Notice: MemcachePool::get(): Server localhost (tcp 11211, udp 0) failed with: Connection refused (111) in /var/www/html/fantasora.com/public_html/src/Cache/Cache.php on line 70
The Wolves | Fantasora

The Wolves

Kill the Queen

Owner: michohelou

0-0, 25 roto pts (#4)
Z-Score: -0.539 (percentile: 29.48%)
Weeks at #1: 0
Categories won: Insults Delivered / Funny Lines (93)
Best Week: Episode 4: The Spoils of War (+3.5 roto points)
Team MVP: Jaime Lannister (picked #6, 87 points, 29.19% of team total)
Longest winstreak: W-0

Roster Stats

Character Drafted Total Kills Politics Insults Wine Sex Thrones Deaths Special Feels
The second of the Lannister children, he is Cersei's lover and twin brother, and also the father of her three (now deceased) bastard children, the supposed sons and daughters of the late King Robert Baratheon. He also serves as Lord Commander of the Kingsguard.
#6 87 8 33 12 5 20 0 0 9 0
A fearsome Lannister knight, formerly known as the Hound. After being left for dead after losing a fight with Brienne of Tarth, he recovered and briefly reformed as a laborer in a nonviolent commune, but has joined with Beric Dondarrion and the Brotherhood without Banners after bandits attack and destroy the village.
#15 82 47 6 24 5 0 0 0 0 0
A former sellsword, who has risen through the ranks of nobility thanks to his fighting skills and work for the Lannisters. He has accompanied Jaime Lannister on his missions to Dorne and Riverrun.
#16 69 21 9 33 0 0 0 0 6 0
The youngest of the Stark girls. Recently having completed her training as an assassin in the House of Black and White, she has set sail to return to Westeros to pursue her revenge.
#5 54 10 18 21 5 0 0 0 0 0
A Red Priestess from Asshai, Melisandre has demonstrated mythical skill in blood magic, most recently reviving a deceased Jon Snow. After Davos Seaworth exposes her live sacrifice of the child Shireen Baratheon, she has been exiled by Jon Snow.
#26 6 0 3 3 0 0 0 0 0 0
A squire in the service of Brienne of Tarth. He previously served as Tyrion Lannister's squire.
#25 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0
Totals 298 86 69 93 15 20 0 0 15 0

Roster

charId Character Special
6
The youngest of the Stark girls. Recently having completed her training as an assassin in the House of Black and White, she has set sail to return to Westeros to pursue her revenge.
* Nymeria's actions contribute to her points.
* +1 point for reciting her hitlist
* adopting a new Faceless Man disguise
19
The second of the Lannister children, he is Cersei's lover and twin brother, and also the father of her three (now deceased) bastard children, the supposed sons and daughters of the late King Robert Baratheon. He also serves as Lord Commander of the Kingsguard.
* +1 point for awkward waves with his metal hand
* +1 point when he uses his metal hand in a combat situation
* +1 point when someone (excl. Cersei) references incest with Cersei or her childrens' bastardy directly to him
* 2x multiplier for sex acts involving incest (first cousin or closer)
81
A fearsome Lannister knight, formerly known as the Hound. After being left for dead after losing a fight with Brienne of Tarth, he recovered and briefly reformed as a laborer in a nonviolent commune, but has joined with Beric Dondarrion and the Brotherhood without Banners after bandits attack and destroy the village.
* +1 point for scenes where he eats
* 2x multiplier for actions performed while confronted by fire
23
A former sellsword, who has risen through the ranks of nobility thanks to his fighting skills and work for the Lannisters. He has accompanied Jaime Lannister on his missions to Dorne and Riverrun.
+1 point when he gives expert critique/advice on fighting strategy
27
A squire in the service of Brienne of Tarth. He previously served as Tyrion Lannister's squire.
+1 point for failed attempts at basic tasks.
+1 point for surprising people with how good he is at a task
52
A Red Priestess from Asshai, Melisandre has demonstrated mythical skill in blood magic, most recently reviving a deceased Jon Snow. After Davos Seaworth exposes her live sacrifice of the child Shireen Baratheon, she has been exiled by Jon Snow.
* +1 point for mentioning that "the night is dark and full of terrors" * +1 each time she mentions a vision she sees in the flames
Kills
Episode 1: Dragonstone
2:41 (+94) Arya Stark:
Masquerading as Walder Frey, Arya serves poisoned wine to a host of 47 Freys in the same dining hall where Robb and Catelyn were murdered at the Red Wedding.

