I've come to believe that an accommodation with the Dragon Queen could be in our immediate interest. She has the numbers. If we want to beat her, we have to be clever. We have to fight her like Father would have." (Deals Brokered)
36:50
(+3)
Tyrion Lannister:
During their meeting in King's Landing, Tyrion deduces that Cersei is pregnant.
(Secret Discovery)
40:01
(+3)
Tyrion Lannister:
Tyrion's meeting with Cersei is succesful, convincing her to not only agree to the truce but to pledge her armies to march north to face the undead threat.
Cersei: "My armies will not stand down. I will not pull them back to the capital. I will march them north to fight alongside you in the Great War. The darkness is coming for us all. We'll face it together. And when the Great War is over, perhaps you'll remember I chose to help with no promises or assurances from any of you." (Convincing Argument)
Cersei: "My armies will not stand down. I will not pull them back to the capital. I will march them north to fight alongside you in the Great War. The darkness is coming for us all. We'll face it together. And when the Great War is over, perhaps you'll remember I chose to help with no promises or assurances from any of you." (Convincing Argument)
40:01
(+3)
Tyrion Lannister:
After a private meeting with Tyrion, Cersei agrees to a truce with the Targaryen and Northern forces so that they may collectively combat the White Walker threat, completing the deal brokered by Tyrion, Jaime, and Bronn's secret meeting.
(Deals Brokered)
submitted by nyan (approved!)
After a private meeting with Tyrion, Cersei agrees to a truce with the Targaryen and Northern forces so that they may collectively combat the White Walker threat, completing the deal brokered by Tyrion, Jaime, and Bronn's secret meeting.
(Deals Brokered)
submitted by nyan (approved!)
59:13
(+3)
Bronze Yohn Royce:
Royce rejects the command of Littlefinger, dooming him to Sansa's sentence in his 'trial' at the court of Winterfell.
Petyr Baelish: "I am Lord Protector of the Vale and I command you to escort me safely back to the Eyrie."
Yohn Royce: "I think not." (Act of Betrayal)
Petyr Baelish: "I am Lord Protector of the Vale and I command you to escort me safely back to the Eyrie."
Yohn Royce: "I think not." (Act of Betrayal)
submitted by brandonthebigB (approved!)
Insults Delivered / Funny Lines
10:18
(+3)
Tyrion Lannister:
Tyrion while convincing Daenerys to follow Melisandre's proposal to ally with Jon Snow. "I can't speak to prophecies or visions in the flame... but I like Jon Snow, and I trusted him. And I am an excellent judge of character."
(Funny Line)
0:00
(+3)
Tyrion Lannister:
calling back to Bronn's quote about the Eyrie: "Give me ten good men, and I'll impregnate the bitch"
(Funny Line)
submitted by hkeseyan (approved!)
34:07
(+3)
Tyrion Lannister:
to Jon Snow: "I came down here to brood over my failure to predict the Greyjoy attack. You're making it difficult. You look a lot better brooding than I do. You make me feel like I'm failing at brooding over failing."
(Funny Line)
35:40
(+3)
Tyrion Lannister:
"People's minds aren't made for problems that large. White Walkers, the Night King, Army of the Dead. It's almost a relief to confront a comfortable, familiar monster like my sister."
(Witty Insult)
37:50
(+3)
Tyrion Lannister:
Tyrion: "Apparently, it can be turned into weapons that kill white walkers and their foot soldiers. Or stop them. Destroy them. Unsure about the nomenclature."
(Funny Line)
38:14
(+3)
Tyrion Lannister:
Tyrion: "I'd very much like to believe that Jon Snow is wrong. But a wise man once said that you should never believe a thing simply because you want to believe it."
Daenerys: "Which wise man said this?"
Tyrion: "I don't remember."
Daenerys: "Are you trying to present your own statements as ancient wisdom?"
Tyrion: "I would never do that."
To you.
The reason I believe Jon Snow is because he's here. (Funny Line)
Daenerys: "Which wise man said this?"
Tyrion: "I don't remember."
