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The White Wankers | Fantasora

The White Wankers

Game of Thailand-Tronds

Owner: hedda.maurud

3-4, 18.5 roto pts (#3)
Z-Score: -0.671 (percentile: 25.1%)
Weeks at #1: 0
Categories won:
Best Week: Episode 5: Eastwatch (+0.5 roto points)
Team MVP: Jon Snow (picked #2, 165 points, 39.29% of team total)
Longest winstreak: W-2

Roster Stats

Character Drafted Total Kills Politics Insults Wine Sex Thrones Deaths Special Feels
Recently declared King in the North, he is the bastard son of Ned Stark, and formerly served as Lord Commander of the Night's Watch before he was betrayed by his fellow men.
#2 165 89 36 15 0 10 0 0 15 0
Lord of Blackhaven, bannermen to House Baratheon. He leads the Brotherhood Without Banners, an outlaw fighting group in the Riverlands.
#26 85 70 6 0 0 0 0 0 9 0
A steward of the Night's Watch, Samwell has been sent south to Oldtown to begin his training as a Maester. He is a close friend to Jon Snow, and one of the few people known to have killed a White Walker.
#15 55 5 18 9 5 0 0 0 18 0
The leader of the White Walkers.
#7 41 26 15 0 0 0 0 0 0 0
The matriarch of House Tyrell, Olenna seeks only revenge against the Lannisters after Cersei wiped out nearly all of House Tyrell in the wildfire explosion at the Sept of Baelor. She is known as the "Queen of Thorns" for her sarcasm and wit.
#18 29 10 0 9 5 0 0 5 0 0
Lord Protector of the Vale, Littlefinger effectively controls the Knights of the Vale through the easily manipulated Robbin Arryn. He is a master manipulator who will stop at nothing for power.
#10 17 0 12 0 0 0 0 5 0 0
Formerly the Master of Whisperers in King's Landing, Varys now pulls the political strings for Daenerys Targaryen, arranging alliances with the Westerosi Houses Tyrell and Martell. He controls a vast network of spies.
#23 14 0 3 6 5 0 0 0 0 0
The former paramour of Prince Oberyn. She is also the mother of several of his bastard children, known as the Sand Snakes, and plots revenge against the Lannisters for Oberyn's death. After assassinating Prince Doran and overtaking Dorne, she joins forces with Daenerys Targaryen as she sails west to retake the Iron Throne.
#31 11 0 0 3 5 0 0 0 3 0
The eldest child of Howland Reed, bannerman to the Starks. She assists Bran in his journeys north of the Wall and is the only other surviving member of his party.
#34 3 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 3 0
The young, sickly son of the late Jon Arryn and Lysa Tully. He is Lord of the Vale, although he is easily manipualted by Lord Petyr Baelish, who serves as Lord Protector until he comes of age.
#39 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0
Totals 420 200 90 42 20 10 0 10 48 0