"But you didn't slaughter every one of the Starks. No, no, that was your mistake. You should have ripped them all out, root and stem. Leave one wolf alive and the sheep are never safe. When people ask you what happened here tell them the North remembers. Tell them winter came for House Frey."
(Kill of Unnamed Character)
100:00 (+-11) Arya Stark:
Scoring adjustment to cap performance to 100pts. (Manual Adjustment)
Episode 4: The Spoils of War
44:16 (+2) Bronn:
Bronn unsheathes a sword out of the torso of an impaled, flailing Lannister soldier, inflicting the fatal damage on the way out. (Kill of Unnamed Character)
44:18 (+4) Bronn:
Bronn runs through the chaos of the battlefield to make his way over to the Scorpion, cutting down two Dothraki screamers with the sword he takes from the torso of an impaled Lannister soldier. (Kill of Unnamed Character)
44:56 (+10) Bronn:
Bronn blows away the Dothraki screamer with a bolt from the Scorpion. (Kill of Named Character)
47:34 (+5) Bronn:
After a miss on his first shot, Bronn strikes a bolt from the Scorpio into Drogon's right shoulder, sending him spiraling out of control and forcing Daenerys to the ground. (Major Injury of Named Character)
Episode 6: Beyond the Wall
The Hound shatters the jaw of a wight with one hell of an accurate rock throw. "Dumb cunt." (Major Injury of Unnamed Character)
The Hound secures the cargo by impaling the wight onto one of Drogon's spines for the flight out. (Major Injury of Unnamed Character)
Episode 7: The Dragon and the Wolf
After revealing the wight to the audience in King's Landing, Sandor Clegane reels back its chain and bisects the wight as it charges him. (Major Injury of Unnamed Character)
59:58 (+10) Arya Stark:
Arya slits a groveling Littlefinger across his throat, after his betrayals and treason are exposed by Sansa in the court of Winterfell to the Northern and Vale lords.

Sansa: "Thank you for all your many lessons, Lord Baelish. I will never forget them."
(Kill of Named Character)
Political Wins
Episode 1: Dragonstone
"... so I can tell you my plans for this great house, now that Winter has come". (House Words)
While looking into Thoros' flames, Sandor Clegane discovers the location of the planned White Walker invasion: Eastwatch-by-the-Sea.

"Ice.  A wall of ice.  The Wall. ... It's where the Wall meets the sea.  There's a castle there.  There's a mountain.  Looks like an arrowhead.  The dead are marching past.  Thousands of them."
(Secret Discovery)
submitted by jake.kmiech (approved!)
Episode 2: Stormborn
Arya encounters Nymeria in the forest, where she leads her own pack of wolves. (Acquire a New Castle/City/Army/Loot)
submitted by ssantise (approved!)
Melisandre meets with Daenerys Targaryen, imploring her to meet and ally with Jon Snow for the war to come against the White Walkers. (Convincing Argument)
Episode 3: The Queen's Justice
After seizing Highgarden, the defeated Olenna Tyrell sits in her prisoner as a prisoner of Jaime Lannister. (New Follower/Prisoner)
submitted by nyan (approved!)
Jaime's offer to Randyll Tarly to rebel against the Tyrells appears to have been accepted, as the Tarly's ride with the Lannister army on the assault on Highgarden. (Convincing Argument)
Randyll Tarly allies with the Lannisters, taking Jaime Lannister's offer to become Warden of the South and marching with the Lannister army against the Tyrells. (New Follower/Prisoner)
Jaime walks through the courtyards of Highgarden, where the Lannister army has been victorious in seizing the castle. (Victorious Battle)
Jaime walks through the courtyards of Highgarden, where the Lannister army has been victorious in seizing the castle. (Acquire a New Castle/City/Army/Loot)
Jaime is in possession of the Valyrian steel sword, Widow's Wail. "How will you do it? With that sword? That was Joffrey's sword, wasn't it? Not that he ever used it. What did he call it?" Jaime: "Widow's Wail." (New Weapon)
In her dying moments, Olenna Tyrell reveals to Jaime that she was Joffrey's killer.

