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Matchup: The White Wankers vs Schlong in the North for Ep 3 | Fantasora

Character Drafted Total Kills Politics Insults Wine Sex Thrones Deaths Special Feels
Queen of the Seven Kingdoms, after the death of her last remaining child Tommen Baratheon. She suffers from a rare water allergy.
#4 76 5 15 3 10 40 0 0 3 0
The new King of the Iron Islands, after killing his brother Balon Greyjoy. He is described as cunning, ruthless, and with a touch of madness.
#20 30 0 9 12 0 0 0 0 9 0
Recently declared King in the North, he is the bastard son of Ned Stark, and formerly served as Lord Commander of the Night's Watch before he was betrayed by his fellow men.
#1 15 0 3 6 0 0 0 0 6 0
Formerly Hand of the King to Stannis Baratheon, Davos now advises Jon Snow. He is often at odds with the Red Priestess Melisandre.
#21 6 0 0 3 0 0 0 0 3 0
A Red Priestess from Asshai, Melisandre has demonstrated mythical skill in blood magic, most recently reviving a deceased Jon Snow. After Davos Seaworth exposes her live sacrifice of the child Shireen Baratheon, she has been exiled by Jon Snow.
#24 3 0 0 3 0 0 0 0 0 0
A steward of the Night's Watch, Samwell has been sent south to Oldtown to begin his training as a Maester. He is a close friend to Jon Snow, and one of the few people known to have killed a White Walker.
#8 3 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 3 0
The second eldest of the Stark children. After being held as a prisoner of House Bolton, Sansa managed to escape and, with the help of Jon Snow and the Knights of the Vale, defeated Ramsay Bolton to reclaim Winterfell for the Starks. She is a huge fan of lemon cakes.
#9 3 0 0 3 0 0 0 0 0 0
A knight and the head of House Clegane, he serves as a member of the Kingsguard and Cersei's personal muscle. He is a massive and impossibly strong warrior, although he remains speechless and zombie-like ever since being wounded in a Trial by Combat against Oberyn Martell.
#17 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0
The youngest of the Stark girls. Recently having completed her training as an assassin in the House of Black and White, she has set sail to return to Westeros to pursue her revenge.
#13 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0
Lord Protector of the Vale, Littlefinger effectively controls the Knights of the Vale through the easily manipulated Robbin Arryn. He is a master manipulator who will stop at nothing for power.
#16 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0
The fourth of the Stark children. A greenseer and a warg, Bran has mystical visions of the future and past, and has the ability to leap into the minds of others to control them - power he is only beginning to tap into. After having encountered the Three-Eyed Raven and the Night King in the far north, he now flees back south to the Wall.
#5 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0
Formerly the Master of Whisperers in King's Landing, Varys now pulls the political strings for Daenerys Targaryen, arranging alliances with the Westerosi Houses Tyrell and Martell. He controls a vast network of spies.
#12 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0
Totals 136 5 27 30 10 40 0 0 24 0