Roster

charId Character Special
39
Recently declared King in the North, he is the bastard son of Ned Stark, and formerly served as Lord Commander of the Night's Watch before he was betrayed by his fellow men.
* +1 each time he unintentionally drops Longclaw
* +1 point each time he is called a bastard in his presence
* Ghost's actions contribute to his points.
130
The leader of the White Walkers.
* Actions of dragons while dragonriding
* Wights or White Walker versions of named chars are counted as followers (unless shown to be re-animated by someone else)
* Scenes of Winter arriving anywhere south of the Riverlands (inclusive)
* works of White Walker art
79
Lord Protector of the Vale, Littlefinger effectively controls the Knights of the Vale through the easily manipulated Robbin Arryn. He is a master manipulator who will stop at nothing for power.
+1 point in the intercourse category for sex events that occur in his brothels
2x multiplier for betrayal events
+1 for every kiss he gives to Sansa
40
A steward of the Night's Watch, Samwell has been sent south to Oldtown to begin his training as a Maester. He is a close friend to Jon Snow, and one of the few people known to have killed a White Walker.
+1 point for reading books, mentioning he "read that in a book", or writing raven letters.
59
The matriarch of House Tyrell, Olenna seeks only revenge against the Lannisters after Cersei wiped out nearly all of House Tyrell in the wildfire explosion at the Sept of Baelor. She is known as the "Queen of Thorns" for her sarcasm and wit.
+1 point every time she interlocks arms with someone while walking.
82
Formerly the Master of Whisperers in King's Landing, Varys now pulls the political strings for Daenerys Targaryen, arranging alliances with the Westerosi Houses Tyrell and Martell. He controls a vast network of spies.
* +1 politics point when he meets another character in secret
* +1 point when someone references his being a eunuch to him
* +1 point when he passes along information from his "little birds"
101
Lord of Blackhaven, bannermen to House Baratheon. He leads the Brotherhood Without Banners, an outlaw fighting group in the Riverlands.
Can receive points multiple times in the Death category
+1 when shown igniting the flaming sword
91
The former paramour of Prince Oberyn. She is also the mother of several of his bastard children, known as the Sand Snakes, and plots revenge against the Lannisters for Oberyn's death. After assassinating Prince Doran and overtaking Dorne, she joins forces with Daenerys Targaryen as she sails west to retake the Iron Throne.
+1 for invoking the name of Oberyn Martell
13
The eldest child of Howland Reed, bannerman to the Starks. She assists Bran in his journeys north of the Wall and is the only other surviving member of his party.
+1 every time she transports Bran
84
The young, sickly son of the late Jon Arryn and Lysa Tully. He is Lord of the Vale, although he is easily manipualted by Lord Petyr Baelish, who serves as Lord Protector until he comes of age.
Gains points in the the Wine category for breastfeeding.
+1 point when he mentions making something "fly".
Kills
Episode 2: Stormborn
Samwell plies off the infected Greyscale tissue from Jorah's chest, with all the gentleness of a spoon digging through hot pie. (Major Injury of Named Character)
43:40 (+1) Jon Snow:
Jon chokes a creeping Littlefinger against a wall in the Crypts of Winterfell. "Talk to my sister, and I'll kill you myself." (Minor Injury of Named Character)
Episode 3: The Queen's Justice
After the Tyrell forces are defeated and Highgarden is taken by the Lannisters, Olenna accepts the mercy offering of poisoned wine offered by Jaime.

Olenna: "Will there be pain?"
Jaime: "No, I made sure of that."
Olenna: "That's good."
(Major Injury of Named Character)
submitted by nyan (approved!)
Episode 5: Eastwatch
Jaime confirms the death of Olenna Tyrell from the poisoned wine she takes after the Tyrell defeat at Highgarden. "It was Olenna. She confessed before she died." (Kill of Named Character (finished off from previously fatal injury))
Episode 6: Beyond the Wall
Beric smacks his flaming sword onto the wight bear, setting it on fire. (Major Injury of Named Character)
Beric applies his flaming sword to cauterize the chest wounds suffered by Thoros at the paws of the wight bear. (Minor Injury of Named Character)
Beric slices through a wight during the ambush on the White Walker scouting party. (Kill of Unnamed Character)
33:06 (+10) Jon Snow:
After dodging a blow, Jon slices through the White Walker leading the scouting party with Longclaw, shattering it to pieces. (Kill of Named Character)
33:07 (+14) Jon Snow:
7 of the wights in the scouting party disintegrate after Jon kills the White Walker leading them.
(Kill of Unnamed Character)
submitted by nyan (approved!)
47:17 (+34) Jon Snow:
Jon cuts down 17 wights in the ensuing battle as the Night King's Army of the Dead descends upon the group, up until Daenerys and her dragons arrive. (Kill of Unnamed Character)
Beric cuts down 31 wights in the ensuing battle as the Night King's Army of the Dead descends upon the group. (Kill of Unnamed Character)
52:39 (+20) Jon Snow:
Jon realizes he is currently only 4th place on the Kills leaderboard, and climbs back down off of Drogon to score 10 more wight kills in garbage time, as all the others wisely get onboard. (Kill of Unnamed Character)
The Night King launches a perfect javelin toss, striking Viserion right in the neck and bringing him crashing straight down into the icy lake. (Kill of Named Character)
54:34 (+8) Jon Snow:
Jon Snow cuts down four wights after witnessing Viseron's death, before realizing that trying to cut his way to the Night King for a 1v1 was a terrible idea and that he should really get back to the dragon evac. (Kill of Unnamed Character)
Episode 7: The Dragon and the Wolf
23:04 (+2) Jon Snow:
At the audience in King's Landing, Jon demonstrates the two ways of defeating the Army of the Dead, burning the wight's severed hand, and then finishing off the dismembered wight with a dragonglass dagger. (Kill of Unnamed Character)
Political Wins
Episode 1: Dragonstone
The Night King marches across the tundra, having newly added several wight Giants to his army. (Acquire a New Castle/City/Army/Loot)
12:31 (+3) Jon Snow:
Jon refuses to strip the Umbers and Karstarks of their castles for Smalljon and Harald's treasonous siding with Ramsay Bolton, despite the objections from Sansa and the other Northern lords.

