Derion
joesucks
Owner: omgitsjoej
20 roto pts (#3)
Z-Score:
-0.642 (percentile: 26.04%)
Weeks at #1: 0
Categories won:
Best Week:
Episode 3: Oathbreaker
(+4.5 roto points)
Team MVP:
Jon Snow
(picked #1,
185 points,
45.91% of team total)
Roster Stats
Roster
charId | Character | Special |
---|---|---|
39 |
Jon Snow
The bastard son of Ned Stark, and the current Lord Commander of the Night's Watch. After guiding the Wildlings to safety in the aftermath of the Battle of Castle Black and the attack on Hardhome, he was betrayed by a mutiny of the Night's Watch, and left for dead in the snow.
|
* +1 each time he unintentionally drops Longclaw * +1 point each time he is called a bastard in his presence * Ghost's actions contribute to his points. |
6 |
Arya Stark
The youngest of the Stark girls. Free-spirited and rebellious, Arya escaped the war-ravaged Westeros and currently resides in Braavos, where she trains under the face-changing assassin Jaqen H'ghar in the House of Black and White.
|
* Nymeria's actions contribute to her points. * +1 point for reciting her hitlist * adopting a new Faceless Man disguise |
61 |
Theon Greyjoy
Heir to the Iron Islands, and formerly a ward of House Stark. Theon has been broken through torture by the hands of Ramsay Bolton, but has escaped Winterfell along with Sansa Stark during the chaos of the Battle of Winterfell.
|
+1 point for scenes where Theon refers to himself as "Reek" +1 point when his missing manhood is referenced |
32 |
Jorah Mormont
The exiled head of House Mormont. Jorah was previously one of Daenerys Targaryen's most trusted advisors before his banishment. He returned to her service during a revolt in the fighting pits of Meereen, and now travels with Daario Naharis to rescue Daenerys, who has disappeared along with one of her dragons, Drogon.
|
* +1 point when he explains to someone he has Greyscale * +1 point in each scene that Jorah serves as an encyclopedia for Essos culture. * +1 point each time Daenerys convinces him to go on a mission / do something that doesn't involve being anywhere around her (friendzone) |
9 |
Brienne of Tarth
A skilled fighter and heir to House Tarth. A sworn sword to the late Catelyn Stark, she continues her mission to ensure the safety of the Stark girls.
|
* Scores every time she mentions the "oath" or "vow" she swore to serve the Starks. * Scores every time someone references her size/masculinity/attractiveness. |
82 |
Varys
Formerly the Master of Whisperers in King's Landing, Varys controls a vast network of spies. After smuggling Tyrion Lannister to Essos, he reveals himself as a supporter of Daenerys Targaryen's claim to the Iron Throne. In Daenerys' absence, he serves with Tyrion Lannister and presides over the rule of Meereen.
|
* +1 politics point when he meets another character in secret * +1 point when someone references his being a eunuch to him * +1 point when he passes along information from his "little birds" |
192 |
High Sparrow
The leader of the Sparrows, a religious movement within the Faith of the Seven. After being appointed as High Septon by Cersei Lannister, he has lead a sweeping inquiry to root out moral corruption in King's Landing, imprisoning Loras Tyrell, Margaery Tyrell, and Cersei Lannister.
|
1 politics point every time he (or Sparrows under his order) publicly out a named character for their sins |
37 |
Missandei
A freed slave from Astapor, who serves Daenerys as an advisor and translator.
|
+1 point for each scene where she speaks Valyrian or translates. |
Kills
15:49
(+2)
Brienne of Tarth:
Brienne cuts down the first Bolton soldier on horseback as she and Podrick rush in to save Sansa Stark. "It's a bloody woman!"
(Kill of Unnamed Character)
16:22
(+2)
Brienne of Tarth:
Brienne cuts down the second Bolton soldier who stupidly dismounts his horse to engage an enemy he's knocked to the ground.
(Kill of Unnamed Character)
16:31
(+2)
Brienne of Tarth:
Brienne cuts down the horse of a Bolton soldier, pinning the soldier's leg
(Kill of Unnamed Character)
17:00
(+2)
Brienne of Tarth:
Brienne ruthlessly slits the throat of a Bolton soldier pinned under his own horse.
