Second Break(er of chains)fast

Dick Sausage

7-3, 26.5 roto pts (#1)
Z-Score: 1.075 (percentile: 85.9%)
Weeks at #1: 9
Categories won: Kills (673), Acts of Intercourse (35)
Best Week: Episode 2: Home (+6.5 roto points)
Team MVP: Cersei Lannister (picked #4, 665 points, 68.77% of team total)
Longest winstreak: W-3

Roster Stats

Character	Drafted	Total	Kills	Politics	Insults	Wine	Sex	Deaths	Special
Cersei Lannister Queen Regent of the Seven Kingdoms and mother to King Tommen. Afflicted by a rare water allergy.	#4	665	598	15	9	15	10	0	18
Ramsay Bolton The legitimized bastard son of Roose Bolton, now Warden of the North. He is fond of the Bolton tradition of flaying their enemies.	#5	106	52	18	12	5	5	11	3
Tormund Giantsbane A leader of the Wildlings, and formerly a trusted lieutenant and second-in-command to Mance Rayder, the King Beyond the Wall. Although they have met in battle more than once, he bears a grudging respect for Jon Snow.	#28	47	18	6	18	5	0	0	0
Bronn A former sellsword, who has risen through the ranks of nobility thanks to his fighting skills and work for the Lannisters. He recently accompanied Jaime Lannister on a sensitive diplomatic mission to Dorne to rescue the Princeess Myrcella Baratheon.	#21	47	0	0	33	5	0	0	9
Roose Bolton Lord of House Bolton, and Warden of the North after his betrayal of Robb Stark at the Red Wedding. He is the father of Ramsay Bolton, who is his legitimized bastard son.	#12	36	0	6	9	0	0	18	3
Melisandre A Red Priestess from Asshai, Melisandre served as a close advisor to Stannis Baratheon until she abandoned his cause at the Battle of Winterfell against the Boltons.	#13	29	0	6	3	0	20	0	0
Margaery Tyrell The wife of King Tommen Baratheon and Queen of the Seven Kingdoms. Her increasing influence over the young king have put at her odds against his mother, Cersei Lannister.	#20	19	0	9	0	0	0	10	0
Lancel Lannister A cousin to the Lannister children. In a past life he was a stuttering servant to King Robert Baratheon and secret consort to his cousin Queen Cersei Lannister. Lancel now serves as a leading member of the Sparrows, a dangerously militant religious group whose power over King's Landing is growing.	#29	18	5	3	0	0	0	10	0
Totals		967	673	63	84	30	35	49	33

Roster

charId	Character	Special
18	Cersei Lannister Queen Regent of the Seven Kingdoms and mother to King Tommen. Afflicted by a rare water allergy.	* +1 special point every time she pours wine or requests a glass be poured * +1 point when someone (excl. Jaime) references incest with Jaime or her childrens' bastardy directly to her * 2x multiplier for sex acts involving incest (first cousin or closer)
87	Ramsay Bolton The legitimized bastard son of Roose Bolton, now Warden of the North. He is fond of the Bolton tradition of flaying their enemies.	+1 for each food item he punctures or slices +1 point for every scene featuring an act of torture.
86	Roose Bolton Lord of House Bolton, and Warden of the North after his betrayal of Robb Stark at the Red Wedding. He is the father of Ramsay Bolton, who is his legitimized bastard son.	+1 politics point for lectures given to his son Ramsay
52	Melisandre A Red Priestess from Asshai, Melisandre served as a close advisor to Stannis Baratheon until she abandoned his cause at the Battle of Winterfell against the Boltons.	* +1 point for mentioning that "the night is dark and full of terrors" * +1 each time she mentions a vision she sees in the flames
57	Margaery Tyrell The wife of King Tommen Baratheon and Queen of the Seven Kingdoms. Her increasing influence over the young king have put at her odds against his mother, Cersei Lannister.	+1 point every time she interlocks arms with someone while walking.
23	Bronn A former sellsword, who has risen through the ranks of nobility thanks to his fighting skills and work for the Lannisters. He recently accompanied Jaime Lannister on a sensitive diplomatic mission to Dorne to rescue the Princeess Myrcella Baratheon.	+1 point when he gives expert critique/advice on fighting strategy
67	Tormund Giantsbane A leader of the Wildlings, and formerly a trusted lieutenant and second-in-command to Mance Rayder, the King Beyond the Wall. Although they have met in battle more than once, he bears a grudging respect for Jon Snow.	* every mention of "killing Crows" * every on-screen second he stares into Brienne's soul (rounded up)
26	Lancel Lannister A cousin to the Lannister children. In a past life he was a stuttering servant to King Robert Baratheon and secret consort to his cousin Queen Cersei Lannister. Lancel now serves as a leading member of the Sparrows, a dangerously militant religious group whose power over King's Landing is growing.	+1 politics point when he publicly outs a named character for their sins

Kills

Episode 2: Home

10:59 (+2) Tormund Giantsbane:

Tormund cuts down the first of Alliser Thorne's men who is foolish enough to charge at him. (Kill of Unnamed Character)

32:49 (+10) Ramsay Bolton:

Ramsay stabs his father Roose in the gut upon news that Fat Walda has borne Roose a second son. (Kill of Named Character)

37:07 (+10) Ramsay Bolton:

Ramsay offers up fresh meat to his hounds in the form of Fat Walda Frey. (Kill of Named Character)

37:07 (+2) Ramsay Bolton:

Ramsay offers up fresh meat to his hounds in the form of his newborn half-brother.
Fat Walda: "Please, Ramsay. He's your brother."
Ramsay: "I prefer being an only child." (Kill of Unnamed Character)

Sadly Roose didn't stick around long enough to give the baby a name. Ramsay needs to think long-term strategy if he's going for the fantasy point crown. -nyan

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2016 May 2 bookworm13457, tyler3005, kmgiorgio, jedjackoway, 3 others like this
I was up against a Ramsay this week so I was holding my breath hoping he wouldn't name the kid before killing him -bookworm13457

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2016 May 2 thederekwilson, 10100100101, nyan like this
His thirst for blood rivals his "mad dogs" -10100100101

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2016 May 2

Episode 4: Book of the Stranger

46:20 (+10) Ramsay Bolton:

Ramsay exposes his knowledge of Osha's loyalty to the Starks, stabbing her through the throat before she can assassinate him. (Kill of Named Character)

Episode 9: Battle of the Bastards

35:26 (+10) Ramsay Bolton:

Ramsay shoots down Rickon Stark with his longbow after giving him a chance to run to freedom towards the Stark army. "Do you like games, little man? Let's play a game. Run to your brother. The sooner you make it to him, the sooner you get to see him again. That's it. That's the game." (Kill of Named Character)

Rickon deserved what he got for not having the awareness to not run in a straight frelling line. -dopeghoti

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2016 Jun 21
Ramsay should also be given political points for this kill. Sansa even says it herself - "Rickon is Ned Stark's trueborn son, which makes him a greater threat to Ramsay than you, a bastard, or me, a girl." -ian.weinstein13

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2016 Jun 21 twalters likes this
Confirmed -> Ramsey is Jigsaw. Do you want to play a game? -jimwangerin

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2016 Jun 21 twalters and nyan like this
This is absolutely torture, Ramsay should get special points for this. -alicehanners

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2016 Jun 21 twalters, tevin, camille.dupont like this
run in a serpentine like pattern rickon! he did not -crisbell22

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2016 Jun 23

41:48 (+2) Tormund Giantsbane:

Tormund runs his sword through a Bolton soldier from behind, saving Jon Snow. (Kill of Unnamed Character)

43:51 (+2) Tormund Giantsbane:

As the Wildling fighters charge into the Bolton shield line, Tormund reaches in to pull a soldier out of the formation, stabbing him through the belly. (Kill of Unnamed Character)

44:33 (+2) Tormund Giantsbane:

Tormund grabs the shield-holder out of the Bolton formation and yanks him down into the mud, slashing him across the back. (Kill of Unnamed Character)

47:39 (+10) Tormund Giantsbane:

After sustaining several headbutts from Smalljon Umber while they are trapped in the moshpit of death, Tormund goes in for the kill, biting into the Smalljon's neck and ripping out his jugular. (Kill of Named Character)

51:31 (+10) Ramsay Bolton:

Ramsay fires the fatal arrow through the eye of Wun Weg Wun Dar Wun, killing the giant at last. (Kill of Named Character)

He was already pretty much dead, dunno if he should get credit? -xdwxrd

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2016 Jun 20
Pretty much dead != dead. Ramsay fired the final arrow the killed him. -twalters

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2016 Jun 20 jedjackoway, righteous, alexanderdropkin like this
Finishing blow gets all the XP and loot! Kill-stealing bastard. -nyan

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2016 Jun 20 mg.flanigan11, Lem Lemoncake, twalters, alexanderdropkin like this
Ramsay was on point with his last hits. Resurrection time? Deuce. -mg.flanigan11

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2016 Jun 20 twalters likes this
Poor giant. :( -xdwxrd

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2016 Jun 21 twalters likes this

Episode 10: The Winds of Winter

9:13 (+5) Lancel Lannister:

Lancel carves the seven-pointed star into Loras Tyrell's forehead after his confessions, as a symbol of Loras' sins and newfound faith in the Seven. (Major Injury of Named Character)

17:14 (+60) Cersei Lannister:

A candle burns down to ignite the cache of wildfire buried beneath the Sept of Baelor, creating a massive detonation that obliterates the Sept and the audience awaiting Cersei's Trial by Seven. The High Sparrow, Lancel Lannister, Kevan Lannister, Mace Tyrell, Loras Tyrell, and Margaery Tyrell perish as the wildfire explosion erupts through the floor of the Sept. (Kill of Named Character)

submitted by nyan (approved!)

115 more comments - see full thread

Part 2: So here's what we'll do.

Camp A will be a "default", as I think it's the general impression most viewers had on watching the scene, if they didn't dive into the nitty-gritty of scoring criteria. All of the leagues currently on Ruleset 3.1 and 4.0, Cersei will keep all the kill points.

For Camp B, all of the "reasonable split" scores will be added (Lem, Ramsay, Jordaario), under new Rulesets called 3.1b and 4.0b. These are the same as the existing Rulesets, just with these kill points added. Consider this a branch of the rules, enabling Leagues to self-determine which interpretation of the scoring criteria they want to apply.

I'll also be developing a new Ruleset 5.0 for the rewatches and S7 - it'll include the removal of commanded kills and the addition of some new political scoring categories to address some of the events that have felt like they weren't properly credited this season. The exact details need to be fine-tuned (the rewatches will be good practice), but ultimately it should address each of this season's controversial scores in a way that's unambiguous and properly rewarding for the magnitude of the characters' actions on the show.