Daenerys: "Are you trying to present your own statements as ancient wisdom?"
Tyrion: "I would never do that."
To you.
The reason I believe Jon Snow is because he's here. (Funny Line)
Jaime to Bronn: Besides think of the upkeep, the more you own the more it weighs you down.
Bronn To Jaime: Is that why you're so glum eh? All your new riches weighing you down? (Witty Insult)
Bronn To Jaime: Is that why you're so glum eh? All your new riches weighing you down? (Witty Insult)
submitted by hindsight44 (approved!)
to Jaime: "You've just won the biggest prize in the world, what do you possibly have to be upset about? C'mon you can tell me - the Queen of Thorns give you one last prick in the balls before saying goodbye?"
(Witty Insult)
27:05
(+3)
Tyrion Lannister:
Daenerys: "What kind of a Queen am I if I'm not willing to risk my life to fight them."
Tyrion: "A smart one." (Comeback)
Tyrion: "A smart one." (Comeback)
to Dickon Tarly: "Men shit themselves when they die, didn't they teach you that at fancy lad school?"
(Witty Insult)
to Jaime: "Listen to me, cunt. Until I get what I'm owed, a dragon doesn't get to kill you. You don't get to kill you. Only I get to kill you."
(Funny Line)
Jaime: "That was only one of them. She has two more. If she decides to use them, to really use them-"
Bronn: "You're fucked."
Jaime: "Don't you mean we're fucked?"
Bronn: "No, I do not." (Funny Line)
Bronn: "You're fucked."
Jaime: "Don't you mean we're fucked?"
Bronn: "No, I do not." (Funny Line)
Bronn: "Dragons are where our partnership ends. I'm not gonna be around when those things start spitting fire on King's Landing."
Jaime: "I have to tell Cersei."
Bronn: "May as well jump back in that river." (Funny Line)
Jaime: "I have to tell Cersei."
Bronn: "May as well jump back in that river." (Funny Line)
24:16
(+3)
Tyrion Lannister:
Tyrion: "Who's that (raven letter) for?"
Varys: "Jon Snow."
Tyrion: "Did you read it?"
Varys: "It's a sealed scroll for the King in the North."
...
Tyrion: "What's it say?" (Funny Line)
Varys: "Jon Snow."
Tyrion: "Did you read it?"
Varys: "It's a sealed scroll for the King in the North."
...
Tyrion: "What's it say?" (Funny Line)
submitted by nyan (approved!)
Jaime: "We don't have time for this, we should be preparing the city for a siege. The Dothraki are coming."
Bronn: "All the more reason for you to train. Unless you plan on fighting Dothraki twelve-year-olds." (Witty Insult)
Bronn: "All the more reason for you to train. Unless you plan on fighting Dothraki twelve-year-olds." (Witty Insult)
Jaime: "Why (do swordfight training) down here?"
Bronn: "I don't think you want people to see how you look swinging that thing yet." (Witty Insult)
Bronn: "I don't think you want people to see how you look swinging that thing yet." (Witty Insult)
32:52
(+3)
Tyrion Lannister:
Jaime: "I once told Bronn that if I ever saw you again, I'd cut you in half."
Tyrion: "...it'll take you a while with a sparring sword." (Funny Line)
Tyrion: "...it'll take you a while with a sparring sword." (Funny Line)
39:11
(+3)
Tyrion Lannister:
First Gold Cloak: "That dwarf..."
Second Gold Cloak: "Where'd you get that scar?"
Tyrion: "Fish hook. Some men you just can't teach." (Funny Line)
Second Gold Cloak: "Where'd you get that scar?"
Tyrion: "Fish hook. Some men you just can't teach." (Funny Line)
39:40
(+3)
Tyrion Lannister:
Davos introduces Tyrion to Gendry, who has just smashed in the heads of two investigating Gold Cloaks.
Davos: "This is Gendry."
Tyrion: "He'll do." (Funny Line)
Davos: "This is Gendry."
Tyrion: "He'll do." (Funny Line)
44:55
(+3)
Tyrion Lannister:
to Jorah Mormont: "You may not believe it, but I've missed you, Mormont. Nobody glowers quite like you. Not even Grey Worm."
