Jorah the Explorah!

8-2, 38 roto pts (#2)
Z-Score: 1.077 (percentile: 85.94%)
Weeks at #1: 5
Categories won: Kills (139), Political Wins (96), Insults Delivered / Funny Lines (102), Glasses of Wine Consumed (85)
Best Week: Episode 4: The Sons of the Harpy (+6.5 roto points)
Team MVP: Tyrion Lannister (picked #3, 121 points, 25.8% of team total)
Longest winstreak: W-6

Roster Stats

Character	Drafted	Total	Kills	Politics	Insults	Wine	Sex	Special
Tyrion Lannister The third of the Lannister children. After losing his trial for the murder of King Joffrey, he has escaped prison and fled King's Landing.	#3	121	3	9	54	55	0	0
Ramsay Bolton The legitimized bastard son of Roose Bolton, now Warden of the North. He is fond of the Bolton tradition of flaying their enemies.	#15	95	22	12	15	25	15	6
Jorah Mormont The exiled head of House Mormont. Jorah was previously one of Daenerys' most trusted advisors, but was banished when his time serving as a spy for Robert Baratheon was revealed to her.	#22	56	36	6	6	5	0	3
Tormund Giantsbane A leader of the Wildlings, he is a trusted lieutenant and second-in-command to Mance Rayder, the King Beyond the Wall.	#27	44	26	15	3	0	0	0
High Sparrow Leader of the Sparrows, a religious movement within the Faith of the Seven.	#63	33	0	24	9	0	0	0
Melisandre A Red Priestess from Asshai, she is a close advisor to Stannis.	#10	29	10	3	3	0	10	3
Grey Worm The leader of the Unsullied - a highly-trained army of slaves freed by Daenerys.	#34	28	28	0	0	0	0	0
Olly A boy working with the Night's Watch. His family's village was massacred in a Wildling attack led by Styr. He is skilled with a bow.	#75	19	10	9	0	0	0	0
Tyene Sand One of Oberyn Martell's bastard children, known as the Sand Snakes.	#58	15	2	0	3	0	10	0
Lancel Lannister A cousin of the Lannister children.	#70	12	0	12	0	0	0	0
Obara Sand One of Prince Oberyn Martell's bastard children, known as the Sand Snakes.	#39	11	2	6	3	0	0	0
Nymeria Sand One of Oberyn Martell's bastards, known as Sand Snakes.	#46	6	0	0	6	0	0	0
Tycho Nestoris A representative of the Iron Bank of Braavos, a powerful bank who holds a large sum of debt from the Iron Throne.	#51	0	0	0	0	0	0	0
Syrio Forel Arya's swordfighting teacher. He is a master swordfighter, and a former First Sword of Braavos. His whereabouts are unknown after he helps Arya escape capture by Lannister soldiers.	#82	0	0	0	0	0	0	0
Totals		469	139	96	102	85	35	12

Roster

charId	Character	Special
17	Tyrion Lannister The third of the Lannister children. After losing his trial for the murder of King Joffrey, he has escaped prison and fled King's Landing.	* +1 point each time he is denied a drink * +1 point whenever he physically gives someone a coin (or other legal tender)
52	Melisandre A Red Priestess from Asshai, she is a close advisor to Stannis.	* +1 point for mentioning that "the night is dark and full of terrors" * +1 each time she mentions a vision she sees in the flames
87	Ramsay Bolton The legitimized bastard son of Roose Bolton, now Warden of the North. He is fond of the Bolton tradition of flaying their enemies.	+1 for each food item he punctures or slices +1 point for every scene featuring an act of torture.
32	Jorah Mormont The exiled head of House Mormont. Jorah was previously one of Daenerys' most trusted advisors, but was banished when his time serving as a spy for Robert Baratheon was revealed to her.	* +1 point when he explains to someone he has Greyscale * +1 point in each scene that Jorah serves as an encyclopedia for Essos culture. * +1 point each time Daenerys convinces him to go on a mission / do something that doesn't involve being anywhere around her (friendzone)
67	Tormund Giantsbane A leader of the Wildlings, he is a trusted lieutenant and second-in-command to Mance Rayder, the King Beyond the Wall.	* every mention of "killing Crows" * every on-screen second he stares into Brienne's soul (rounded up)
38	Grey Worm The leader of the Unsullied - a highly-trained army of slaves freed by Daenerys.	* +1 for every 3-syllable word uttered in the Common Tongue (Westerosi English), not counting proper nouns (Daenerys, Unsullied, etc.) * Receives standard sex points for making it to first base
191	Obara Sand One of Prince Oberyn Martell's bastard children, known as the Sand Snakes.	+1 for invoking the name of Oberyn Martell
189	Nymeria Sand One of Oberyn Martell's bastards, known as Sand Snakes.	+1 for invoking the name of Oberyn Martell
95	Tycho Nestoris A representative of the Iron Bank of Braavos, a powerful bank who holds a large sum of debt from the Iron Throne.
190	Tyene Sand One of Oberyn Martell's bastard children, known as the Sand Snakes.	+1 for invoking the name of Oberyn Martell
192	High Sparrow Leader of the Sparrows, a religious movement within the Faith of the Seven.	1 politics point every time he (or Sparrows under his order) publicly out a named character for their sins
26	Lancel Lannister A cousin of the Lannister children.	+1 politics point when he publicly outs a named character for their sins
132	Olly A boy working with the Night's Watch. His family's village was massacred in a Wildling attack led by Styr. He is skilled with a bow.
73	Syrio Forel Arya's swordfighting teacher. He is a master swordfighter, and a former First Sword of Braavos. His whereabouts are unknown after he helps Arya escape capture by Lannister soldiers.	+1 point every time he references the "God of Death".

