Evans little dragons
Lords of the Couch
Owner: evan19k
27.5 roto pts (#7)
Z-Score:
-1.262 (percentile: 10.33%)
Weeks at #1: 0
Categories won:
Best Week:
Episode 2: Stormborn
(+6.5 roto points)
Team MVP:
Samwell Tarly
(picked #20,
55 points,
42.97% of team total)
Roster Stats
Roster
charId | Character | Special |
---|---|---|
9 |
Brienne of Tarth
A skilled fighter and heir to House Tarth. After swearing an oath to Catelyn Stark, she continues her mission to ensure the safety of the Stark girls.
|
* Scores every time she mentions the "oath" or "vow" she swore to serve the Starks. * Scores every time someone references her size/masculinity/attractiveness. |
28 |
Gregor Clegane (The Mountain)
A knight and the head of House Clegane, he serves as a member of the Kingsguard and Cersei's personal muscle. He is a massive and impossibly strong warrior, although he remains speechless and zombie-like ever since being wounded in a Trial by Combat against Oberyn Martell.
|
* Scores for any kills of non-combatants * Scores for each sentence spoken * Interacting with bowls |
40 |
Samwell Tarly
A steward of the Night's Watch, Samwell has been sent south to Oldtown to begin his training as a Maester. He is a close friend to Jon Snow, and one of the few people known to have killed a White Walker.
|
+1 point for reading books, mentioning he "read that in a book", or writing raven letters. |
38 |
Grey Worm
The leader of the Unsullied - a highly-trained army of freed slaves who serve Daenerys Targaryen.
|
* +1 for every 3-syllable word uttered in the Common Tongue (Westerosi English), not counting proper nouns (Daenerys, Unsullied, etc.) * Receives standard sex points for making it to first base |
221 |
Randyll Tarly
Samwell Tarly's disapproving father. He is the Lord of House Tarly, and was one of the greatest soldiers in Westeros.
|
|
195 |
Septa Unella
A Septa who took exceptional pleasure in torturing Cersei Lannister while she was a prisoner of the Sparrows, ringing the shame! shame! shame! bell as she made her walk of atonement. She is now held as a prisoner of Cersei.
|
+1 point for each bell ringing (S6 onwards) |
233 |
Aeron Greyjoy
An uncle of Theon Greyjoy, who serves as a priest to the Drowned God.
|
|
188 |
Yezzan zo Qaggaz (slave trader)
A slave trader from Yunkai. He briefly owns Jorah Mormont, who he brings to the fighting pits of Meereen, and is present during the slavers' attack on Meereen. He is the only slave master spared by Daenerys, who sends him to Astapor with a message for those who would oppose the Mother of Dragons.
|
|
277 |
Ned Umber
The young new Lord of House Umber
|
|
189 |
Nymeria Sand
One of Oberyn Martell's bastards, known as Sand Snakes. She's into whips.
|
+1 for invoking the name of Oberyn Martell |
Kills
33:54
(+5)
Samwell Tarly:
Samwell plies off the infected Greyscale tissue from Jorah's chest, with all the gentleness of a spoon digging through hot pie.
(Major Injury of Named Character)
53:09
(+2)
Nymeria Sand:
Nymeria stabs an Ironborn, only to turn around to see her sister Obara being killed.
(Kill of Unnamed Character)
53:18
(+1)
Nymeria Sand:
In a fury after witnessing her sister Obara's death, Nymeria whip-grabbles Euron Greyjoy, spinning closer to slice him across the leg with her dagger.
(Minor Injury of Named Character)
Grey Worm slits the throat of a Lannister guard, after sneaking past the walls of Casterly Rock via the sewer tunnels.
(Kill of Unnamed Character)
Leading the Unsullied, Grey Worm stabs two Lannister soldiers while charging the stairs, and smashes two more with his shield.
(Kill of Unnamed Character)
At the top of the stairs, Grey Worm kills 7 Lannister soldiers, throwing his spear to impale the last one against a door.
(Kill of Unnamed Character)
28:28
(+1)
Brienne of Tarth:
Brienne beats lucky man Podrick badly in a sparring session at Winterfell, before Arya Stark inerrupts.