"...I will not punish a son for his father's sins, and I will not take a family home away from a family it has belonged to for centuries.
That is my decision, and my decision is final."
(Executive Decision)
13:14 (+6) Jon Snow:
Jon receives pledges of loyalty from Ned Umber and Alys Karstark, the new heads of their respective houses after Smalljon Umber and Harald Karstark died in the Battle of Winterfell. (New Follower/Prisoner)
Samwell has officially made it to grad-school life, having been admitted as a student of the Citadel. His first task is latrine duty. (New Title)
While looking into Thoros' flames, Sandor Clegane discovers the location of the planned White Walker invasion - Eastwatch-by-the-Sea -  a secret which Beric seems to already be aware of.
---
Sandor Clegane: "Ice.  A wall of ice.  The Wall. ... It's where the Wall meets the sea.  There's a castle there.  There's a mountain.  Looks like an arrowhead.  The dead are marching past.  Thousands of them."
Beric: "Do you believe me now, Clegane?"
(Secret Discovery)
As Samwell flips the pages of the restricted Maester books, he discovers that Dragonstone sits on a literal mountain of dragonglass, a weapon crucial to defeating the White Walkers. (Secret Discovery)
Episode 2: Stormborn
5:16 (+3) Varys:
Varys convinces Daenerys that she doesn't need to demand his blind allegiance, as long as she is a just ruler.

Daenerys: "Proven himself loyal? Quite the opposite. If he dislikes one monarch, he conspires to crown the next one. What kind of servant is this?"

Varys: "The kind the realm needs. Incompetence should not be rewarded with blind loyalty. As long as I have my eyes, I'll use them. I wasn't born into a great house. I came from nothing. I was so sold as a slave, and carved up as an offering. When I was a child I lived in gutters, alleys, abandoned houses. You want to know where my true loyalties lie? Not with any king or queen, but with the people. The people, who suffer under despots and prosper under just rule, the people whose hearts you aim to win."
(Convincing Argument)
Samwell sneaks into Jorah's room to try an experimental Greyscale treatment on him, despite Archmaester Ebrose's forbidding him to do so. (Executive Decision)
Samwell's letter is the final straw that convinces Jon Snow to ally with Daenerys Targaryen.

"This message was sent to me by Samwell Tarly. He was my brother at the Night's Watch. A man I trust as much as anyone in this world. He's discovered proof that Dragonstone sits on a mountain of dragonglass."
(Convincing Argument)
39:03 (+3) Jon Snow:
Jon Snow decides that he must go to Dragonstone to meet with Daenerys, despite objections from Sansa and nearly all the Northern lords. "Daenerys is a Queen. Only a King could convince her to help us. It has to be me." (Executive Decision)
Episode 3: The Queen's Justice
40:48 (+3) Jon Snow:
Daenerys grants the cache of Dragonglass to Jon: "I will allow you to mine the Dragonglass and forge weapons from it. Any resources or men you need, I will provide for you." (New Weapon)
submitted by nyan (approved!)
Episode 4: The Spoils of War
23:05 (+3) Jon Snow:
Jon reveals the ancient petroglyphs carved into the obsidian cave at Dragonstone, showing the Children of the Forest and the First Men fighting together against the White Walkers.