"I'd hate to die like your son. Clawing at my neck, foam and bile spilling from my mouth, eyes bloodred, skin purple. Must have been horrible for you, as a Kingsguard, as a father. It was horrible enough for me ... You see, I had never seen the poison work before. Tell Cersei. I want her to know it was me."
(Secret Discovery)
submitted by nyan (approved!)
Episode 4: The Spoils of War
Jaime acquires all of the Tyrell gold after taking Highgarden, although it is bound for the Iron Bank. (Acquire a New Castle/City/Army/Loot)
submitted by nyan (approved!)
Arya convinces the Winterfell guards to allow her into the castle: "I'm getting into this castle one way or another. If I'm not who I say I am, I won't last long. But if I am, and Sansa finds you've turned me away..." (Convincing Argument)
At the Stark sibling reunion party, Bran regifts Littlefinger's Valyrian steel dagger to Arya.

Arya: "Are you sure? It's Valyrian steel."
Bran: "It's wasted on a cripple."
(New Weapon)
Arya asserts that Brienne's vow means that she serves her as well, compelling her to engage in a sparring match. "You swore to serve both my mother's daughters, didn't you?" (New Follower/Prisoner)
45:01 (+3) Bronn:
Bronn arrives to the wagon and unveils the Scorpion, a high-powered dragon-killing ballista. (New Weapon)
Episode 5: Eastwatch
Jaime is taken by Bronn to the dungeons beneath the Red Keep, where he finds his fugitive brother Tyrion who has arranged a meeting with him there. (Secret Discovery)
submitted by hindsight44 (approved!)
32:25 (+3) Bronn:
Bronn finds Tyrion in the dungeons below the Red Keep, later arranging a secret meeting between him and Jaime. (Secret Discovery)
submitted by hindsight44 (approved!)
After Jaime and Tyrion's secret meeting, Cersei agrees to the truce with Daenerys while they await for Jon to return with proof of the White Walker situation.