(Kill of Unnamed Character)
17:13
(+2)
Theon Greyjoy:
Theon stabs a Bolton soldier through the back while he is battling Podrick Payne.
(Kill of Unnamed Character)
Jon cuts the rope holding the gallows platform at Castle Black, executing Ser Alliser Thorne, Bowen Marsh, Othell Yarwyck, and Olly for their roles in the plot to assassinate him.
(Kill of Named Character)
55:51
(+10)
Arya Stark:
Arya leads the Waif to her darkened quarters, where she extinguishes the lone candle with her sword Needle and gains the upper hand in complete darkness.
(Kill of Named Character)
After stumbling between the charging cavalry forces in a daze, Jon scores his first kill, knocking a Bolton soldier off his horse and then finishing him off on the ground.
(Kill of Unnamed Character)
Jon cuts down six more soldiers on the battlefield as he dodges charging cavalry and arrow barrages streaming from the sky.
(Kill of Unnamed Character)
Jon cuts down 3 more Bolton soldiers in between arrow barrages from Ramsay's archers.
(Kill of Unnamed Character)
Jon cuts down 4 more Bolton soldiers as the mounds of bodies begin to pile up on the battlefield.
(Kill of Unnamed Character)
Jon slits the throat of a Bolton soldier shortly after Davos and Smalljon Umber charge into the fray.
(Kill of Unnamed Character)
Jon stabs through a Bolton soldier as his forces attempt to break through the encircling Bolton army.
(Kill of Unnamed Character)
Jon uses a spin move to dodge and cut down a Bolton soldier from behind.
(Kill of Unnamed Character)
After the Stark forces breach the Winterfell walls, Ramsay challenges Jon to single combat: "You suggested one-on-one combat, didn't you? I've reconsidered. I think that sounds like a wonderful idea."
Jon blocks all three of Ramsay's longbow shots with a Mormont shield, and finally moves in close enough to Ramsay to pummel him into the ground. (Major Injury of Named Character)
Jon blocks all three of Ramsay's longbow shots with a Mormont shield, and finally moves in close enough to Ramsay to pummel him into the ground. (Major Injury of Named Character)
9:05
(+5)
High Sparrow:
The High Sparrow orders the seven-pointed star to be carved into Loras Tyrell's forehead after his confessions, as a symbol of his sins and newfound faith in the Seven.
Margaery Tyrell: "You mutilated him. You gave me your word." (Major Injury of Named Character)
Margaery Tyrell: "You mutilated him. You gave me your word." (Major Injury of Named Character)
48:52
(+20)
Arya Stark:
Arya serves Walder Frey pies stuffed with meat from his own sons, Black Walder and Lothar Frey.
Walder Frey: "Where are my damn moron sons? Black Walder and Lothar promised to be here by midday."
Arya: "But they're already here, my Lord... Here, my Lord... They weren't easy to carve." (Kill of Named Character)
Walder Frey: "Where are my damn moron sons? Black Walder and Lothar promised to be here by midday."
Arya: "But they're already here, my Lord... Here, my Lord... They weren't easy to carve." (Kill of Named Character)
49:06
(+10)
Arya Stark:
After serving him a meat pie cooked from his own sons, Arya slits the throat of Walder Frey. "My name is Arya Stark. I want you to know that. The last thing you're ever going to see is a Stark smiling down at you as you die."
(Kill of Named Character)
Political Wins
18:16
(+3)
Brienne of Tarth:
After saving her from capture by the Bolton soldiers, Brienne finally convinces Sansa Stark to accept her protection.
Brienne: "Lady Sansa, I offer my services once again. I will shield your back and keep your counsel and give my life for yours if need be. I swear it, by the Old Gods and the New."
Sansa: "And I vow... that you shall always have a place by my... hearth. and..."
Podrick assist" Meat and mead at my table."
Sansa: "...meat and mead at my table. And I pledge to ask no service of you that might bring you dishonor. I swear it by the Old Gods and the New. Arise." (Convincing Argument)
Brienne: "Lady Sansa, I offer my services once again. I will shield your back and keep your counsel and give my life for yours if need be. I swear it, by the Old Gods and the New."