Brienne: "Don't lunge."
Brienne: "Don't go where your enemy leads you."
Brienne: "And don't-"
Arya: "Don't fight someone like her in the first place." (Minor Injury of Named Character)
Brienne: "Don't lunge."
Brienne: "Don't go where your enemy leads you."
Brienne: "And don't-"
Arya: "Don't fight someone like her in the first place." (Minor Injury of Named Character)
Political Wins
27:02
(+3)
Samwell Tarly:
Samwell has officially made it to grad-school life, having been admitted as a student of the Citadel. His first task is latrine duty.
(New Title)
50:13
(+3)
Samwell Tarly:
As Samwell flips the pages of the restricted Maester books, he discovers that Dragonstone sits on a literal mountain of dragonglass, a weapon crucial to defeating the White Walkers.
(Secret Discovery)
30:55
(+3)
Samwell Tarly:
Samwell sneaks into Jorah's room to try an experimental Greyscale treatment on him, despite Archmaester Ebrose's forbidding him to do so.
(Executive Decision)
38:07
(+3)
Samwell Tarly:
Samwell's letter is the final straw that convinces Jon Snow to ally with Daenerys Targaryen.
"This message was sent to me by Samwell Tarly. He was my brother at the Night's Watch. A man I trust as much as anyone in this world. He's discovered proof that Dragonstone sits on a mountain of dragonglass." (Convincing Argument)
"This message was sent to me by Samwell Tarly. He was my brother at the Night's Watch. A man I trust as much as anyone in this world. He's discovered proof that Dragonstone sits on a mountain of dragonglass." (Convincing Argument)
Grey Worm and his Unsullied step over the bodies of dead Lannister soldiers atop the walls at Casterly Rock, surveying their victory in taking the castle.
(Victorious Battle)
Grey Worm and his Unsullied step over the bodies of dead Lannister soldiers atop the walls at Casterly Rock, surveying their victory in taking the castle.
(Acquire a New Castle/City/Army/Loot)
55:56
(+3)
Randyll Tarly:
Randyll Tarly becomes Warden of the South, having accepted Jaime's previous offer to rebel against the Tyrells as he rides with the Lannister army in the attack on Highgarden.
(New Title)
55:56
(+3)
Randyll Tarly:
Randyll Tarly betrays the Tyrells, to whom he is a sworn bannerman, siding with Lannisters and marching with their army in in the attack on Highgarden.
(Act of Betrayal)
48:41
(+3)
Samwell Tarly:
Samwell steals several books and records from the restricted area of the library and abandons the Citadel with Gilly and little Sam.
Gilly: "Are you sure you want to do this? You always wanted to be a Maester."
Samwell: "I'm tired of reading about the achievements of better men." (Act of Betrayal)
Gilly: "Are you sure you want to do this? You always wanted to be a Maester."
Samwell: "I'm tired of reading about the achievements of better men." (Act of Betrayal)
69:17
(+3)
Samwell Tarly:
Sam puts the pieces of Bran's visions about Jon Snow's parentage together, remembering what Gilly told him at the Citadel about Rhaegar Targaryen's secret wedding.
"At the Citadel, I transcribed a High Septon's diary. He annulled Rhaegar's marriage to Elia. He wed Rhaegar and Lyanna in a secret ceremony." (Secret Discovery)
"At the Citadel, I transcribed a High Septon's diary. He annulled Rhaegar's marriage to Elia. He wed Rhaegar and Lyanna in a secret ceremony." (Secret Discovery)
Insults Delivered / Funny Lines
0:00
(+3)
Randyll Tarly:
"I'm a Tarly. That name means something. We're not oathbreakers. We're not schemers. We don't stab our rivals in the back or cut their throats at weddings."
(Witty Insult)
submitted by peggypcwu (approved!)
48:28
(+3)
Nymeria Sand:
Tyene Sand: "Maybe I'll kill you both before we take King's Landing. And then I won't have to share."