At the end of this discussion, I personally fell into Camp C ("nothing counts"). However my read on that is that most players, in their gut, wanted the scoring to be Camp A or Camp B, but ended up supporting the strictness of Camp C because the other options create some hard-to-reconcile precedents. As a scorekeeper, there's some wariness that both Ruleset 4.0 and 4.0b will now be slightly broken in a "crap, this is going to be a mess for some future S7 events that I can imagine happening" sense.

The 5.0 revision of the rules should be the answer to that concern - we won't have to worry about these controversial 4.0/4.0b scores establishing bad precedents for future scoring, because we'll be using a completely new Ruleset 5.0 by then. In that sense, both of these bends for Camp A and Camp B might be considered do-right scores for the popular player sentiment on who deserves points, in a way that's safely not precedent-setting for the future Ruleset 5.0.

@jedjackoway and @bookworm13457 were the two main commenters that seemed to subscribe to Camp C without a personal leaning towards A or B. Hopefully your concerns were precedent-based like mine, and using A or B will be acceptable for your S6 scores (if not, I can always add in 3.1c/4.0c rulesets as well).

So in summary, this gives all leagues a Ruleset choice that fits with their preferred scoring style, and gives us a path forward to avoid this controversy in the future.

Hopefully this is a happy resolution for everyone playing this season. I'm off to count up some villagers and arrowed corpses. -nyan

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2016 Jul 1 bookworm13457, twalters, righteous like this
Thanks for all of your hard work @Nyan. I do not envy your task of counting the soldiers kill in the Battle of the Bastards. Looking forward to 1-2 more seasons of this! -bookworm13457

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2016 Jul 1 nyan, righteous, twalters, jedjackoway, 2 others like this
The above changes are now live! Check your league settings for the Ruleset 3.1b scoring option. (ended up skipping on 4.0b as it turns out hardly any leagues are on it - of the active commenters, only @Lem Lemoncake used it).

If you happen to be in a Public League and would like switch it do a different ruleset, just let me know directly on FB/email - I'll switch these with preference going to the desired Ruleset of players who have been active in the scoring discussions.

For those curious, here's are those 3.1b events (screenshots of the villagers count and every. freaking. arrow. death.):

Ramsay volleys (36 soldiers and horseys): http://fantasora.com/event/2927
Lem Lemoncloak's kill commands (32 villagers): http://fantasora.com/event/3056
Gatins 1/7th share of 32 villager kills: http://fantasora.com/event/3062
Qyburn 50% wildfire kills: http://fantasora.com/event/3067
Cersei 50% wildfire kills: http://fantasora.com/event/3066 -nyan

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2016 Jul 1 rajatnigam, bookworm13457, righteous, twalters like this

17:15 (+452) Cersei Lannister:

A candle burns down to ignite the cache of wildfire buried beneath the Sept of Baelor, creating a massive detonation that obliterates the Sept and the audience awaiting Cersei's Trial by Seven. Along with the High Sparrow, Small Council, and the Tyrell royal family, 226 other members of the audience perish as the wildfire explosion erupts through the floor of the Sept. (Kill of Unnamed Character)

I finally counted them all. Here's the wide shot! https://imgur.com/ft412aT -nyan

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2016 Jun 28
I'm keeping my arguments in the other thread for simplicity's sake. But why is this not going to Qyburn as well? -alicehanners

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2016 Jun 28
There's no confirmation that Qyburn did this however we do know that Cersei did. -klov3r

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2016 Jun 28
Just saw the "inside episodes 9&10" on HBO and they stated they used 287 extras for the scene. -alexander.hilton91

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2016 Jun 29 nyan and bookworm13457 like this
Stephanie on the FB page brought this up as well - I think we'll keep the criteria as just the on-screen body count, as it's easily scorable and we won't always have this kind of behind-the-scenes info available. -nyan

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2016 Jun 29

17:30 (+4) Cersei Lannister:

Two King's Landing pedestrians are consumed in the Sept of Baelor wildfire explosion. (Kill of Unnamed Character)

17:31 (+76) Cersei Lannister:

38 pedestrians in the square outside the Sept of Baelor are overrun as the explosion of wildfire spills outward onto the streets of King's Landing. (Kill of Unnamed Character)

17:36 (+6) Cersei Lannister:

A King's Landing pedestrian is crushed by a bell jettisoned from the explosion at the Sept of Baelor. Two other pedestrians are also destroyed as the alley becomes engulfed in wildfire. (Kill of Unnamed Character)

Political Wins

Episode 2: Home

10:12 (+3) Tormund Giantsbane:

Tormund successfully leads the Wildlings to victory at Castle Black, after Ser Alliser Thorne and his men throw down their weapons after a display of Wun Wun's force. (Victorious Battle)

submitted by nyan (approved!)

30:43 (+3) Roose Bolton:

Roose chastises Ramsay after his attempts to locate Sansa Stark fail.
Roose: "Half a dozen men. Your best hunters."
Ramsay: "They obviously had help."
Roose: "I didn't think Lady Sansa killed them all by herself." (Politics Special)

32:08 (+3) Roose Bolton:

Roose gains a second son. "My Lords, Lady Walda has given birth. A boy. Red-cheeked and healthy." (New Follower/Prisoner)

32:49 (+3) Ramsay Bolton:

Ramsay stabs his father Roose in the gut upon news that Fat Walda has borne Roose a second son.
Roose: "You'll always be my first born."
Ramsay: "Thank you for saying that. It means a great deal to me." (Act of Betrayal)

35:30 (+3) Ramsay Bolton:

Ramsay leads Fat Walda Frey and his newborn half-brother to a kennel full of his hungry hounds instead of to Lord Bolton. "Of course. Follow me mother." (Act of Betrayal)

36:13 (+3) Ramsay Bolton:

Ramsay becomes the new Lord Bolton after killing his father, Roose.
Fat Walda Frey: "Where is Lord Bolton?"
Ramsay: "I am Lord Bolton." (New Title)

52:16 (+3) Melisandre:

Melisandre invokes her pleas to the Lord of Light in an attempt to resurrect Jon Snow. After several minutes and of killing the hopes of everyone in the room, Jon is left alone and suddenly awakes, gasping for breath. God damn lag. (New Follower/Prisoner)

submitted by jfarmz (approved!)