Kills

Episode 3: The High Sparrow

13:31 (+10) Ramsay Bolton:

Ramsay tells his father about the flaying of Lord Cerwyn. His body, flayed of all skin, is hung from the walls of Moat Cailin.
Ramsay: "Lord Cerwyn refused to pay. He said the Warden of the North will always be a Stark, and he'd be damned if he kissed a traitor's boot."
Roose Bolton: "You left him no choice."
Ramsay: "I flayed him living, along with his wife and brother. I made his son watch ... The new Lord Cerwyn paid his taxes." (Kill of Named Character)

13:47 (+4) Ramsay Bolton:

The wife and brother of Lady Cerwyn were killed by Ramsay Bolton - their flayed bodies were hung on display from the walls of Moat Cailin. (Kill of Unnamed Character)

Seriously contesting all of Ramsay's kill points. Does it count if it happens off-screen, before the character's first scene in the episode? If so, don't we need to count implied kills whenever a character is in a battle? This is setting a weird precedent, I think. -alicehanners

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2015 Apr 28 nyan and megharr36 like this
Yeah, I think there's a reasonable debate on both sides of this. I think if Ramsay simply *said* he killed these people, it wouldn't count. However in this case, we're shown all three flayed bodies in the scene preceding this one. So the precedent would be that we are shown bodies + details of the kill (enough to confirm the killer).

Some previous examples of this:
S1E2: The Hound credited with a kill after he returns with Mycah's body, though we never see the actual kill.
S1E7: Robert credited with the boar kill after he tells the story about it - we never see the actual kill (though I believe the boar is later shown?).
S2E7: Theon credited with 2 kills after we are shown the two charred bodies of the orphan boys in Winterfell - we never see the actual killing.
S2E8: Jaqen credited with 4 kills of Lannister soldiers at Harrenhal. We never see the actual killing.
S2E8: Dagmer credited with 2 kills after he tells Theon about the farmer and wife that he also killed along with the orphan boys. We actually don't even see bodies in this case.
S2E9: Ser Mandon Moore catches 3 deserters, and Cersei orders all three of them to be executed (and Ilyn Payne heads off to do so). In hindsight this is strong candidate to be rescinded, as there's no actual confirmation.
S4E10: Daenerys is credited for Drogon's kill of the Meereenese villager's daughter. We are shown the charred bones of the girl, but are never shown the actual kill.

I think there's a fair argument to take a hard line and say only explicit on-screen kills count, but that would invalidate most of the above examples. Other lines could be drawn at "must be shown the body" and/or "must get explicit details to determine who did the kill." I'm open to hearing opinions on where the kill cutoff is, but either way it sounds like we'll definitely get a new precedent established for the rulebook, which is always great. -nyan

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2015 Apr 28 moonbaseu92, tim.sheehan, Reaper, alicehanners like this

Episode 4: The Sons of the Harpy

2:10 (+1) Jorah Mormont:

In the middle of the night, Jorah knocks out a fisherman with a haymaker and steals his boat. (Major Injury of Unnamed Character)

38:50 (+2) Obara Sand:

Obara throws her spear through the head of the merchant who smuggled Jaime and Bronn into Dorne. (Kill of Unnamed Character)

46:06 (+12) Grey Worm :

Greyworm fights against the Sons of Harpy mob that ambushes his Unsullied patrol, killing 6 of them.
1. Blunt trauma to the torso with the edge of his shield.
2. Spear slash across the face
3. Stabbed through with spear
4. Slit throat with own short sword after pinning Grey Worm against the wall
5. Spear slash across the back of the neck, after getting pinned against the wall
6. Spear slash across the face (Kill of Unnamed Character)