Sansa: "And I vow... that you shall always have a place by my... hearth. and..."
Podrick assist" Meat and mead at my table."
Sansa: "...meat and mead at my table. And I pledge to ask no service of you that might bring you dishonor. I swear it by the Old Gods and the New. Arise." (Convincing Argument)
submitted by moonbaseu92 (approved!)
Varys' investigations have exposed Vala, the Meereenese prostitute who lured the Unsullied to her brothel so that the Sons of the Harpy could murder them.
"I know who you are and what you've done. You've done a lot. You've sacrificed your body for a cause, which is more than most people do. And you've helped the Sons of the Harpy murder the Unsullied and the Second Sons." (Secret Discovery)
"I know who you are and what you've done. You've done a lot. You've sacrificed your body for a cause, which is more than most people do. And you've helped the Sons of the Harpy murder the Unsullied and the Second Sons." (Secret Discovery)
submitted by moonbaseu92 (approved!)
Varys has discovered the source of the rebellion's funding after coercing the prostitute Vala.
"Sorry.. I was busy, learning who funds the Sons of the Harpy. Some things you can't rush... The Good Masters of Astapor, and the Wise Masters of Yunkai, with help from their friends in Volantis." (Secret Discovery)
"Sorry.. I was busy, learning who funds the Sons of the Harpy. Some things you can't rush... The Good Masters of Astapor, and the Wise Masters of Yunkai, with help from their friends in Volantis." (Secret Discovery)
37:21
(+3)
High Sparrow:
The High Sparrow convinces Tommen Baratheon to stand down his demands for his mother's entry into the Sept to see Myrcella.
High Sparrow: "A true leader avails himself of the wisest counsel he can. And no one is wiser than the Gods."
Tommen: "My grandfather once said something similar. Except for the part about the Gods."
High Sparrow: "The Gods worked through him whether he knew it or not. As they work through your mother. There's so much good in all of us. The best we can do is to help each other bring it out." (Convincing Argument)
High Sparrow: "A true leader avails himself of the wisest counsel he can. And no one is wiser than the Gods."
Tommen: "My grandfather once said something similar. Except for the part about the Gods."
High Sparrow: "The Gods worked through him whether he knew it or not. As they work through your mother. There's so much good in all of us. The best we can do is to help each other bring it out." (Convincing Argument)
Jon Snow reclaims Longclaw from his desk, after its ownership briefly transferred to Davos Seaworth during his death.
(New Weapon)
Melisandre becomes the latest devotee to the Jon Snow Fan Club.
Davos Seaworth: "Will you stay here at Castle Black?"
Melisandre: "I will do as Jon Snow commands."
Davo: "You serve Jon Snow now?"
Melisandre: "He is the Prince that was Promised." (New Follower/Prisoner)
Davos Seaworth: "Will you stay here at Castle Black?"
Melisandre: "I will do as Jon Snow commands."
Davo: "You serve Jon Snow now?"
Melisandre: "He is the Prince that was Promised." (New Follower/Prisoner)
10:24
(+3)
High Sparrow:
The High Sparrow convinces King Tommen to allow Margaery to proceed with her Walk of Atonement.
Tommen: "Is there no other way? ... It just seems very dangerous."
High Sparrow: "She'll be protected the entire way. The Faith Militant are very stern with those who overstep their bounds." (Convincing Argument)
Tommen: "Is there no other way? ... It just seems very dangerous."
High Sparrow: "She'll be protected the entire way. The Faith Militant are very stern with those who overstep their bounds." (Convincing Argument)
30:28
(+3)
High Sparrow:
The High Sparrow announces Margaery's crimes to the masses gathered at the Sept of Baelor. "Rich or poor, noble or common, if we sin, we must atone. Margaery of House Tyrell came to us a sinner. She stood before the gods in the holy sept and lied. She turned a blind eye to her brother's sins. She disgraced her house, her King, and herself."