Character Drafted Total Kills Politics Insults Wine Sex Thrones Deaths Special Feels
The second of the Lannister children, he is Cersei's lover and twin brother, and also the father of her three (now deceased) bastard children, the supposed sons and daughters of the late King Robert Baratheon. He also serves as Lord Commander of the Kingsguard.
#6 52 0 21 0 5 20 0 0 6 0
The leader of the Unsullied - a highly-trained army of freed slaves who serve Daenerys Targaryen.
#10 30 24 6 0 0 0 0 0 0 0
Quick to wit and even quicker to the drink, Tyrion is the youngest of three Lannister children. After being exiled by his sister Cersei, he has joined with Daenerys Targaryen, serving as her Hand of the Queen and most trusted adviser.
#3 21 0 6 15 0 0 0 0 0 0
The matriarch of House Tyrell, Olenna seeks only revenge against the Lannisters after Cersei wiped out nearly all of House Tyrell in the wildfire explosion at the Sept of Baelor. She is known as the "Queen of Thorns" for her sarcasm and wit.
#23 19 5 0 9 5 0 0 0 0 0
Daenerys Stormborn of House Targaryen, Mother of Dragons and Breaker of Chains. With her three dragons and army of Unsullied soldiers she carved out an empire of liberated slave cities in the east, and she now sets her sights westward as she sails for the Seven Kingdoms to reclaim the Iron Throne.
#2 3 0 0 3 0 0 0 0 0 0
The leader of the White Walkers.
#7 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0
A fearsome Lannister knight, formerly known as the Hound. After being left for dead after losing a fight with Brienne of Tarth, he recovered and briefly reformed as a laborer in a nonviolent commune, but has joined with Beric Dondarrion and the Brotherhood without Banners after bandits attack and destroy the village.
#14 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0
Theon's older sister, Yara was raised on the Iron Islands as a true Ironborn. She is a fearsome fighter and commands a longship of her own. After her uncle Euron Greyjoy seizes control of the Iron Islands, she flees with Theon and her loyal troops to ally with Daenerys Targaryen, whose dragons and armies sail west to retake Westeros.
#22 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0
The former paramour of Prince Oberyn. She is also the mother of several of his bastard children, known as the Sand Snakes, and plots revenge against the Lannisters for Oberyn's death. After assassinating Prince Doran and overtaking Dorne, she joins forces with Daenerys Targaryen as she sails west to retake the Iron Throne.
#18 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0
A skilled fighter and heir to House Tarth. After swearing an oath to Catelyn Stark, she continues her mission to ensure the safety of the Stark girls.
#15 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0
Formerly a lieutenant of Mance Rayder, the King beyond the Wall, Tormund is now the de facto leader of the Wildlings and a reasoned voice in rallying them behind the cause of Jon Snow.
#11 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0
Lord of Blackhaven, bannermen to House Baratheon. He leads the Brotherhood Without Banners, an outlaw fighting group in the Riverlands.
#19 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0
Totals 125 29 33 27 10 20 0 0 6 0

Kills
Cersei plants a kiss on Tyene Sand, poisoning her with the Long Farewell - the same poison used by Ellaria Sand to kill Myrcella Baratheon. (Major Injury of Named Character)
submitted by nyan (approved!)
After the Tyrell forces are defeated and Highgarden is taken by the Lannisters, Olenna accepts the mercy offering of poisoned wine offered by Jaime.

Olenna: "Will there be pain?"
Jaime: "No, I made sure of that."
Olenna: "That's good."
(Major Injury of Named Character)
submitted by nyan (approved!)
Grey Worm slits the throat of a Lannister guard, after sneaking past the walls of Casterly Rock via the sewer tunnels. (Kill of Unnamed Character)
54:29 (+14) Grey Worm :
At the top of the stairs, Grey Worm kills 7 Lannister soldiers, throwing his spear to impale the last one against a door. (Kill of Unnamed Character)
Political Wins
After seizing Highgarden, the defeated Olenna Tyrell sits in her prisoner as a prisoner of Jaime Lannister. (New Follower/Prisoner)
submitted by nyan (approved!)
With his succesful destruction of Yara Greyjoy's fleet and the "gift" of the captured Ellaria and Tyene Sand, Euron wins over Cersei and convinces her to ally with his Ironborn and accept his marriage proposal. (Convincing Argument)
submitted by hkeseyan (approved!)
Euron Greyjoy presents his gift to Cersei - the captured Ellaria and Tyene Sand. (New Follower/Prisoner)
Cersei accepts Euron Greyjoy's proposal of an alliance, appointing him at the head of her navy. (New Follower/Prisoner)
Cersei accepts Euron Greyjoy's proposal of an alliance, appointing him as the head of the navy of the Seven Kindgoms. (New Title)
Cersei casually reveals her night of incest with Jaime in her chambers as she opens the door for one of her handmaidens.

Jaime: "What are you doing? No one can see us like this."
Cersei: "I am Queen of the Seven Kingdoms, I'll do as I please."
(Executive Decision)
submitted by nyan (approved!)
Cersei convinces the Iron Bank against investing in Daenerys Targaryen, and to give her an extension on her loan instead: "From what I gather, she considers herself more of a revolutionary than a monarch. In your experience, how do bankers usually fare with revolutionaries? The Lannisters owe the Iron Bank quite a lot of money, but Lannisters always pay their debts. Do former slaves or Dothraki or dragons?"

Tycho Nestoris: "Your father's daughter, indeed."
(Convincing Argument)
After Jon Snow resigns himself to giving up on an alliance with Daenerys and returning to the North empty-handed, Tyrion convinces him to stay and find a compromise deal, leading him to ask for the dragonglass.