23 more comments - see full thread

There's a lot of other good discussion around bigger wholesale changes to the rule. As I said before, it's too unfair to existing players who made draft decisions based on rules at the beginning of the season. We'll incorporate these suggestions into a new ruleset, which league admins will be able to opt into. We'll have more discussion for that and announce a final set of changed closer to midseason. -nyan

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2016 May 3 nsimmonds likes this
Pretty retarded that she gets 2 points less for bringing, arguably, the most important character in the show back from the dead than Thyrion gets for filling his glass with wine.
As for the people that "made draft decisions based on rules at the beginning", I think these people would be much more supportive of awarding over 3 points to Melisandre for her mitzvah than to awarding some weak prince 99 points for walking around. -jshragie

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2016 May 3 righteous likes this
ooohhhh salty. Honestly, as someone who drafted Mel, I think it'd be pretty unfair to give her anything more than maybe 5 here. 3 seems fine. -nsimmonds

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2016 May 4 alicehanners and moonbaseu92 like this

Episode 3: Oathbreaker

45:30 (+6) Ramsay Bolton:

Ramsay takes Osha and Rickon Stark as prisoners, after they are turned over to him by Smalljon Umber. (New Follower/Prisoner)

Episode 4: Book of the Stranger

39:52 (+3) Cersei Lannister:

Despite their initial protests, Cersei convinces the Hand of the King Kevan Lannister and Olenna Tyrell to go with her plan to march the Tyrell army into King's Landing to arrest the High Sparrow and rescue Queen Margaery.
Kevan Lannister: "We'll have civil war. Many will die."
Olenna Tyrell: "Many will die no matter what we do. Better them than us." (Convincing Argument)

No Jaime points for this? I took it as he convinces Kevan. "We're you commanded not to stand down?", "Do you think Tommen will complain when he has his wife back by his side? " etc -taylorreneegoodrich

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2016 May 16 thederekwilson, coconnor723, mariahwestfall3 like this
Yeah, this was clearly a tag team effort. -nsimmonds

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2016 May 16 nyan likes this
Jaime's points have been proposed here: http://fantasora.com/event/2388 -nyan

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2016 May 16

Episode 6: Blood of My Blood

36:25 (+3) Margaery Tyrell:

Margaery successfully convinces Tommen to accept the Lord and Saviour High Sparrow into his heart.
High Sparrow: "Queen Margaery has already atoned for her sins by bringing another into the true light of the Seven." (Convincing Argument)

42:26 (+3) Cersei Lannister:

Cersei convinces Jaime to accept Tommen's assignment to lead the Lannister army to assist Walder Frey in taking back Riverrun.

"Stand at the head of our army where you belong, where Father wanted you. Show our men where their loyalties belong. Show them what Lannisters are, what we do to our enemies. And take that stupid little castle back because it's ours and because you can." (Convincing Argument)

Episode 7: The Broken Man

11:14 (+3) Margaery Tyrell:

Instead of bringing Olenna Tyrell in to repent for her sins, as she had promised the High Sparrow, Margaery secretly tips off her grandmother of her imminent danger in King's Landing, convincing her to leave the city. (Act of Betrayal)

submitted by lize1017 (approved!)

11:16 (+3) Margaery Tyrell:

Margaery convinces her grandmother Olenna to leave King's Landing for her own safety: "Go home. Find comfort in prayer and good works. The Mother watches over us all." (Convincing Argument)

13:39 (+3) Tormund Giantsbane:

Tormund convinces the other Wildlings to march for Jon Snow. "The Crows killed him, because he spoke for the Free Folk when no other Southerners would. He died for us. If we are not willing to do the same for him, we're cowards. If that's what we are, we deserve to be the last of the Free Folk." (Convincing Argument)

Episode 9: Battle of the Bastards

44:42 (+3) Ramsay Bolton:

Ramsay's forces successfully surround the Stark army, trapping them between a shield-and-spear formation of Bolton soldiers, and a huge mound of corpses defended by Umber and Karstark forces. (Victorious Battle)

Episode 10: The Winds of Winter

17:02 (+3) Lancel Lannister:

Lancel follows one of Qyburn's little birds to the King's Landing underground. There he is stabbed, but crawls to discover the hidden cache of wildfire buried beneath the Sept of Baelor. (Secret Discovery)

submitted by nyan (approved!)