(Politics Special)
30:46
(+3)
Arya Stark:
Arya betrays Bianca, who had entrusted her murder plot of Lady Crane to the Faceless Men. "Careful that one... she wants you dead."
(Act of Betrayal)
31:15
(+3)
Arya Stark:
Arya reclaims Needle, which she had buried into the docks of Braavos.
(New Weapon)
36:49
(+3)
High Sparrow:
The High Sparrow picks up an ownership stake in King's Landing after announcing a joint venture with Tommen Baratheon to make the Seven Kingdoms great again.
High Sparrow: "Together we announce a new age of harmony. A holy alliance between the Crown and the Faith."
Tommen: "The Crown and the Faith are the twin pillars upon which the world rests. Together we will restore the Seven Kingdoms to glory." (Acquire a New Castle/City/Army/Loot)
High Sparrow: "Together we announce a new age of harmony. A holy alliance between the Crown and the Faith."
Tommen: "The Crown and the Faith are the twin pillars upon which the world rests. Together we will restore the Seven Kingdoms to glory." (Acquire a New Castle/City/Army/Loot)
submitted by as38 (approved!)
36:52
(+6)
High Sparrow:
The High Sparrow announces the latest high-profile devotees to sign onto Team Sparrow, in a joint press conference with Tommen Baratheon and Margaery Tyrell.
"Queen Margaery has already atoned for her sins by bringing another into the true light of the Seven. Together we announce a new age of harmony. A holy alliance between the Crown and the Faith." (New Follower/Prisoner)
"Queen Margaery has already atoned for her sins by bringing another into the true light of the Seven. Together we announce a new age of harmony. A holy alliance between the Crown and the Faith." (New Follower/Prisoner)
Lyanna Mormont pledges her house to Jon Snow's fighting forces: "House Mormont has kept faith with House Stark for a thousand years... We will not break faith today."
(New Follower/Prisoner)
18:38
(+3)
Brienne of Tarth:
Brienne persuades Jaime Lannister to allow her to broker surrender terms with the Blackfish, who commands the Tully forces holding Riverrun.
Jaime: "I'm a Lannister. Don't ask me to betray my own house."
Brienne: "I do no such thing." (Convincing Argument)
Jaime: "I'm a Lannister. Don't ask me to betray my own house."
Brienne: "I do no such thing." (Convincing Argument)
After Wun Wun single-handedly breaks down the Winterfell gates, Jon Snow and his forces storm in, killing the remaining garrison of Bolton soldiers and defeating Ramsay Bolton.
(Victorious Battle)
Jon retakes Winterfell for House Stark after defeating Ramsay Bolton and the rest of the Bolton army.
(Acquire a New Castle/City/Army/Loot)
After being defeated in one-on-one combat, Ramsay is imprisoned in the kennels of Winterfell.
(New Follower/Prisoner)
8:37
(+3)
High Sparrow:
Loras renounces his claims to House Tyrell and swears himself to the High Sparrow and the Faith of the Seven.
Loras Tyrell: "I will abandon the Tyrell name and all that goes with it. I will renounce my lordship and my claims on Highgarden. I will never marry and I will never father children."
High Sparrow: "Brother Loras, I ask you to dedicate your life to the Seven Gods. Will you fight to defend your faith against heretics and apostates?"
Loras Tyrell: "I will." (New Follower/Prisoner)
Loras Tyrell: "I will abandon the Tyrell name and all that goes with it. I will renounce my lordship and my claims on Highgarden. I will never marry and I will never father children."
High Sparrow: "Brother Loras, I ask you to dedicate your life to the Seven Gods. Will you fight to defend your faith against heretics and apostates?"
Loras Tyrell: "I will." (New Follower/Prisoner)
10:04
(+3)
High Sparrow:
The High Sparrow reneges on his agreement to release Loras Tyrell after his confessions (presumably unharmed).
Margaery Tyrell: "You mutilated him. You gave me your word."
High Sparrow: "And I have kept my word. Once the Queen Mother's trial is concluded, Brother Loras is free to leave." (Act of Betrayal)
Margaery Tyrell: "You mutilated him. You gave me your word."