Cersei: "I've come to believe that an accommodation with the Dragon Queen could be in our immediate interest. She has the numbers. If we want to beat her, we have to be clever. We have to fight her like Father would have."
(Deals Brokered)
Arya breaks into Littlefinger's chambers and discovers the hidden raven letter, a note from Sansa Stark while she was held captive in King's Landing, asking Robb Stark to come south and bend the knee. (Secret Discovery)
Episode 6: Beyond the Wall
The Hound wields Gendry's warhammer, after Tormund forced him to leave it behind for the group so Gendry could make the marathon run back to Eastwatch faster. (New Weapon)
Sandor loads the prized captured wight into a boat headed for King's Landing. (New Follower/Prisoner)
Arya catches Sansa in the act of searching through her room for the copy of the compromising raven letter. "Not what you're looking for?" (Secret Discovery)
Episode 7: The Dragon and the Wolf
After a private meeting with Tyrion, Cersei agrees to a truce with the Targaryen and Northern forces so that they may collectively combat the White Walker threat, completing the deal brokered by Tyrion, Jaime, and Bronn's secret meeting. (Deals Brokered)
submitted by nyan (approved!)
40:01 (+3) Bronn:
After a private meeting with Tyrion, Cersei agrees to a truce with the Targaryen and Northern forces so that they may collectively combat the White Walker threat, completing the deal brokered by Tyrion, Jaime, and Bronn's secret meeting. (Deals Brokered)
submitted by nyan (approved!)
Insults Delivered / Funny Lines
Episode 1: Dragonstone
"But you didn't slaughter every one of the Starks. No, no, that was your mistake. You should have ripped them all out, root and stem. Leave one wolf alive and the sheep are never safe. When people ask you what happened here tell them the North remembers. Tell them winter came for House Frey." (Threat)
Jaime: "How are they better allies? How are they different from the Freys? They both broke their promises and murdered their former friends as soon as it suited them."
Cersei: "So does everyone, when it suits them. Unlike the Freys, they have ships, and they're good at killing."
Jaime: "They're not good at anything."
(Witty Insult)
submitted by alicehanners (approved!)
Thoros: "Bad night to be outdoors."
Sandor: "You've got real powerful magic to figure that out. Did the Lord of Light whisper that in your ear? 'It's snowwing, Thoros.
It's winnndy. It's gonna be a coold night.'"
(Funny Line)
Thoros: "Why are you always in such a foul mood?"
Sandor: "... Experience."
(Funny Line)
"It's my fucking luck I end up with a band of fire-worshippers" -as Thoros beckons him over to check out the magic prophecy fire he just started (Funny Line)
Episode 2: Stormborn
Hot Pie: "You've been making pies?"
Arya: "One or two." (in reference to her Frey pies)
(Funny Line)
submitted by ssantise (approved!)
Randyll Tarly: "Ser Jaime, I believe you know my son."
Jaime: "Rickon, isn't it?"
Dickon: "Dickon."
Jaime: "That's it." (walks past Dickon to speak with Randyll)
(Funny Line)
Episode 3: The Queen's Justice
to Varys: "I will return, dear Spider, one last time. I have to die in this strange country... just like you." (Threat)
submitted by hindsight44 (approved!)
Episode 4: The Spoils of War
0:00 (+3) Bronn:
Jaime to Bronn: Besides think of the upkeep, the more you own the more it weighs you down.

Bronn To Jaime: Is that why you're so glum eh? All your new riches weighing you down?
(Witty Insult)
submitted by hindsight44 (approved!)
3:55 (+3) Bronn:
to Jaime: "You've just won the biggest prize in the world, what do you possibly have to be upset about? C'mon you can tell me - the Queen of Thorns give you one last prick in the balls before saying goodbye?" (Witty Insult)
Bronn: "You've just won the biggest prize in the world, what do you possibly have to be upset about? C'mon you can tell me - the Queen of Thorns give you one last prick in the balls before saying goodbye?"
Jaime: "I'll save my confessions for the High Septon."
Bronn: "There is no more High Septon."
Jaime: "No, there isn't, is there?"
(Comeback)
to Bronn: "Ser Bronn of the Blackwater, formerly of... whatever nameless shit-heap you're from... with a saddleback full of gold, complaining about not getting paid." (Witty Insult)
Brienne: "You can't use that, My Lady, it's too small." (referring to Arya's sword, Needle)
Arya: "I won't cut you, don't worry."
(Threat)
37:28 (+3) Bronn:
to Dickon Tarly: "Men shit themselves when they die, didn't they teach you that at fancy lad school?" (Witty Insult)
Episode 5: Eastwatch
4:22 (+3) Bronn:
to Jaime: "Listen to me, cunt. Until I get what I'm owed, a dragon doesn't get to kill you. You don't get to kill you. Only I get to kill you." (Funny Line)
4:35 (+3) Bronn:
Jaime: "That was only one of them. She has two more. If she decides to use them, to really use them-"
Bronn: "You're fucked."
Jaime: "Don't you mean we're fucked?"
Bronn: "No, I do not."
(Funny Line)
4:45 (+3) Bronn:
Bronn: "Dragons are where our partnership ends. I'm not gonna be around when those things start spitting fire on King's Landing."
Jaime: "I have to tell Cersei."
Bronn: "May as well jump back in that river."
(Funny Line)
31:51 (+3) Bronn:
Jaime: "We don't have time for this, we should be preparing the city for a siege. The Dothraki are coming."
Bronn: "All the more reason for you to train. Unless you plan on fighting Dothraki twelve-year-olds."
(Witty Insult)
32:04 (+3) Bronn:
Jaime: "Why (do swordfight training) down here?"
Bronn: "I don't think you want people to see how you look swinging that thing yet."
(Witty Insult)
The Hound interrupts Beric's grand monologue.