(Witty Insult)
19:43
(+3)
Tyrion Lannister:
Daenerys: "Jon Snow is not in love with me."
Tyrion: "Oh, my mistake. I suppose he stares at you longingly because he's hopeful for a successful military alliance." (Funny Line)
Tyrion: "Oh, my mistake. I suppose he stares at you longingly because he's hopeful for a successful military alliance." (Funny Line)
Bronn and Jaime discuss the Unsullied army standing outside the gates of King's Landing.
Bronn: "Men without cocks. You wouldn't find me fighting in an army if I had no cock. What's left to fight for?"
Jaime: "Gold?"
Bronn: "I spent my life around soldiers. What do you think they spend that gold on?"
Jaime: "Family."
Bronn: "Not without a cock, you don't." (Funny Line)
Bronn: "Men without cocks. You wouldn't find me fighting in an army if I had no cock. What's left to fight for?"
Jaime: "Gold?"
Bronn: "I spent my life around soldiers. What do you think they spend that gold on?"
Jaime: "Family."
Bronn: "Not without a cock, you don't." (Funny Line)
Bronn breaks up the Podrick and Tyrion reunion
Podrick: "I never thought I'd see you again, my lord."
Tyrion: "Supporting the enemy, no less."
Podrick: "Hard to blame you."
Tyrion: 'Cersei will anyway."
Podrick: "I'm glad you're alive."
Bronn: "Come on. You can suck his magic cock later." (Witty Insult)
Podrick: "I never thought I'd see you again, my lord."
Tyrion: "Supporting the enemy, no less."
Podrick: "Hard to blame you."
Tyrion: 'Cersei will anyway."
Podrick: "I'm glad you're alive."
Bronn: "Come on. You can suck his magic cock later." (Witty Insult)
Tyrion Lannister: "Are you? Helping me to arrange this meeting wasn't exactly looking after yourself, was it? You put yourself at risk."
Bronn: "I put yourself at risk. Important difference. It's your head Queen Cersei's offered a bag of gold for, it's not mine. Now, thanks to me, she's got two traitors' heads coming right through her door. She can lop them both off as soon as she gets tired of the clever words that pour out their pieholes. All thanks to Ser Bronn of the fucking Blackwater. If that's not looking after myself, I don't know what is." (Threat)
Bronn: "I put yourself at risk. Important difference. It's your head Queen Cersei's offered a bag of gold for, it's not mine. Now, thanks to me, she's got two traitors' heads coming right through her door. She can lop them both off as soon as she gets tired of the clever words that pour out their pieholes. All thanks to Ser Bronn of the fucking Blackwater. If that's not looking after myself, I don't know what is." (Threat)
submitted by hindsight44 (approved!)
13:55
(+3)
Tyrion Lannister:
Sandor Clegane: "Am I going to die in this shit city?"
Tyrion Lanniser: "You might."
Sandor: "And this is all your idea. Seems every bad idea has some Lannister cunt behind it."
Tyrion: "And some Clegane cunt to help them see it through." (Witty Insult)
Tyrion Lanniser: "You might."
Sandor: "And this is all your idea. Seems every bad idea has some Lannister cunt behind it."
Tyrion: "And some Clegane cunt to help them see it through." (Witty Insult)
28:21
(+3)
Tyrion Lannister:
to Jon Snow: "I'm pleased you bent the knee to our Queen. I would have advised it, had you asked. But have you ever considered learning how to lie every now and then? Just a bit?!?"
(Witty Insult)
28:49
(+3)
Tyrion Lannister:
Jon: "Talk about my father if you want, tell me that's the attitude that got him killed. But when enough people make false promises, words stop meaning anything. Then there are no more answers, only better and better lies. And lies won't help us in this fight."
Tyrion: "That is indeed a problem. The more immediate problem is that we're fucked." (Funny Line)
Tyrion: "That is indeed a problem. The more immediate problem is that we're fucked." (Funny Line)
29:23
(+3)
Tyrion Lannister:
Jon Snow: "I did this. I should go."