High Sparrow: "And I have kept my word. Once the Queen Mother's trial is concluded, Brother Loras is free to leave." (Act of Betrayal)
After Davos reveals that Melisandre had burned Princess Shireen at the stake and asks permission to execute her, Jon Snow elects the middle route and excommunicates her from the North. "Ride south today. If you return to the North, I'll have you hanged as a murderer."
(Executive Decision)
The Northern Lords Madnerly, Glover, Cerwyn declare their allegiance for Jon Snow as the King in the North.
Lord Wyman Manderly: "Lady Mormont speaks harshly, and truly ... I didn't think we'd find another king in my lifetime. I didn't commit my men to your cause, 'cause I didn't want more Manderly's dying for nothing. But I was wrong. Jon Snow avenged the Red Wedding. He is the White Wolf. The King in the North."
Lord Robett Glover: "I did not fight beside you on the field and I will regret that until my dying day. A man can only admit when he was wrong and ask forgiveness ... There will be more fights to come. House Glover will stand behind House Stark as we have for a thousand years. And I will stand behind Jon Snow. The King in the North!" (New Follower/Prisoner)
Lord Wyman Manderly: "Lady Mormont speaks harshly, and truly ... I didn't think we'd find another king in my lifetime. I didn't commit my men to your cause, 'cause I didn't want more Manderly's dying for nothing. But I was wrong. Jon Snow avenged the Red Wedding. He is the White Wolf. The King in the North."
Lord Robett Glover: "I did not fight beside you on the field and I will regret that until my dying day. A man can only admit when he was wrong and ask forgiveness ... There will be more fights to come. House Glover will stand behind House Stark as we have for a thousand years. And I will stand behind Jon Snow. The King in the North!" (New Follower/Prisoner)
Jon gains the allegiance of Lord Yohn Royce of the Vale, as he and the Northern lords declare Jon as King in the North.
(New Follower/Prisoner)
submitted by nyan (approved!)
Davos Seaworth rises with the other Northern lords in declaring their allegiance to Jon Snow as the King in the North.
(New Follower/Prisoner)
After Lyanna Mormont's rousing speech, the Northern lords declare for Jon Snow as the new King in the North.
Lyanna Mormont: "But House Mormont remembers. The North remembers. We know no king but the King in the North whose name is Stark. I don't care if he's a bastard. Ned Stark's blood runs through his veins. He's my king from this day until his last day." (New Title)
Lyanna Mormont: "But House Mormont remembers. The North remembers. We know no king but the King in the North whose name is Stark. I don't care if he's a bastard. Ned Stark's blood runs through his veins. He's my king from this day until his last day." (New Title)
Insults Delivered / Funny Lines
Tyrion to homeless mother: "For your baby. To eat." [makes stuffing motion into mouth]
Varys. "She thinks you want to eat her baby." (Funny Line)
Varys. "She thinks you want to eat her baby." (Funny Line)
18:20
(+3)
High Sparrow:
to Jaime Lannister, as his Sparrows circle in: "Every one of us is poor and powerless. And yet, together, we can overthrow an empire."
(Threat)
submitted by as38 (approved!)
Tyrion: "Dragons are intelligent ... They have affection for their friends and fury for their enemies. I am their friend."
Varys: "Do *they* know that?" (Funny Line)
Varys: "Do *they* know that?" (Funny Line)
submitted by danmirabile13 (approved!)
Varys shakes his head and tsks as Tyrion pours out a glass of wine during a meeting of the Meereenese advising council.
(Funny Line)
submitted by nyan (approved!)
Edd: "Your eyes are still brown. Is that still you in there?"
Jon: "I think so. Hold off on burning my body for now."
(Funny Line)
Jon: "I think so. Hold off on burning my body for now."
(Funny Line)
submitted by moonbaseu92 (approved!)
to Unsullied guards while fanning himself: "I don't know how you stand in all that leather."
(Funny Line)
submitted by danmirabile13 (approved!)
40:15
(+3)
Arya Stark:
Waif: "That's a short list. That can't be everyone you want to kill. Are you sure you're not forgetting someone?"