"There is something else I want to show you, Your Grace. The children of the forest made these. ... A very long time ago. They were right here, standing where we're standing. Before there were Targaryens or Starks or Lannisters. ... They were here together, the children and the First Men.
... They fought together against their common enemy. Despite their differences, despite their suspicions. Together. We need to do the same if we're going to survive. Because the enemy is real. It's always been real."
(Secret Discovery)
Episode 5: Eastwatch
0:00 (+3) Jon Snow:
Gendry enthusiastically pledges to follow Jon Snow beyond the Wall to take on the White Walkers. (New Follower/Prisoner)
The Night King breaks Bran's warg connection to his ravens, dispersing the scouting flock sent north of the Wall. (Victorious Battle)
26:59 (+3) Jon Snow:
Over Davos' and Daenerys' protests, Jon decides that he'll personally lead the expedition north of the Wall to capture a wight.

Davos Seaworth: "You can't lead a raid beyond the Wall. You're not in the Night's Watch anymore, you're King in the North."
Jon: "I'm the only one here who's fought them. I'm the only one here who knows them."
Daenerys: "I haven't given you permission to leave."
Jon: "With respect, Your Grace, I don't need your permission. I am a King."
(Executive Decision)
Samwell steals several books and records from the restricted area of the library and abandons the Citadel with Gilly and little Sam.

Gilly: "Are you sure you want to do this? You always wanted to be a Maester."
Samwell: "I'm tired of reading about the achievements of better men."
(Act of Betrayal)
Littlefinger acquires the only copy of a raven letter written by Sansa while she was in King's Landing, when she was compelled by Cersei to ask Robb Stark to come south and bend the knee.

Maester Wolkan: "I found it, my Lord. It took some searching. Maester Luwin's archives are very thorough."
Petyr: "You're sure this is the only copy in Winterfell?
Wolkan: "Yes, my Lord."
Petyr: "Lady Stark thanks you for your service."
(Secret Discovery)
Littlefinger has been using Maester Wolkan to dig through the Winterfell archives, portraying it as a command by Sansa Stark.

Maester Wolkan: "I found it, my Lord. It took some searching. Maester Luwin's archives are very thorough."
Petyr: "You're sure this is the only copy in Winterfell?
Wolkan: "Yes, my Lord."
Petyr: "Lady Stark thanks you for your service."
(Act of Betrayal)
57:14 (+3) Jon Snow:
Jon silences the squabbling in the Eastwatch cells and recruits the prisoners into his expedition.

Jon: "He's right. We're all on the same side."
Gendry: "How can we be?"
Jon: "We're all breathing."
(Convincing Argument)
Episode 6: Beyond the Wall
Beric says a brief prayer for Thoros after they discover him perished in the night. "Lord of Light, show us the way. Come to us in our darkness and lead your servant into the light ... Lord of Light, come to us in our darkness. For the night is dark and full of terrors." (House Words)
submitted by nyan (approved!)
The Night King's Army of the Dead overwhelm Jon Snow's party, forcing them to evacuate by dragon and taking down one of Daenerys Targaryen's dragons, Viserion, in the process. (Victorious Battle)
After having Viseron's body salvaged from the icy lake, the Night King reanimates the dragon as a wight. (New Follower/Prisoner)
Episode 7: The Dragon and the Wolf
26:54 (+3) Jon Snow:
In what is universally regarded as a terrible idea by all sides, Jon single-handedly dissolves the Lannister-Targaryen truce in the name of honor and hopefully getting into Daenerys' pants later.

Cersei: "In return, the King in the North will extend this truce. He will remain in the North where he belongs. He will not take up arms against the Lannisters. He will not choose sides. ... I know Ned Stark's son will be true to his word."
Jon Snow: "I am true to my word. Or I try to be. That is why I cannot give you what you ask. I cannot serve two queens. And I have already pledged myself to Queen Daenerys of House Targaryen."
(Executive Decision)
45:47 (+3) Jon Snow:
Jon convinces Daenerys to sail with him to the North, rather than flying on her own.