Beric: "It doesn't matter what we think our reasons are. There's a greater purpose at work. And we serve it together, whether we know it or not. We may take the steps, but the Lord of Light-"
Hound: "For fuck's sake, will you shut your hole? Are we coming with you or not?"
(Funny Line)
Episode 6: Beyond the Wall
Gendry recaps his ordeal after being sold to the Red Priestess Melisandre.

Gendry: "You know what she did to me? She strapped me down on the bed, she stripped me naked-"
Sandor: "Sounds alright so far."
(Funny Line)
Gendry: "She wanted to kill me. And would have killed me if it weren't for-"
Sandor: "But they didn't, did they? So what you whinging about?"
Gendry: "I'm not whinging."
Sandor: "Your lips are moving and you complain about something. That's whinging. This one's been killed six times and you don't hear him bitching about it."
(Witty Insult)
to Sansa: "What would little Lyanna Mormont say? She's younger than you were when you wrote this. Are you going to say 'But I was just a child'?" (Threat)
Sansa Stark: "You're angry. Sometimes anger makes people do unfortunate things."
Arya: "Sometimes fear makes them do unfortunate things. I'll go with anger."
(Comeback)
Sandor: "You want to suck my dick, is that it?"
Tormund Giantsbane: "Dick?"
Sandor: "Cock."
Tormund: "Ah, dick. I like it."
Sandor: "Bet you do.
(Funny Line)
Tormund: "I want to make babies with her - think of them. Great big monsters. They'd conquer the world."
Sandor: "How did a mad fucker like you live this long?"
(Funny Line)
Beric Dondarrion, as they part ways at Eastwatch: "We'll meet again, Clegane."
Sandor: "Fucking hope not."
(Funny Line)
Sansa Stark: " I have hundreds of men here at Winterfell, all loyal to me."
Arya: "They're not here now."
(Threat)
to Sansa: "Neither of us got to be the other person, did we? The world doesn't just let girls decide what they are going to be. But I can now. With the faces I can choose. I can become someone else. Speak in their voice, live in their skin. I can even become you. I wonder what it would feel like to wear those pretty dresses. To be the Lady of Winterfell. All I'd need to find out is your face." (Threat)
Episode 7: The Dragon and the Wolf
4:44 (+3) Bronn:
Bronn and Jaime discuss the Unsullied army standing outside the gates of King's Landing.

Bronn: "Men without cocks. You wouldn't find me fighting in an army if I had no cock. What's left to fight for?"
Jaime: "Gold?"
Bronn: "I spent my life around soldiers. What do you think they spend that gold on?"
Jaime: "Family."
Bronn: "Not without a cock, you don't."
(Funny Line)
Bronn and Jaime discuss the Unsullied army standing outside the gates of King's Landing.

Bronn: "Men without cocks. You wouldn't find me fighting in an army if I had no cock. What's left to fight for?"
Jaime: "Gold?"
Bronn: "I spent my life around soldiers. What do you think they spend that gold on?"
Jaime: "Family."
Bronn: "Not without a cock, you don't."
Jaime: "Maybe it really is all cocks in the end"
(Funny Line)
submitted by kevinpetsky (approved!)
9:28 (+3) Bronn:
Bronn breaks up the Podrick and Tyrion reunion