Arya: "Which name would you like a girl to speak?" (Threat)
Arya: "Which name would you like a girl to speak?" (Threat)
Edd: "Where you gonna go?"
Jon Snow: "South."
Edd: "What you gonna do?"
Jon: "Get warm?" (Funny Line)
Jon Snow: "South."
Edd: "What you gonna do?"
Jon: "Get warm?" (Funny Line)
after Sansa tastes the finest from Castle Black Brewery: "You'd think after thousands of years, the Night's Watch would have learned how to make a good ale."
(Funny Line)
submitted by kremershell (approved!)
8:18
(+3)
Brienne of Tarth:
Brienne: "I was Kingsguard to Renly Baratheon. Before Renly was assassinated with bloodmagic."
Nervous Davos: "That's... in the past now."
Brienne: "Yes, it's in the past. It doesn't mean I forget. *looks at Melisandre* Or forgive." (Threat)
Nervous Davos: "That's... in the past now."
Brienne: "Yes, it's in the past. It doesn't mean I forget. *looks at Melisandre* Or forgive." (Threat)
submitted by jamesfkehoe (approved!)
Tyrion: "Trust me. My own recent experience with slavery have taught me the horrors of that institution."
Missandei: "How many days were you a slave?"
Tyrion: "...long enough to know."
Missandei: "Not long enough to understand." (Witty Insult)
Missandei: "How many days were you a slave?"
Tyrion: "...long enough to know."
Missandei: "Not long enough to understand." (Witty Insult)
Tyrion, in Valyrian: "Large sorry... you wait so fat time."
Missandei: "Perhaps I should translate for you." (Funny Line)
Missandei: "Perhaps I should translate for you." (Funny Line)
20:38
(+3)
Jorah Mormont:
Daario: "Oh, I don't want to fight you, Jorah the Andal. What do I have to gain? If I win, I'm the shit who killed an old man. If I lose, I'm the shit who was killed by an old man."
Jorah: "You didn't get much discipline as a child, did you?" (Witty Insult)
Jorah: "You didn't get much discipline as a child, did you?" (Witty Insult)
42:47
(+3)
Brienne of Tarth:
Brienne: "I don't like leaving you here alone."
Sansa: "With Jon?"
Brienne: "Not him. He seems trustworthy. A bit... brooding, perhaps. I suppose that's understandable, considering. The others, though. Davos and the Red Woman helped a man murder his own brother with bloodmagic... and that wildling fellow with the beard-" (Funny Line)
Sansa: "With Jon?"
Brienne: "Not him. He seems trustworthy. A bit... brooding, perhaps. I suppose that's understandable, considering. The others, though. Davos and the Red Woman helped a man murder his own brother with bloodmagic... and that wildling fellow with the beard-" (Funny Line)
9:22
(+3)
High Sparrow:
to Margaery: "The Queen of Thorns is a remarkable woman, a strong woman. And an unrepentant sinner. You must teach her the new one, as she taught you the old, or I fear for her safety, body and soul."
(Threat)
14:01
(+3)
Brienne of Tarth:
Podrick Payne: "Looks like a siege, my lady."
Brienne: "You have a keen military mind, Pod." (Witty Insult)
Brienne: "You have a keen military mind, Pod." (Witty Insult)
Glasses of Wine Consumed
35:48
(+5)
Theon Greyjoy:
Yara forces Theon to drink while the fleet is docked.
Theon: "I don't want any."
Yara: "I don't care what you want. Drink." (Glass of Wine Consumed)
Theon: "I don't want any."
Yara: "I don't care what you want. Drink." (Glass of Wine Consumed)
7:07
(+5)
Arya Stark:
Arya drinks a glass of milk of the poppy to settle her into sleep.
(Glass of Wine Consumed)
Grey Worm drinks in the Meereenese council room, as Tyrion toasts: "Here's to our Queen. Anyone not drinking is disrespecting our Queen."
(Glass of Wine Consumed)
Acts of Intercourse
Deaths
17:25
(+10)
High Sparrow:
The High Sparrow is engulfed as the wildfire explosion rips through the floor of the Sept of Baelor.
(Death)
Special
Tyrion references Varys' eunuch status in his comeback.