Seems like the little birds quite deliberately led Lancel there to show him, disqualifying it from the secret discovery. -nyan

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2016 Jun 27 dopeghoti likes this
I think the little birds brought him down there to stab him, not necessarily to show him. They stabbed him in the hall, and then he somehow stumbled upon the cache of wildfire, and tried to blow it out. So I feel they are independent events. -skywalkerdude

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2016 Jun 27 nyan, righteous, alicehanners like this
I didn't think they led him their deliberately. Why would they do that? Led or not led, still discovered a 'secret', yah. -xdwxrd

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2016 Jun 28 righteous likes this
REgardless of the scoring, can I say that I thought that was tacky and terrible television. That Lancel would swerve from his mission to get Cersei because, what, he saw a little kid? Are there no little kids in KL? Then, he gets stabbed and suddenly loses use of both of his legs? Did the kid stab him in the spine and paralyze him? wat
-alicehanners

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2016 Jun 28 nyan and righteous like this
Read this somewhere and this makes the most sense to me:

The little bird was spying on the trial and was running away to give information to Cersei about what had happened. He happened to be followed by Lancel, so the little bird hid, stabbed Lancel when he had the chance, and then took off. I think it should count as a secret discovery -wynnch

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2016 Jun 29

17:18 (+3) Cersei Lannister:

Cersei destroys the Sept of Baelor in an explosion of wildfire, killing most of the Tyrell royal family and the King's Small Council. (Act of Betrayal)

Eh, really? She all but declared herself accountable to no one when talking to Grandma Tyrell.
-alicehanners

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2016 Jun 28
One of the conditions of her release from imprisonment was that she would stand trial later. Though she swore that she would she decided to skip her court date to watch some fireworks. -jimwangerin

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2016 Jun 28
It seemed like Cersei and the Small Council had reached a sort of detente when we last left off, after they agreed on Jaime's plan to march the Tyrell army in. Maybe they didn't trust her 100%, but certainly none of them expected she would outright murder them. -nyan

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2016 Jun 28 alexanderdropkin likes this

18:22 (+3) Cersei Lannister:

Cersei takes Septa Unella prisoner, tying her down to a table as she tortures her. "Confess. It felt good. Beating me, starving me, frightening me, humiliating me. You didn't do it because you cared about my atonement. You did it because it felt good. ... I killed your High Sparrow, and all his little sparrows ... because it felt good to watch them burn. It felt good to imagine their shock and their pain. No thought has ever given me greater joy." (New Follower/Prisoner)

34:57 (+3) Melisandre:

Melisandre admits to sacrificing Shireen after being exposed by Davos Seaworth, but manages to convince Jon Snow to spare her in the face of the looming White Walker threat.

Melisandre: "I've been ready to die for many years. If the Lord was done with me, so be it, but he's not. You've seen the Night King, Jon Snow. You know the great war is still to come. You know the army of the dead will be upon us soon. And you know I can help you win that war."
Jon Snow: "Ride south today. If you return to the North, I'll have you hanged as a murderer." (Convincing Argument)

submitted by mg.flanigan11 (approved!)

10 more comments - see full thread

I would say survival in that circumstance is evidence of a convincing argument. She had just confessed to murder yet sh's being set free. We'd have to look at the severity of the crime. If you were accused of murder in front of the Sheriff and you confess, but then argue of your use in the world and your spared the penalty of murder, I'd say your argument was convincing. Jon seals the deal on this one when he threatens that he'll "have her hanged for murder" if she returns. That means he's knowingly releasing a murderer. -mg.flanigan11

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2016 Jun 28
I don't think it's clear enough that she convinced Jon to do one thing or another. All we have on Jon's position is "Do you have anything to say for yourself?" which could be considered like a "any last words?" question, but it's just totally apparent what he initially had in mind. -alexanderdropkin

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2016 Jun 29
With all that we know about Jon Snow, I don't think that there was any doubt that he would have had her killed had she not convinced him otherwise. He executed Janos Slynt for disobeying a direct order from the Lord Commander. Considering Melisandre admitted to burning an innocent girl alive, there is no way his default decision wouldn't have been to kill her. But she managed to convince him to not kill her, so I think she should definitely be rewarded points-wise for still being alive even if she was exiled. I don't think we have a prescedent that a character needs to get everything they're arguing for to get the points, so I think successfully convincing Jon to let her live is good enough for points -cfitzgerald

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2016 Jun 29

63:11 (+3) Cersei Lannister:

Qyburn: "I now proclaim Cersei of the House Lannister, First of Her Name, Queen of the Andals and the First Men, Protector of the Seven Kingdoms. Long may she reign." (New Title)

Insults Delivered / Funny Lines

Episode 1: The Red Woman

12:00 (+3) Roose Bolton:

to Ramsay: "Without Sansa, you won't be able to produce an heir. And without an heir, well... let's hope the Maesters are right and Lady Walda's carrying a boy." (Threat)

submitted by moonbaseu92 (approved!)

Episode 2: Home

11:48 (+3) Tormund Giantsbane:

Alliser Thorne: "For thousands of years, the Night's Watch has held Castle Black against the Wildlings."
Tormund: "Until you." (Witty Insult)

29:03 (+3) Roose Bolton:

Ramsay: "They obviously had help."
Roose: "I didn't think Lady Sansa killed them all by herself." (Funny Line)

submitted by Reaper (approved!)

31:58 (+3) Roose Bolton:

to Ramsay: "If you acquire a reputation as a mad dog, you will be treated as a mad dog. Taken out back and slaughtered for pigfeed." (Threat)

36:46 (+3) Ramsay Bolton:

Ramsay rejects Fat Walda Frey's please for her son's life.
Fat Walda: "Please, Ramsay. He's your brother."
Ramsay: "I prefer being an only child." (Threat)

Is this really a threat? This seems like a very explicit "I'm going to kill you guys now."