Podrick: "I never thought I'd see you again, my lord."
Tyrion: "Supporting the enemy, no less."
Podrick: "Hard to blame you."
Tyrion: 'Cersei will anyway."
Podrick: "I'm glad you're alive."
Bronn: "Come on. You can suck his magic cock later."
(Witty Insult)
11:17 (+3) Bronn:
Tyrion Lannister: "Are you? Helping me to arrange this meeting wasn't exactly looking after yourself, was it? You put yourself at risk."
Bronn: "I put yourself at risk. Important difference. It's your head Queen Cersei's offered a bag of gold for, it's not mine. Now, thanks to me, she's got two traitors' heads coming right through her door. She can lop them both off as soon as she gets tired of the clever words that pour out their pieholes. All thanks to Ser Bronn of the fucking Blackwater. If that's not looking after myself, I don't know what is."
(Threat)
submitted by hindsight44 (approved!)
Sandor Clegane: "Am I going to die in this shit city?"
Tyrion Lanniser: "You might."
Sandor: "And this is all your idea. Seems every bad idea has some Lannister cunt behind it."
(Witty Insult)
Sansa Stark: "You stand accused of murder. You stand accused of treason. How do you answer these charges... Lord Baelish?"
Petyr Baelish: "...?"
Arya: "My sister asked you a question."
(Threat)
Glasses of Wine Consumed
Episode 1: Dragonstone
Arya shares in some blackberry wine offered by the camp of Lannister soldiers. (Glass of Wine Consumed)
Episode 2: Stormborn
Arya goes for the ale after Hot Pie probes further into what she's been up to. (Glass of Wine Consumed)
Episode 3: The Queen's Justice
Jaime takes a drink in Cersei's chambers as we all try to collectively erase the imagery of Euron sticking Cersei with the pointy end. (Glass of Wine Consumed)
Episode 6: Beyond the Wall
The Hound gets one short swig in before Jon ruins the party and takes back the flask. "We have to burn the body." (Glass of Wine Consumed)
Acts of Intercourse
Episode 3: The Queen's Justice
Jaime gets his trousers dropped as Cersei is feeling extra thirsty after another exhilarating session of dungeon torturing her enemies. (Act of Intercourse)
Special
Episode 1: Dragonstone
Arya peels off the mask of Walder Frey to reveal herself after assassinating the host of Freys in the dining hall at the Twins. (Special)
submitted by nyan (approved!)
Euron Greyjoy: "Ever since I was a little boy, I wanted to grow up and marry the most beautiful woman in the world, so here I am with a thousand ships and two good hands." (looks at Jaime) (Special)
submitted by xdwxrd (approved!)
Sandor takes a bite out of some pocket jerky.   (Special)
Episode 3: The Queen's Justice
Euron asks Jaime for advice on pleasing Cersei: "Does she like it gentle, or rough? A finger in the bum? Shh, shh, shh, shh, not now. We'll talk later." (Special)
Olenna Tyrell: "I'd hate to die like your son. Clawing at my neck, foam and bile spilling from my mouth, eyes blood red, skin purple. Must have been horrible for you, as a Kingsguard, as a father." (Special)
Episode 4: The Spoils of War
39:38 (+3) Bronn:
Bronn: "Get back to King's Landing."
Jaime Lannister: "I'm not abandoning my army."
Bronn: "You're the commander, not a damn infantryman. Those fuckers are about to swamp us."
(Special)
submitted by hindsight44 (approved!)
Jamie uses his golden hand to block a strike from an attacking Dothraki. (Special)
submitted by cyprus05 (approved!)
Episode 7: The Dragon and the Wolf
4:14 (+3) Bronn:
Bran reviews the defensive preparations for Daenerys' armed arrival to King's Landing.

Bronn: "Oil?"
Lannister soldier: "Pitch, my lord."
Bronn: "How many barrels?"
Soldier: "500, my lord."
Bronn: "Get 500 more."
(Special)
The Feels
Episode 4: The Spoils of War
While watching on as the living Stark children together in the courtyard of Winterfell:

Podrick: "Catelyn Stark would be proud. You've kept your vow."
Brienne: "I did next to nothing."
Podrick: "You're too hard on yourself, My Lady."
Brienne: "I'm not- ...thank you, Podrick."
(Warm Fuzzy Moment)