"It's your decision, Your Grace. But if we're going to be allies in this war, it's important for the Northerners to see us as allies. If we sail to White Harbor together, I think it sends a better message."
(Convincing Argument)
Sam puts the pieces of Bran's visions about Jon Snow's parentage together, remembering what Gilly told him at the Citadel about Rhaegar Targaryen's secret wedding.

"At the Citadel, I transcribed a High Septon's diary. He annulled Rhaegar's marriage to Elia. He wed Rhaegar and Lyanna in a secret ceremony."
(Secret Discovery)
Insults Delivered / Funny Lines
Episode 1: Dragonstone
14:58 (+3) Jon Snow:
Sansa Stark: "They respect you, they really do, but you have to- Why are you laughing?"
Jon Snow: "What did father used to say? Everything before the word 'but' is horse shit."
(Witty Insult)
submitted by andrei.sias (approved!)
Episode 2: Stormborn
to Theon, as she gets between Yara's legs: "Why are you standing all the way over there then? The foreign invasion is underway." (Funny Line)
Episode 3: The Queen's Justice
on Cersei: "She's a disease, I regret my role in spreading it. You will too." (Witty Insult)
submitted by megan.m.rabuse (approved!)
on Joffrey Baratheon: "He really was a cunt, wasn't he?" (Funny Line)
submitted by megan.m.rabuse (approved!)
6:05 (+3) Jon Snow:
Tyrion: "She's much smarter than she lets on."
Jon: "She's starting to let on."
(Funny Line)
12:54 (+3) Jon Snow:
Daenerys Targaryen: "Did you see three dragons flying overhead when you arrived? ... and did you see the Dothraki, all of whom have sworn to kill for me?"
Jon: "They're hard to miss."
(Funny Line)
submitted by nyan (approved!)
Jaime Lannister: "There are always lessons in failures."
Olenna Tyrell: "Yes. You must be very wise by now."
(Witty Insult)
Episode 5: Eastwatch
16:04 (+3) Jon Snow:
Jon and Daenerys discuss her dragons.

Daenerys: "They're beautiful, aren't they?"
Jon: "It wasn't the word I was thinking of, but... but, yes, they are. Gorgeous beasts."
(Funny Line)
23:05 (+3) Varys:
Tyrion: "She gave Tarly a choice, a man who had taken up arms against her. What else could she do?"
Varys: "Not burn him alive alongside his son?"
(Funny Line)
24:16 (+3) Varys:
Tyrion: "Who's that (raven letter) for?"
Varys: "Jon Snow."
Tyrion: "Did you read it?"
Varys: "It's a sealed scroll for the King in the North."
...
Tyrion: "What's it say?"
Varys: "Nothing good."
(Funny Line)
Gilly: "Guess how many windows are in the Great Sept of Baelor.
Sam: "None anymore."
(Funny Line)
Sam goes on a rant to Gilly about the order of Maesters: "We can all become slavering, murderous imbeciles in thrall to evil incarnate as long as we can have access to the full records of High Septon Maynard's 15,782 shits!" (Witty Insult)
submitted by hkeseyan (approved!)
Episode 6: Beyond the Wall
4:16 (+3) Jon Snow:
Tormund Giantsbane: "I can breathe again. Down south the air smells like pigshit."
Jon Snow: "You've never been down south."
Tormund: "I've been to Winterfell."
Jon: "That's the North."
(Funny Line)
Episode 7: The Dragon and the Wolf
Sam: "What happened to you beyond the Wall?"
Bran Stark: "I became the Three-Eyed Raven."
Sam: "Ohhh! ...I don't know what that means."
(Funny Line)
Glasses of Wine Consumed
Episode 2: Stormborn
Samwell takes a hearty swig of the rum he gives to Jorah, before attempting the Greyscale surgery. (Glass of Wine Consumed)
Ellaria tries out the beverages stocked by the Greyjoy fleet. "How can you drink this piss? When we reach Sunspear I'll treat you to a Dornish Red, the best in the world." (Glass of Wine Consumed)
Episode 3: The Queen's Justice
Olenna drinks the glass of poisoned wine provided by Jaime, after the Tyrells are defeated at Highgarden.