Varys: "You walk as though the paving stones were your personal property. I used to steal from people like you when I was a boy."
Tyrion: "It's a good thing you're not a boy anymore. ... Because you have no cock." (Special)
Varys: "You walk as though the paving stones were your personal property. I used to steal from people like you when I was a boy."
Tyrion: "It's a good thing you're not a boy anymore. ... Because you have no cock." (Special)
33:27
(+3)
Jorah Mormont:
Daario Naharis calls out Jorah's friendzone status like he sees it:
Jorah: "I've been all over the world. There's no escaping men like us."
Daario: "There's no escaping her, eh? You keep coming back. Why?"
Jorah: "You know why."
Daario: "Isn't it frustrating wanting someone who doesn't want you back?" (Special)
Jorah: "I've been all over the world. There's no escaping men like us."
Daario: "There's no escaping her, eh? You keep coming back. Why?"
Jorah: "You know why."
Daario: "Isn't it frustrating wanting someone who doesn't want you back?" (Special)
34:20
(+3)
Jorah Mormont:
Jorah corrects Daario with the proper Essos terminology.
Daario: "Huh... an army?"
Jorah: "Not an army. A horde." (Special)
Daario: "Huh... an army?"
Jorah: "Not an army. A horde." (Special)
Varys just can't get away from the eunuch references after he judgmentally stares at Tyrion downing another cup of wine.
Tyrion: "If I lost my cock, I'd drink all the time. *looks at Greyworm* ...meaning no offense. He makes dwarf jokes, I make eunuch jokes." (Special)
Tyrion: "If I lost my cock, I'd drink all the time. *looks at Greyworm* ...meaning no offense. He makes dwarf jokes, I make eunuch jokes." (Special)
submitted by alexander.hilton91 (approved!)
Roose Bolton: "Jon Snow is a bastard, not a Stark."
(Special)
submitted by kremershell (approved!)
40:15
(+3)
Arya Stark:
Waif: "Who else was on Arya Stark's funny little list?"
Arya: "Cersei Lannister. Gregor Clegane. Walder Frey." (Special)
Arya: "Cersei Lannister. Gregor Clegane. Walder Frey." (Special)
Ramsay Bolton: "Why have you come to Winterfell, Lord Umber?"
Smalljon Umber: "The bastard Jon Snow led an army of Wildlings past the Wall." (Special)
Smalljon Umber: "The bastard Jon Snow led an army of Wildlings past the Wall." (Special)
Ramsay Bolton: "Pledge your banners to House Bolton. Swear loyalty to me as Warden of the North and we will fight together to destroy the bastard and all his Wildling friends."
(Special)
Astapor slave master: "We came here to meet the Queen, and instead we're greeted by a dwarf and a eunuch."
(Special)
in Valyrian to the former slaves: "I do not trust them (the slave mastesr). I will never trust them. ... but as a wise man once said, 'We make peace with our enemies, not out friends'."
(Special)
20:28
(+3)
Jorah Mormont:
Friendzone ribbing from alpha-male Daario
Daario Naharis: "It must make you angry, that our Queen chose me."
Jorah: "It makes me sad. You'll disappoint her before long, she'll move on." (Special)
Daario Naharis: "It must make you angry, that our Queen chose me."
Jorah: "It makes me sad. You'll disappoint her before long, she'll move on." (Special)
submitted by cjcookart (approved!)
21:03
(+3)
Jorah Mormont:
Jorah the Explorah gives Daario this week's culture lesson on Dothraki city layout.
"The road running through the Horse Gate, they call that the Godsway. Eastern Market, Western Market. When Khal Drogo died, she was supposed to come here and join the Dosh Khaleen, the widows of the dead Khals. That's where they'll have taken her. The Temple of the Dosh Khaleen." (Special)
"The road running through the Horse Gate, they call that the Godsway. Eastern Market, Western Market. When Khal Drogo died, she was supposed to come here and join the Dosh Khaleen, the widows of the dead Khals. That's where they'll have taken her. The Temple of the Dosh Khaleen." (Special)
25:10
(+3)
Jorah Mormont:
Jorah reminds Daario about the rules of engagement in Vaes Dothrak: "If they find a body with a stab wound, the whole city will be looking for us."