Would a character saying "now, die!" while delivering a killing blow count as a threat? This feels like that to me. -jedjackoway

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2016 May 2 Lem Lemoncake, bookworm13457, moonbaseu92 like this
"Now, die!", "You're an idiot", or other plainly-spoken lines aren't good enough for this category. I think "I prefer being an only child" is not quite as literal/plain as any of those examples - it's like a trivialization of Fat Walda's pleas for her sons life that shows how coldly sociopathic Ramsay is (his simple *preference* outweighs the life of a baby). But beyond wether the line is literal or plain, we'll certainly listen to feedback on whether a line passes the subjective quality bar. -nyan

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2016 May 2
If it doesn't count as a threat it should count as wit. -nsimmonds

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2016 May 2 10100100101 likes this
I think that makes sense. From that definition of threat, this seems legit. -jedjackoway

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2016 May 3

Episode 3: Oathbreaker

6:43 (+3) Tormund Giantsbane:

Tormund: "The think you're some kind of God, the man who returned from the dead."
Jon Snow: "I'm not a god."
Tormund: "I know that. I saw your pecker. What kind of God would have a pecker that small? (Witty Insult)

44:55 (+3) Ramsay Bolton:

Smalljon Umber: "Fuck kneeling, and fuck oaths. I've got a gift for you."
Ramsay: "A girl, I hope. I prefer redheads." (Funny Line)

Episode 4: Book of the Stranger

48:47 (+3) Ramsay Bolton:

Ramsay sends a letter to Jon Snow, demanding Sansa back:

"Keep her from me and I will ride north and slaughter every wildling man, woman, and babe living under your protection. You will watch as I skin them living. You will watch as my soldiers take turns raping your sister. You will watch as my dogs devour your wild little brother. Then I will spoon your eyes from their sockets and let my dogs do the rest. Come and see." (Threat)

submitted by elise.gwen.morgan (approved!)

11 more comments - see full thread

The letter should definitely count. But it should count once, since that Khal threatening Dany to suffer various rapes counts once as well. -Lem Lemoncake

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2016 May 16 as38 likes this
I don't know, Ramsay definitely threatened each character uniquely. Khal Moro was threatening the same person with the same act, but multiple times. I don't think that's equivalent. -theripleymanor

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2016 May 17
It seems like it could be summed up as ultimately a threat to Jon. "You will watch as... [terrible stuff happens to Sansa]. You will watch as... [terrible stuff happens to Rickon]. Then I will spoon your eyes from their sockets..." The threat is the emotional torture that he will put Jon through after he's defeated. -nyan

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2016 May 17

Episode 7: The Broken Man

15:00 (+3) Tormund Giantsbane:

Jon Snow: "Are you sure they'll come (the Wildling armies)?"
Tormund: "We're not clever like you Southerners. When we say we'll do something, we do it." (Witty Insult)

18:25 (+3) Bronn:

Bronn: "Oh no, not me. I'm just an upjump sellsword."
Jaime: "You're an anointed knight, there's quite a difference."
Bronn: "Aye, knights don't get paid." (Funny Line)

18:33 (+3) Bronn:

Jaime: "You have better instincts than any officer in the Lannister army."
Bronn: "That's like saying I have a bigger cock than anyone in the Unsullied army." (Witty Insult)

18:57 (+3) Bronn:

Jaime: "And you'll get all three. A Lannister always pa-"
Bronn: "Don't say it. Don't fookin' say it..." (Funny Line)

submitted by nyan (approved!)

21:03 (+3) Bronn:

Lothar Frey: "Ser Jaime, we didn't know you were coming."
Jaime Lannister: "Because you didn't set a proper perimeter."
Bronn: "Good thing we're friends, or we'd be fucking you in the ass right now." (Witty Insult)

submitted by nyan (approved!)

22:22 (+3) Bronn:

Jaime: "Get word to the Blackfish. I want a parley."
Bronn: "A parley or a fight?"
Jaime: "He's an old man."
Bronn: "You've got one hand. My money's on the old boy." (Witty Insult)

Episode 8: No One

12:53 (+3) Cersei Lannister:

Lancel Lannister: "Order your man (Gregor Clegane) to step aside, or there will be violence."
Cersei: "... I choose violence." (Threat)

This is certainly a threat on Lancel's part as well, is responding to a threat really a threat itself? -alicehanners

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2016 Jun 13 given.brian and jshragie like this
Lancel's line was an ordinary threat, Cersei's was a cold-blooded comeback. -nyan

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2016 Jun 13
Countering a threat with your own threat makes for more threats, as is just and true for Westeros. -dopeghoti

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2016 Jun 13 Ser Vincent likes this
Oh please, its only a cold-blooded comeback because it's Cersei. Lancel said "call him off or we will have to fight him." And she said "so fight him".

If his isn't a threat, hers definitely isn't. I think you are being way too personally subjective about threats -alicehanners

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2016 Jun 15 jedjackoway likes this
It feels like it hasn't been clear what the insults/threats/funny category is. It is never meant to score literally everything that can be construed as insulting/threatening, but is intended to reward the characters who are charismatic, and deliver the well-worded jabs.