Tyrion: "After a single meeting, it's not a reasonable thing to ask. So, do you have anything reasonable to ask?"
Jon: "What do you mean?"
Tyrion: "Maybe you are a Northern fool. I'm asking if there's something I can do to help you."
(Convincing Argument)
Tyrion convinces Daenerys to give Jon Snow the dragonglass as a gesture of good faith with the North. "Let him mine the Dragonglass. If he's wrong, it's worthless. You didn't even know it was here. It's nothing to you. Give him something by giving him nothing. Take a step toward a more productive relationship with a possible ally." (Convincing Argument)
40:48 (+3) Jon Snow:
Daenerys grants the cache of Dragonglass to Jon: "I will allow you to mine the Dragonglass and forge weapons from it. Any resources or men you need, I will provide for you." (New Weapon)
submitted by nyan (approved!)
Grey Worm and his Unsullied step over the bodies of dead Lannister soldiers atop the walls at Casterly Rock, surveying their victory in taking the castle. (Victorious Battle)
As the Unsullied are busy attacking Casterly Rock, Euron's Iron Fleet ambushes their ships, destroying the Unsullied navy and cutting off any sea-based escape route in the process.

Jaime Lannister to Olenna Tyrell: "They won't be able to hold it (Casterly Rock). Euron Greyjoy's navy burned their ships, we emptied the larders before we left. Eventually, they'll be forced to abandon their position and march all the way across Westeros."
(Victorious Battle)
Jaime's offer to Randyll Tarly to rebel against the Tyrells appears to have been accepted, as the Tarly's ride with the Lannister army on the assault on Highgarden. (Convincing Argument)
Randyll Tarly allies with the Lannisters, taking Jaime Lannister's offer to become Warden of the South and marching with the Lannister army against the Tyrells. (New Follower/Prisoner)
Jaime walks through the courtyards of Highgarden, where the Lannister army has been victorious in seizing the castle. (Victorious Battle)
Jaime walks through the courtyards of Highgarden, where the Lannister army has been victorious in seizing the castle. (Acquire a New Castle/City/Army/Loot)
Jaime is in possession of the Valyrian steel sword, Widow's Wail. "How will you do it? With that sword? That was Joffrey's sword, wasn't it? Not that he ever used it. What did he call it?" Jaime: "Widow's Wail." (New Weapon)
In her dying moments, Olenna Tyrell reveals to Jaime that she was Joffrey's killer.

"I'd hate to die like your son. Clawing at my neck, foam and bile spilling from my mouth, eyes bloodred, skin purple. Must have been horrible for you, as a Kingsguard, as a father. It was horrible enough for me ... You see, I had never seen the poison work before. Tell Cersei. I want her to know it was me."
(Secret Discovery)
submitted by nyan (approved!)
Insults Delivered / Funny Lines
to Varys: "I will return, dear Spider, one last time. I have to die in this strange country... just like you." (Threat)
submitted by hindsight44 (approved!)
on Cersei: "She's a disease, I regret my role in spreading it. You will too." (Witty Insult)
submitted by megan.m.rabuse (approved!)
on Joffrey Baratheon: "He really was a cunt, wasn't he?" (Funny Line)
submitted by megan.m.rabuse (approved!)
to Yara, mocking Theon's reaction during their battle on her ship: "*Ohhh noooo!* What a twat." (Witty Insult)
submitted by hkeseyan (approved!)
to Jaime: "There's nothing like it is there, the love of the people ... but I suppose you wouldn't know". (Witty Insult)
submitted by hkeseyan (approved!)
6:05 (+3) Jon Snow:
Tyrion: "She's much smarter than she lets on."
Jon: "She's starting to let on."
(Funny Line)
Missandei: "You stand in the presence of Daenerys Stormborn of House Targaryen, rightful heir to the Iron Throne, rightful Queen of the Andals and the First Men, Protector of the Seven Kingdoms, the Mother of Dragons, the Khaleesi of the Great Grass Sea, the Unburnt, the Breaker of Chains."
Davos: "This is Jon Snow."
(Funny Line)
12:54 (+3) Jon Snow:
Daenerys Targaryen: "Did you see three dragons flying overhead when you arrived? ... and did you see the Dothraki, all of whom have sworn to kill for me?"
Jon: "They're hard to miss."
(Funny Line)
submitted by nyan (approved!)
Jaime Lannister: "...if you turn on us, they'll cheer to have your severed head mounted on a spike."
Euron: "Or yours. They just like severed heads, really."
(Threat)
to Jaime: "Does she like it gentle, or rough? A finger in the bum? Shh, shh, shh, shh, not now. We'll talk later." (Funny Line)
submitted by jbornstein89 (approved!)
to Ellaria Sand: "Your daughter will die here in this cell, and you will be here watching when she does. You'll be here the rest of your days. If you refuse to eat, we'll force food down your throat. You will live to watch your daughter rot. To watch that beautiful face collapse - to bone and dust. All the while contemplating the choices you've made.

