Matchup: The King of the Course (Mario Kart Course that is) vs The Lord of Tight for Ep 2
8th Floor of the Red Keep
Political Wins
Insults Delivered / Funny Lines
12:40
(+3)
Tyrion Lannister:
Tyrion comments on the Lannister brothers reunion as they are spat upon by Northerners.
"Well, here we are... together again. And the masses rejoice." (Funny Line)
"Well, here we are... together again. And the masses rejoice." (Funny Line)
13:41
(+3)
Tyrion Lannister:
Jaime: "Don't be too hard on yourself. She fooled me more than anybody."
Tyrion: "She never fooled you. You always knew exactly what she was. And you loved her anyway." (Witty Insult)
Tyrion: "She never fooled you. You always knew exactly what she was. And you loved her anyway." (Witty Insult)
14:06
(+3)
Tyrion Lannister:
Tyrion: "So, we're going to die. At Winterfell. Not the death I would've chosen. I always pictured myself dying in my own bed, at the age of 80, with a belly fully of wine and a [in unison with Jaime] girl's mouth around my cock."
(Funny Line)
14:06
(+3)
Jaime Lannister:
Tyrion: "So, we're going to die. At Winterfell. Not the death I would've chosen. I always pictured myself dying in my own bed, at the age of 80, with a belly fully of wine and a [in unison with Jaime] girl's mouth around my cock."
(Funny Line)
16:11
(+3)
Jaime Lannister:
Brienne: "What are you doing? ... We have never had a conversation last this long without you insulting me, not once."
Jaime: "You want me to insult you?" (Funny Line)
Jaime: "You want me to insult you?" (Funny Line)
30:43
(+3)
Tyrion Lannister:
Tyrion: "You've had a strange journey."
Bran: "Stranger than most."
Tyrion: "I'd like to hear about it.
Bran: "It's a long story."
Tyrion: "If only we were in a castle, in the middle of winter with nowhere to go." (Funny Line)
Bran: "Stranger than most."
Tyrion: "I'd like to hear about it.
Bran: "It's a long story."
Tyrion: "If only we were in a castle, in the middle of winter with nowhere to go." (Funny Line)
34:58
(+3)
Tyrion Lannister:
to Jaime: "I wish father were here. I would love to see the look on his face when he realizes his two sons are about to die defending Winterfell."
(Funny Line)
submitted by nyan (approved!)
35:33
(+3)
Jaime Lannister:
to Tyrion: "It wasn't so simple. I was sleeping with my sister, and you had one friend in the world - who was sleeping with his sister."
(Funny Line)
36:17
(+3)
Tyrion Lannister:
Brienne: "We didn't meant to interrupt, we were just looking for someplace warm to-"
Tyrion: "-to contemplate your imminent death. You've come to the right place." (Funny Line)
Tyrion: "-to contemplate your imminent death. You've come to the right place." (Funny Line)
submitted by nyan (approved!)
37:26
(+3)
Tormund Giantsbane:
Tyrion: "Would you like a drink?"
Tormund: "Brought my own." [holds up horn of weird milk] (Funny Line)
Tormund: "Brought my own." [holds up horn of weird milk] (Funny Line)
37:35
(+3)
Tormund Giantsbane:
The telephone game of Westerosi epithets makes its way to Tormund.
to Jaime: "They call you Kingkiller." (Funny Line)
to Jaime: "They call you Kingkiller." (Funny Line)
38:27
(+3)
Tormund Giantsbane:
Tormund tells the story of his name, Giantsbane.
"They call me Giantsbane. Want to know why?
I killed a giant when I was 10. Then I climbed right into bed with his wife.
When she woke up, you know what she did? Suckled me at her teat for three months.
Thought I was her baby. That's how I got so strong. Giant's milk." (Funny Line)
"They call me Giantsbane. Want to know why?
I killed a giant when I was 10. Then I climbed right into bed with his wife.
When she woke up, you know what she did? Suckled me at her teat for three months.
Thought I was her baby. That's how I got so strong. Giant's milk." (Funny Line)
to Arya: "You never used to shut up, now you're just sitting there like a mute."
(Funny Line)
As Beric walks by to interrupt the moment between Arya Stark and Sandor:
"Oh for fuck's sake - may as well be at a bloody wedding." (Funny Line)
"Oh for fuck's sake - may as well be at a bloody wedding." (Funny Line)
Beric Dondarrion: "The Lord of Light has brought us together all the same. This is his moment. When light-"
Sandor: "Thoros isn't here anymore, so I hope you're not about to give a sermon. Because if you are, the Lord of Light's gonna wonder why he brought you back 19 times just to watch you die when I chuck you over this fucking wall." (Threat)
Sandor: "Thoros isn't here anymore, so I hope you're not about to give a sermon. Because if you are, the Lord of Light's gonna wonder why he brought you back 19 times just to watch you die when I chuck you over this fucking wall." (Threat)
Gendry with the deflection as he gets grilled by Arya.
Gendry: "Then she (Melisandre) tied me up, stripped me down, put leeches all over me."
Arya: "Was that your first time?"
Gendry: "No, yeah, I've never had leeches put all over my cock." (Funny Line)
Gendry: "Then she (Melisandre) tied me up, stripped me down, put leeches all over me."
Arya: "Was that your first time?"
Gendry: "No, yeah, I've never had leeches put all over my cock." (Funny Line)
46:04
(+3)
Tormund Giantsbane:
to Brienne: "I'm no King, but if I were, I'd knight you ten times over."
(Funny Line)
Glasses of Wine Consumed
34:50
(+5)
Tyrion Lannister:
Tyrion drinks in front of the fireplace at Winterfell as he chats with Jaime. "I wish father were here."