Think about a rap battle. Literally every single line spoken by either participant is going to be "insulting". But only the best of those lines - insults with wit, cleverness, or highly-relevant comebacks - are the ones that illicit the "ooohs" and "BURNN!!" and "BAH GAWD that man had a FAMILY!" reactions from the audience. Those are the lines this category is trying to reward. -nyan

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2016 Jun 17
I think you can make a case for Cersei's line being below the bar - it's far from the best line in this episode (though I think there are wore ones, personally). But Lancel's line is an absolutely pedestrian threat, wording-wise, and does not fit into the purpose of this category. I cannot imagine a single viewer having a "Goddamnn I can't believe Lancel just said that" reaction to that scene. -nyan

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2016 Jun 17

14:47 (+3) Bronn:

greeting Podrick Payne: "Gettin' a bit old to be a squire, aren't we?" (Witty Insult)

15:03 (+3) Bronn:

Bronn: "Are they in there?"
Podrick Payne: "Uh huh."
Bronn: "You think they're fucking?"
Podrick: "What? No."
Bronn: "Why not? I'd fuck her. You'd fuck her, wouldn't you?"
Podrick: "I'm her squire."
Bronn: "Oh." (Funny Line)

15:28 (+3) Bronn:

on Jaime Lannister: "The way all women look at him is frankly irritating. I preferred working with the little brother on that account." (Funny Line)

Episode 9: Battle of the Bastards

0:00 (+3) Ramsay Bolton:

to Jon Snow and his men: "My dogs are desperate to meet you. I haven't fed them for seven days. They're ravenous. I wonder which parts they'll try first. Your eyes? Your balls? We'll find out soon enough. In the morning, then, bastard." (Threat)

submitted by wpearsal (approved!)

16:29 (+3) Tormund Giantsbane:

Jon Snow: "We're digging trenches all along our flanks. They won't be able to hit us the way that Stannis hit you, in a double envelopment."
Tormund: ...
Jon: "A pincer move."
Tormund: ...
Jon: "They won't be able to hit us from the sides."
Tormund: "Good." (Funny Line)

21:58 (+3) Tormund Giantsbane:

to Davos: "I have a jug of sour goat's milk stronger than any of that grape water you southern twats like sucking on." (Witty Insult)

22:23 (+3) Tormund Giantsbane:

Davos: "I can never sleep the night before a battle."
Tormund: "So what do you do all night?"
Davos: "I walk. Think and walk. Think and walk until I'm far enough away from camp that no one can hear me shitting my guts out."
Tormund: *laughs* "... Happy shitting." (Funny Line)

22:52 (+3) Melisandre:

Jon Snow: "Any advice?"
Melisandre: "Don't lose." (Funny Line)

submitted by mg.flanigan11 (approved!)

This shoupdate be split into two differnt posts, or counted twice as these are two differnt lines. -cmwalken15

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2016 Jun 21
Doesn't fall in any category -becharafayad1997

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2016 Jun 21 alexanderdropkin and twalters like this
I think she said "Don't lose," and it was funny in the same way that one line of hers was, before the took off the ruby. I forget the line, but remember it was deadpan and similar humor, and she got points for it.
-alicehanners

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2016 Jun 21 taylorreneegoodrich and mg.flanigan11 like this
dead pan humor is most certainly funny and in the right catagory. -cmwalken15

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2016 Jun 21 taylorreneegoodrich, dopeghoti, mg.flanigan11 like this

Episode 10: The Winds of Winter

0:00 (+3) Bronn:

to Jaime: "She doesn't want me, she wants your golden fingers up her twat." (Funny Line)

submitted by axhandle (approved!)

21:10 (+3) Cersei Lannister:

to Septa Unella: "This is Ser Gregor Clegane. He's quiet, too. Your Gods have forsaken you. This is your god now."
(Threat)

Is this really a threat, she's kinda just telling her whats up, not threatening something will happen if something else happens. -xdwxrd

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2016 Jun 28 alicehanners likes this
Just 'cause it's flowery doesn't make this a good threat.
-alicehanners

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2016 Jun 28 alexanderdropkin and jedjackoway like this
If I was strapped to a board, and Cersei introduced her giant of a bodyguard to me as my "new god", I'd feel pretty threatened. -marcelcdn

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2016 Jun 28 nyan, bookworm13457, wynnch, kayeexau like this
I feel threatened by a lot of things all the time. Doesn't mean they threatened me. -xdwxrd

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2016 Jun 29

21:49 (+3) Cersei Lannister:

as she locks Septa Unella in with Gregor Clegane: "Shame. Shame. Shame." (Witty Insult)

23:47 (+3) Bronn:

to Jaime, after a Frey serving girl gives him the eye: "You don't even have to do anything, do you?" (Funny Line)

24:07 (+3) Bronn:

Jaime Lannister: "Those two have their eyes on you."
Bronn: "They have their eyes on *you*, cunt."
Jaime: "Not my type."
Bronn: "Not blonde enough?" (Witty Insult)

Glasses of Wine Consumed

Episode 2: Home

19:25 (+5) Cersei Lannister:

Cersei takes a sip while speaking with her son Tommen. (Glass of Wine Consumed)

submitted by rwrigley86 (approved!)

Episode 3: Oathbreaker

43:07 (+5) Ramsay Bolton:

Ramsay drinks while hearing a proposal from Smalljon Umber (Glass of Wine Consumed)

Episode 4: Book of the Stranger

48:01 (+5) Tormund Giantsbane:

Tormund drinks from his mug as Jon Snow unrolls the letter from Ramsay Bolton. (Glass of Wine Consumed)

Episode 8: No One

11:15 (+5) Cersei Lannister:

Cersei drinks in her chambers as Qyburn arrives to deliver a request from the Faith Militant. (Glass of Wine Consumed)

Episode 10: The Winds of Winter

17:51 (+5) Cersei Lannister:

Cersei drinks as she watches the wildfire explosion engulf the Sept of Baelor from the safety of her chambers in the Red Keep. (Glass of Wine Consumed)

23:54 (+5) Bronn:

Bronn drinks at the Frey-Lannister feast celebrating the retaking of Riverrun. (Glass of Wine Consumed)

Acts of Intercourse

Episode 1: The Red Woman

46:53 (+20) Melisandre:

Melisandre removes her ruby necklace as she strips down to her true form in front of the mirror. (Non-sexual Nude Scene)

Episode 4: Book of the Stranger

45:55 (+5) Ramsay Bolton:

Ramsay gets a handy prelude from Osha, before surprising her with some intense penetration. (Act of Intercourse)

submitted by cjcookart (approved!)