Make sure the guards change the torches every few hours. I don't want her to miss a thing."
(Threat)
to Jon Snow: "I came down here to brood over my failure to predict the Greyjoy attack. You're making it difficult. You look a lot better brooding than I do. You make me feel like I'm failing at brooding over failing." (Funny Line)
"People's minds aren't made for problems that large. White Walkers, the Night King, Army of the Dead. It's almost a relief to confront a comfortable, familiar monster like my sister." (Witty Insult)
Tyrion: "Apparently, it can be turned into weapons that kill white walkers and their foot soldiers. Or stop them. Destroy them. Unsure about the nomenclature." (Funny Line)
Tyrion: "I'd very much like to believe that Jon Snow is wrong. But a wise man once said that you should never believe a thing simply because you want to believe it."
Daenerys: "Which wise man said this?"
Tyrion: "I don't remember."
Daenerys: "Are you trying to present your own statements as ancient wisdom?"
Tyrion: "I would never do that."
To you.
The reason I believe Jon Snow is because he's here.
(Funny Line)
Daenerys catches Tyrion in one of his signature made-up proverbs and calls him out:

Tyrion: "I'd very much like to believe that Jon Snow is wrong. But a wise man once said that you should never believe a thing simply because you want to believe it."
Daenerys: "Which wise man said this?"
Tyrion: "I don't remember."
Daenerys: "Are you trying to present your own statements as ancient wisdom?"
(Funny Line)
submitted by jedjackoway (approved!)
Petyr Baelish: "I know Cersei better than anyone here. If you turn your back on her-"
Sansa: "You don't know Cersei better than anyone here."
Petyr: "I only meant to say-"
Sansa: "That the woman who murdered my mother, father, and brother is dangerous? Thank you for your wise counsel."
(Witty Insult)
Jaime Lannister: "There are always lessons in failures."
Olenna Tyrell: "Yes. You must be very wise by now."
(Witty Insult)
Glasses of Wine Consumed
Cersei downs a shot of Long Farewell antidote after poisoning Tyene Sand with a kiss. (Glass of Wine Consumed)
Jaime takes a drink in Cersei's chambers as we all try to collectively erase the imagery of Euron sticking Cersei with the pointy end. (Glass of Wine Consumed)
Cersei drinks while discussing the Iron Throne's debt payments with Tycho Nestoris, a representative of the Iron Bank. (Glass of Wine Consumed)
Olenna drinks the glass of poisoned wine provided by Jaime, after the Tyrells are defeated at Highgarden.

Olenna: "Will there be pain?"
Jaime: "No, I made sure of that."
Olenna: "That's good."
(Glass of Wine Consumed)
Acts of Intercourse
Jaime gets his trousers dropped as Cersei is feeling extra thirsty after another exhilarating session of dungeon torturing her enemies. (Act of Intercourse)
Cersei throws off the bed sheets to reveal herself in the morning after a night with Jaime. (Act of Intercourse)
Special
3:56 (+3) Jon Snow:
Tyrion Lannister greets Jon on his arrival at Dragonstone: "The Bastard of Winterfell." (Special)
Tyrion Lannister greets Ser Davos on his arrival to Dragonstone: "Ah, the Onion Knight" (Special)
16:54 (+3) Jon Snow:
Davos Seaworth: "He was named King in the North. Not because of his birthright. He has no birthright. He's a damn bastard." (Special)
Cersei: "You've proven yourself the greatest captain of the Fourteen Seas." (Special)
Euron asks Jaime for advice on pleasing Cersei: "Does she like it gentle, or rough? A finger in the bum? Shh, shh, shh, shh, not now. We'll talk later." (Special)
Cersei pours out a glass of wine for her Braavosi visitor, Tycho Nestoris of the Iron Bank. (Special)
Olenna Tyrell: "I'd hate to die like your son. Clawing at my neck, foam and bile spilling from my mouth, eyes blood red, skin purple. Must have been horrible for you, as a Kingsguard, as a father." (Special)