Olenna: "Will there be pain?"
Jaime: "No, I made sure of that."
Olenna: "That's good."
(Glass of Wine Consumed)
Episode 5: Eastwatch
23:32 (+5) Varys:
Varys takes Tyrion wine cup and downs it while recollecting his days as the Mad Kind Aerys' adviser.

"I found the traitors, but I wasn't the one burning them alive. I was only a purveyor of information. It's what I told myself when I watched them beg for mercy - I'm not the one doing it. When the pitch of their screams rose higher - I'm not the one doing it. When their hair caught fire and the smell of their burning flesh filled the throne room - I'm not the one doing it."
(Glass of Wine Consumed)
Acts of Intercourse
Episode 7: The Dragon and the Wolf
61:12 (+10) Jon Snow:
Jon Snow's ignites his latent Targaryen instincts to incest with his aunt Daenerys aboard her ship as they sail for White Harbor. (Act of Intercourse)
Deaths
Episode 5: Eastwatch
Jaime confirms the death of Olenna Tyrell from the poisoned wine she takes after the Tyrell defeat at Highgarden. "It was Olenna. She confessed before she died." (Death)
Episode 7: The Dragon and the Wolf
Littlefinger has his throat slit by Arya Stark, after his betrayals and treason are exposed by Sansa Stark in the court of Winterfell to the Northern and Vale lords.

Sansa: "Thank you for all your many lessons, Lord Baelish. I will never forget them."
(Death)
Special
Episode 1: Dragonstone
Meera gives a slight push to Bran's sledge for appearances sake, as two members of the Night's Watch tow Bran through the gates at Castle Black. (Special)
Sam does some late night studying with his pirated JSTOR copies of the restricted Maester books. (Special)
Sam begins writing a raven letter to Jon to inform him of the cache of dragonglass buried beneath Dragonstone. (Special)
Episode 2: Stormborn
10:48 (+3) Jon Snow:
Sansa reading Tyrion's letter to Jon Snow: "All dwarves are bastards in their father's eyes." (Special)
to Tyrion: "My greatest regret is that Oberyn died fighting for you." (Special)
Samwell mentions that he has potentially found a treatment option for Jorah Mormont's greyscale in a book. "I found the procedure in a study of rare diseases by Archmaester Pylos". (Special)
Samwell opens up Archmaester Pylos' tome on Rare Diseases, which contains the instructions for the Greyscale treatment he is to perform on Jorah. (Special)
Episode 3: The Queen's Justice
3:56 (+3) Jon Snow:
Tyrion Lannister greets Jon on his arrival at Dragonstone: "The Bastard of Winterfell." (Special)
16:54 (+3) Jon Snow:
Davos Seaworth: "He was named King in the North. Not because of his birthright. He has no birthright. He's a damn bastard." (Special)
Episode 4: The Spoils of War
32:38 (+3) Jon Snow:
Missandei: "Forgive me, but may I ask a question? ... Your name is Jon Snow, but your father's name is Ned Stark?"
Jon Snow: "I'm a bastard. My mother and father weren't married."
(Special)
Episode 5: Eastwatch
Sam reads from a book as he transcribes it onto a fresh set of paper, before handing it over to Baby Sam. (Special)
submitted by hkeseyan (approved!)
Episode 6: Beyond the Wall
Beric lights his sword on fire as the wight bear descends on the party. (Special)
submitted by nyan (approved!)
Beric lights up his flaming sword to cremate the remains of Thoros of Myr. (Special)
Beric lights up his firesaber as the wight army approaches over the re-frozen ice. (Special)
54:59 (+3) Jon Snow:
Jon Snow drops Longclaw on the frozen ice sheet after he is tackled under water by the wights during the dragon evacuation. (Special)
The Feels
Episode 5: Eastwatch
15:08 (+0) Jon Snow:
Jon Snow, secret Targaryen, shares a moment and boops le snoot of the fierce and beautiful - gorgeous!, actually - Drogon. (Warm Fuzzy Moment)