Tyrion: "She'll definitely murder you." (Funny Line)
Tyrion: "She'll definitely murder you." (Funny Line)
32:02
(+3)
Tyrion Lannister:
Cersei: "I shouldn't be surprised, I suppose. She's your kind of woman: a foreign whore who doesn't know her place."
Tyrion: "A foreign whore you can't abduct, beat, or intimidate. That must be difficult for you." (Witty Insult)
Tyrion: "A foreign whore you can't abduct, beat, or intimidate. That must be difficult for you." (Witty Insult)
Glasses of Wine Consumed
23:03
(+5)
Tyrion Lannister:
Tyrion drinks while discussing the burning of the Tarlys with Varys.
(Glass of Wine Consumed)
24:11
(+5)
Tyrion Lannister:
Tyrion drinks from the refill after Varys finishes off the cup of wine he was originally drinking.
(Glass of Wine Consumed)
20:15
(+5)
Tyrion Lannister:
Tyrion drinks while talking with Daenerys in Dragonstone.
(Glass of Wine Consumed)
34:26
(+5)
Tyrion Lannister:
Tyrion pours himself a glass from Cersei's own wine stash after he survives his feigned plea that Cersei should have Gregor Clegane execute him.
(Glass of Wine Consumed)
35:24
(+5)
Tyrion Lannister:
After serving a refill of wine to Cersei, Tyrion pours another for himself and drinks.
(Glass of Wine Consumed)
Special
Arya meets Hot Pie at the Crossroads Inn, where he has baked up 4 on-screen pies: the Jorah special being eaten by two unnamed characters, Arya's pie, and two more left on the serving tray.
(Special)
Bronn: "Get back to King's Landing."
Jaime Lannister: "I'm not abandoning my army."
Bronn: "You're the commander, not a damn infantryman. Those fuckers are about to swamp us." (Special)
Jaime Lannister: "I'm not abandoning my army."
Bronn: "You're the commander, not a damn infantryman. Those fuckers are about to swamp us." (Special)
submitted by hindsight44 (approved!)
45:27
(+3)
Tyrion Lannister:
Tyrion hands the sentimental slaver's coin to Jorah, reminiscing briefly on their slave days in Meereen before Mormont leaves for Eastwatch.
(Special)
submitted by hkeseyan (approved!)
The Feels
20:20
(+0)
Podrick Payne:
While watching on as the living Stark children together in the courtyard of Winterfell:
Podrick: "Catelyn Stark would be proud. You've kept your vow."
Brienne: "I did next to nothing."
Podrick: "You're too hard on yourself, My Lady."
Brienne: "I'm not- ...thank you, Podrick." (Warm Fuzzy Moment)
Podrick: "Catelyn Stark would be proud. You've kept your vow."
Brienne: "I did next to nothing."
Podrick: "You're too hard on yourself, My Lady."
Brienne: "I'm not- ...thank you, Podrick." (Warm Fuzzy Moment)
45:28
(+0)
Tyrion Lannister:
Tyrion and Jorah share a brief reunion before Jorah sails off to the Wall on Jon's expedition to kidnap a wight..
Tyrion: "This is the coin the slaver gave me when I suggested he free us and pay us, remember?"
Jorah: "It was supposed to last us the rest of our lives."
Tyrion: "Take it with you. But bring it back. Our Queen needs you." (Warm Fuzzy Moment)
Tyrion: "This is the coin the slaver gave me when I suggested he free us and pay us, remember?"
Jorah: "It was supposed to last us the rest of our lives."
Tyrion: "Take it with you. But bring it back. Our Queen needs you." (Warm Fuzzy Moment)
34:54
(+0)
Tyrion Lannister:
After an intense conversation spilling out all of Tyrion's wrongs to their family, Cersei decides not to execute her brother after all this time. Relieved, Tyrion downs a glass of wine, and pours another for Cersei, reuniting them with the only familial bond more powerful than her incestual love for Jaime - alcoholism.
(Warm Fuzzy Moment)