Episode 6: Blood of My Blood

43:08 (+10) Cersei Lannister:

Cersei and Jaime get it on after hot and heavy dirty talk about the power of House Lannister and destroying their enemies. "They've made us both stronger, all of them. They have no idea how strong we are. No idea what we're going to do to them. We've always been together. We'll always be together." (Act of Intercourse)

Deaths

Episode 2: Home

33:05 (+10) Roose Bolton:

Roose is stabbed in the gut by his son Ramsay after news arrived that Fat Walda has given birth to a second son for Roose.
Roose: "You'll always be my first born."
Ramsay: "Thank you for saying that. It means a great deal to me." (Death)

Episode 3: Oathbreaker

+1 for Roose Bolton

Episode 4: Book of the Stranger

+1 for Roose Bolton

Episode 5: The Door

+1 for Roose Bolton

Episode 6: Blood of My Blood

+1 for Roose Bolton

Episode 7: The Broken Man

+1 for Roose Bolton

Episode 8: No One

+1 for Roose Bolton

Episode 9: Battle of the Bastards

57:53 (+10) Ramsay Bolton:

Ramsay is eaten alive by his own hounds after he is imprisoned with them in the kennels of Winterfell. (Death)

+1 for Roose Bolton

Episode 10: The Winds of Winter

17:17 (+10) Lancel Lannister:

Lancel Lannister is lured into the King's Landing underground where he is stabbed by one of Qyburn's little birds. Finding a cache of wildfire, he is too late to stop the candles from burning down and igniting it, engulfing him in the explosion. (Death)

17:27 (+10) Margaery Tyrell:

Margaery Tyrell is engulfed as the wildfire explosion rips through the Sept of Baelor, destroying the entire section of King's Landing and killing all those inside. (Death)

+1 for Roose Bolton, +1 for Ramsay Bolton

Special

Episode 1: The Red Woman

11:11 (+3) Roose Bolton:

Roose gives Ramsay a lecture that it is marriages and political acumen that establish dynasties, not winning on the battlefield.

"Do you feel like a victor? I rebelled against the crown to arrange your marriage to Sansa Stark. Do you think that burning wagons in the night and mowing down tired, outnumbered Baratheons is the same as facing a prepared and provisioned Lannister army?" (Special)

22:29 (+3) Cersei Lannister:

Jaime refers to Myrcella's parentage as Cersei grives: "Listen- listen to me. She was my daughter and I failed her." (Special)

I feel like Jamie should have gotten points for this scene too, they were grieving parents together, clearly referring to their children, and what was taken from them. -taylorreneegoodrich

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2016 May 2
@taylorreneegoodrich, this special originated from the earlier seasons when the paternity of Cersei's children was much more of a hushed secret. It's gotten more difficult to score now that Cersei and Jaime talk about it all the time, but in keeping with the original scoring, Cersei/Jaime get a point when it's someone else who talks about their childrens' bastardy *to* them. In this case it was Jaime's line to Cersei, but Cersei didn't respond back with anything about their kids.

the main distinction we went with is -nyan

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2016 May 2
Cersei also had a glass of wine so where are the points for that? -kimbo

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2016 May 2 joe.puglisi, bookworm13457, sofiazbv, Lem Lemoncake like this

Episode 3: Oathbreaker

32:28 (+3) Cersei Lannister:

Olenna to Cersei: "Margaery is the Queen. You are not the Queen, because you're not married to the king. I do appreciate these things can get a bit confusing in your family."
(Special)

Episode 6: Blood of My Blood

42:10 (+3) Cersei Lannister:

Jaime: "He has our son! He stole our son! He's torn our family apart." (Special)

Episode 7: The Broken Man

18:15 (+3) Bronn:

"Now that is a sorry attempt at a siege. Someone needs to teach those sad twats how to dig trenches." (Special)

22:03 (+3) Bronn:

Bronn starts instructing the Frey forces on the proper siege preparations: "Have your lads start digging perimeter trenches. Set pickets every hundred yards. And work double-time on those siege towers and trebuchets." (Special)

Episode 8: No One

15:44 (+3) Bronn:

Podrick: "She's training me to fight."
Bronn: "Is she? Oh ... Then how come an old cunt like me can still sneak up and murder you?"
Podrick: "Well, that's a different sort of fighting."
Bronn: "Now, that's the truth, isn't it? You want to learn that sort of fighting? ... All right, let's start with your footwork..." (Special)

Episode 9: Battle of the Bastards

35:26 (+3) Ramsay Bolton:

Ramsay releases Rickon Stark, and taunts him by allowing him to run to the Stark side while he attempts to shoot him down with his longbow. (Special)

submitted by nyan (approved!)

Episode 10: The Winds of Winter

10:26 (+3) Cersei Lannister:

Cersei pours herself a glass of wine while observing the events at the Sept of Baelor from afar. (Special)

18:15 (+3) Cersei Lannister:

Cersei pours out her glass of wine over Septa Unella's face as she is bound to a table. "Confess." (Special)

18:32 (+3) Cersei Lannister:

After emptying her glass, Cersei returns to pour out an entire pitcher of wine over Septa Unella's face as she tortures her. (Special)

©
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