(Special)
43:11
(+3)
Theon Greyjoy:
Theon acts against his own self-interest, throwing away his own claim in support of his sister Yara ruling the Iron Islands.
(Special)
submitted by skywalkerdude (approved!)
Jon opens up Ramsay Bolton's letter, addressed: "To the traitor and bastard, Jon Snow."
(Special)
Ramsay Bolton's letter to Jon: "Winterfell is mine, bastard. Come and see."
(Special)
Ramsay Bolton's letter to Jon: "I want my bride back. Send her to me, bastard, and I will not trouble you or your Wildling lovers."
(Special)
19:44
(+3)
Theon Greyjoy:
Theon elects to stump for his sister Yara, after other some of the other Ironborn nominate him to inherit the Salt Throne. "I am Theon Greyjoy, last living son of Balon Greyjoy ... and she is your rightful ruler."
(Special)
28:19
(+3)
Jorah Mormont:
Jorah admits his love for Daenerys after revealing his fatal greyscale infection. "Tyrion Lannister was right. I love you. I'll always love you. Good-bye, Khaleesi."
(Special)
submitted by wsleppy (approved!)
High Priestess Kinvara talks to Varys about his castration.
"If not for your... mutilation at the hand of a second-rate sorcerer, you wouldn't be here. Helping the Lord's Chosen bring his light into the world... Do you remember what you heard that night when the sorcerer tossed your parts in the fire?" (Special)
"If not for your... mutilation at the hand of a second-rate sorcerer, you wouldn't be here. Helping the Lord's Chosen bring his light into the world... Do you remember what you heard that night when the sorcerer tossed your parts in the fire?" (Special)
submitted by emilien.raggi (approved!)
3:52
(+3)
Brienne of Tarth:
Septon Ray: "How many men did it take to cut you down?"
Sandor Clegane: "Just one."
Ray: "Whew... he must have been some kind of a monster."
Sandor: "He was a woman." (Special)
Sandor Clegane: "Just one."
Ray: "Whew... he must have been some kind of a monster."
Sandor: "He was a woman." (Special)
35:42
(+3)
Theon Greyjoy:
Yara forces Theon to drink while the fleet is docked.
Theon: "I don't want any."
Yara: "I don't care what you want. Drink." (Special)
Theon: "I don't want any."
Yara: "I don't care what you want. Drink." (Special)
submitted by rls14 (approved!)
Varys: "If you shaved your beard with a straight razor, you'd say the razor worked. That doesn't mean it won't cut your throat."
Tyrion: "Spoken like a man who has never had to shave." (Special)
Tyrion: "Spoken like a man who has never had to shave." (Special)
submitted by alexanderdropkin (approved!)
15:09
(+3)
Brienne of Tarth:
As Brienne meets with Jaime inside a tent on the Lannister siege line, Bronn outs himself as Vice President of the Brienne's a Hottie Admiration Society.
Bronn: "You think they're fucking?"
Podrick: "What? No."
Bronn: "Why not? I'd fuck her. You'd fuck her, wouldn't you? ... Well he'd (Jaime) fuck her, that's for sure. And she'd fuck him, don't you think?" (Special)
Bronn: "You think they're fucking?"
Podrick: "What? No."
Bronn: "Why not? I'd fuck her. You'd fuck her, wouldn't you? ... Well he'd (Jaime) fuck her, that's for sure. And she'd fuck him, don't you think?" (Special)
submitted by alexanderdropkin (approved!)
Ramsay Bolton: "Come, bastard. You don't have the men, you don't have the horses, and you don't have Winterfell."
(Special)
Ramsay Bolton: "We'll find out soon enough. In the morning, then, bastard."
(Special)
Sansa Stark: "Rickon is Ned Stark's trueborn son, which makes him a greater threat to Ramsay than you, a bastard, or me, a girl."
(Special)
Petyr Baelish: "Who should the North rally behind? A trueborn daughter of Ned and Catelyn Stark born here at Winterfell? Or a motherless bastard born in the south?"
(Special)