Obara and Nymeria: "(baby voice) Mammmaaa!" (Funny Line)
Obara and Nymeria: "(baby voice) Mammmaaa!" (Funny Line)
47:05
(+3)
Samwell Tarly:
Gilly: "Guess how many windows are in the Great Sept of Baelor.
Sam: "None anymore." (Funny Line)
Sam: "None anymore." (Funny Line)
47:58
(+3)
Samwell Tarly:
Sam goes on a rant to Gilly about the order of Maesters: "We can all become slavering, murderous imbeciles in thrall to evil incarnate as long as we can have access to the full records of High Septon Maynard's 15,782 shits!"
(Witty Insult)
submitted by hkeseyan (approved!)
67:52
(+3)
Samwell Tarly:
Sam: "What happened to you beyond the Wall?"
Bran Stark: "I became the Three-Eyed Raven."
Sam: "Ohhh! ...I don't know what that means." (Funny Line)
Bran Stark: "I became the Three-Eyed Raven."
Sam: "Ohhh! ...I don't know what that means." (Funny Line)
Glasses of Wine Consumed
31:39
(+5)
Samwell Tarly:
Samwell takes a hearty swig of the rum he gives to Jorah, before attempting the Greyscale surgery.
(Glass of Wine Consumed)
Acts of Intercourse
Deaths
53:30
(+5)
Nymeria Sand:
Nymeria is bested by Euron Greyjoy, who blocks her dagger and strangles her with her own whip.
(Death)
56:02
(+2)
Nymeria Sand:
In the aftermath of Euron's ambush on Yara's fleet, Nymeria's body hangs from the bowsprit of the burning ship, with her own whip as a noose.
(Dead Body Appearance)
10:54
(+5)
Randyll Tarly:
After refusing to bend the knee, Randyll is burned to ashes by Drogon's dragonfire alongside his son Dickon.
Daenerys: "Lord Randyll Tarly, Dickon Tarly, I, Daenerys of House Targaryen, First of My Name, Breaker of Chains, and Mother of Dragons, sentence you to die. Dracarys." (Death)
Daenerys: "Lord Randyll Tarly, Dickon Tarly, I, Daenerys of House Targaryen, First of My Name, Breaker of Chains, and Mother of Dragons, sentence you to die. Dracarys." (Death)
Special
49:18
(+3)
Samwell Tarly:
Sam does some late night studying with his pirated JSTOR copies of the restricted Maester books.
(Special)
50:32
(+3)
Samwell Tarly:
Sam begins writing a raven letter to Jon to inform him of the cache of dragonglass buried beneath Dragonstone.
(Special)
29:52
(+3)
Samwell Tarly:
Samwell mentions that he has potentially found a treatment option for Jorah Mormont's greyscale in a book. "I found the procedure in a study of rare diseases by Archmaester Pylos".
(Special)
31:52
(+3)
Samwell Tarly:
Samwell opens up Archmaester Pylos' tome on Rare Diseases, which contains the instructions for the Greyscale treatment he is to perform on Jorah.
(Special)
50:08
(+3)
Samwell Tarly:
Archmaester Ebrose: "It's a meticulous, difficult procedure. Many Maesters whose chains are heavy with healing links have attempted it and failed. Yet you succeeded. How?"
Sam: "I read the books and followed the instructions." (Special)
Sam: "I read the books and followed the instructions." (Special)
46:49
(+3)
Samwell Tarly:
Sam reads from a book as he transcribes it onto a fresh set of paper, before handing it over to Baby Sam.
(Special)
submitted by hkeseyan (approved!)
The Feels
20:20
(+0)
Brienne of Tarth:
While watching on as the living Stark children together in the courtyard of Winterfell:
Podrick: "Catelyn Stark would be proud. You've kept your vow."
Brienne: "I did next to nothing."
Podrick: "You're too hard on yourself, My Lady."
Brienne: "I'm not- ...thank you, Podrick." (Warm Fuzzy Moment)
Podrick: "Catelyn Stark would be proud. You've kept your vow."
Brienne: "I did next to nothing."
Podrick: "You're too hard on yourself, My Lady."
Brienne: "I'm not- ...thank you, Podrick." (Warm Fuzzy Moment)