(Glass of Wine Consumed)
36:08
(+5)
Jaime Lannister:
Tyrion raises a toast - "to the perils of self-betterment" and Jaime just gets his lips on the cup as Brienne and Podrick barge in.
(Glass of Wine Consumed)
38:27
(+5)
Tormund Giantsbane:
Tormund shotguns his entire horn of "giants' milk" as it pours down all over his beard to the dismay of Davos and others.
(Glass of Wine Consumed)
submitted by alicehanners (approved!)
Sandor drinks from his wineskin atop the ramparts of Winterfell.
(Glass of Wine Consumed)
45:50
(+5)
Jaime Lannister:
Jaime refills his cup as the fireplace crew talks about the sexism of knighthood in Westeros.
(Glass of Wine Consumed)
Acts of Intercourse
A Game of Thrones
Jon is zoned out in his seat as the rest of the court in Winterfell interrogates Jaime.
(Basic Seat)
30:43
(+1)
Tyrion Lannister:
Tyrion sits down to hear Bran's story.
Bran: "It's a long story."
Tyrion: "If only we were in a castle, in the middle of winter with nowhere to go." (Basic Seat)
Bran: "It's a long story."
Tyrion: "If only we were in a castle, in the middle of winter with nowhere to go." (Basic Seat)
34:50
(+1)
Tyrion Lannister:
Tyrion sits in a chair by the fireplace at Winterfell, chatting with Jaime. "I wish father were here."
(Basic Seat)
34:50
(+1)
Jaime Lannister:
Jaime sits in front of the fireplace in Winterfell with Tyrion.
(Basic Seat)
36:55
(+1)
Jaime Lannister:
Jaime sits back down on his chair after inviting their new guests around the fireplace.
(Basic Seat)
37:55
(+1)
Tormund Giantsbane:
Tormund sits down to regale the fireplace crew with the story of how he was named Giantsbane.
(Basic Seat)
51:06
(+1)
Tyrion Lannister:
Tyrion sits as Davos declares "we're out of wine" to the fireplace crew.
(Basic Seat)
51:06
(+1)
Jaime Lannister:
Tyrion sits as Davos declares "we're out of wine" to the fireplace crew.
(Basic Seat)
51:10
(+1)
Tormund Giantsbane:
Tormund is sitting as Davos declares "we're out of wine" to the fireplace crew.
(Basic Seat)
Special
Gendry tends to the coals in the forge at Winterfell and starts to hammer a piece of metal.
(Special)
25:55
(+3)
Tormund Giantsbane:
Tormund greets Jon with a bear tackle and calls him "My little Crow."
(Special)
submitted by nyan (approved!)
30:05
(+9)
Tormund Giantsbane:
Tormund gives the eye to Brienne during the battle planning meeting (3 seconds)
"We're all going to die... but at least we die together." (Special)
"We're all going to die... but at least we die together." (Special)
37:11
(+18)
Tormund Giantsbane:
Tormund stares at Brienne as he enters the fireplace room (6 cumulative seconds staring at Brienne). She stares back.
"It could be our last night in this world, you know?" (Special)
"It could be our last night in this world, you know?" (Special)
The Feels
23:25
(+5)
Theon Greyjoy:
Theon and Sansa share a heartfelt hug as he returns to the North with his Ironborn.
"I want to fight for Winterfell, Lady Sansa. If you'll have me." (Warm Fuzzy Moment)
"I want to fight for Winterfell, Lady Sansa. If you'll have me." (Warm Fuzzy Moment)
25:52
(+3)
Tormund Giantsbane:
Tormund bear tackles Jon Snow in the courtyard as the Beyond-the-Wall gang reunites in Winterfell.
(Funny Line)
The three remaining Night's Watch members share some banter and reflect on their beginnings.
Samwell: "Think back to where we started. Us, Grenn, Pyp."
Jon: "Now it's just us three."
Edd: "Last man left, burn the rest of us." (Warm Fuzzy Moment)
Samwell: "Think back to where we started. Us, Grenn, Pyp."
Jon: "Now it's just us three."
Edd: "Last man left, burn the rest of us." (Warm Fuzzy Moment)
38:27
(+3)
Tormund Giantsbane:
Tormund shotguns his entire horn of "giants' milk" as it pours down all over his beard to the dismay of Davos and others.
(Ridiculously Funny Moment)
Arya and the Hound share a drink atop the ramparts of Winterfell.
Arya: "No, I mean, what are you doing up here? You joined the Brotherhood. You went beyond the Wall with Jon. You're here now. Why? When was the last time you fought for anyone but yourself?"
Sandor: "I fought for you, didn't I?" (Warm Fuzzy Moment)
Arya: "No, I mean, what are you doing up here? You joined the Brotherhood. You went beyond the Wall with Jon. You're here now. Why? When was the last time you fought for anyone but yourself?"
Sandor: "I fought for you, didn't I?" (Warm Fuzzy Moment)
47:37
(+5)
Jaime Lannister:
Jaime knights Brienne of Tarth
"In the name of the Warrior, I charge you to be brave.
In the name of the Father, I charge you to be just.
In the name of the Mother, I charge you to defend the innocent.
Arise, Brienne of Tarth - a knight of the Seven Kingdoms." (Warm Fuzzy Moment)
"In the name of the Warrior, I charge you to be brave.
In the name of the Father, I charge you to be just.
In the name of the Mother, I charge you to defend the innocent.
Arise, Brienne of Tarth - a knight of the Seven Kingdoms." (Warm Fuzzy Moment)