47:05 (+6) Grey Worm :

Grey Worm kills 3 more Sons of the Harpy as the ambush on his Unsullied patrol continues, suffering a dagger stab to the chest in the process
1. Spear stab while on the ground
2. Impaled onto the blunt end of Grey Worm's spear, which protrudes from the body of the first Son of the Harpy
3. Throat stabbed and slit with the dagger that Grey Worm pulls out of his chest (Kill of Unnamed Character)

47:37 (+8) Grey Worm :

An injured and flailing Grey Worm fends off a mob of Sons of the Harpy that closes in on him, until Barristan Selmy arrives to help fight. He kills 4 more.
1. Spear stab through the stomach
2. Spear stab through the stomach
3. Strike to the stomach as the other half of the mob exits to engage Ser Barristan
4. Stabbed in the background while Barristan fights (Kill of Unnamed Character)

48:38 (+2) Grey Worm :

Grey Worm uses his remaining strength to stab the last Son of the Harpy, right before he is able to slit Barristan Selmy's throat. He then collapses next to the injured Barristan. (Kill of Unnamed Character)

Episode 5: Kill the Boy

52:09 (+2) Jorah Mormont:

Jorah retrieves his sword and cuts down one of the Stone Men that leaps onto his boat. (Kill of Unnamed Character)

52:14 (+2) Jorah Mormont:

Jorah stabs through one of the Stone Men with his sword. (Kill of Unnamed Character)

Episode 6: Unbowed, Unbent, Unbroken

34:09 (+2) Tyene Sand:

Tyene manages to slash Bronn on the arm with her dagger, just before Areo Hotah and the Dornish guards arrive. (Minor Injury of Named Character)

Episode 7: The Gift

8:12 (+2) Ramsay Bolton:

Sansa emerges from her bed, showing the bruises that have been inflicted on her by Ramsay. (Minor Injury of Named Character)

15:42 (+2) Ramsay Bolton:

Ramsay has the old woman who attempted to help Sansa flayed and killed. "Tough old bird. Everyone talks when I start peeling them. But this one, her heart gave out before I even got to her face." (Kill of Unnamed Character)

Isn't that an act of torture? -chadhazellief

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2015 May 26
It would be, but I'm not sure about counting it as it happened off-screen. The kills were counted based on the prior precedent that dead bodies + explanation on how they were killed is good enough to count as a kill. But should off-screen torture count for Ramsay's special? "+1 point for every scene featuring an act of torture."

Submit it and see what others think? -nyan

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2015 May 26 chadhazellief likes this
Yeah, I think there's a reasonable debate on both sides of this. I think if Ramsay simply *said* he killed these people, it wouldn't count. However in this case, we're shown all three flayed bodies in the scene preceding this one. So the precedent would be that we are shown bodies + details of the kill (enough to confirm the killer).

You said that week 3 and he got like 16 points -chadhazellief

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2015 May 27
That precedent still holds for Kills. I'm wondering if it's something that should be extended to the Specials category as well. Some things to run through the thought experiment:

* If Sansa says that she "cried all night", and looks sad (but not crying), would she get a special point?
* If Brienne yells at Podrick "I can't believe you burned down the tent last night!", but we never see the burning (only the charred tent), does it count?

Hmm, as I think of it more... we give Sex points for the scenes where they're just in bed afterwards, too. I think you have a good case that the torture should count. Go ahead and submit them in! -nyan

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2015 May 27

28:30 (+1) Tyrion Lannister:

Tyrion beats a slave trader with the chain from his collar, to prove his worth to the slave trader Yezzan zo Qaggaz. (Major Injury of Unnamed Character)

49:30 (+2) Jorah Mormont:

Jorah elbows Yezzan zo Qaggaz in the nose as he emerges into the fighting pit. (Minor Injury of Named Character)

49:34 (+5) Jorah Mormont:

Jorah enters the fighting pits and knocks out the remaining five fighters in hopes of winning Daenerys' favor. (Major Injury of Unnamed Character)

Episode 8: Hardhome

33:05 (+10) Tormund Giantsbane:

After he is insulted by the Lord of Bones, Tormund steals his club and smashes in the Lord of Bones' skull with it. (Kill of Named Character)

48:00 (+2) Tormund Giantsbane:

Tormund cuts down a wight. (Kill of Unnamed Character)

49:01 (+2) Tormund Giantsbane:

Tormund slices down another wight as Jon makes a run for the main Wildling hut where the dragonglass daggers were left. (Kill of Unnamed Character)

52:21 (+6) Tormund Giantsbane:

Tormund cuts down a wildling, stabs another through the back of the head, and stabs another through the neck. (Kill of Unnamed Character)

53:59 (+4) Tormund Giantsbane:

Tormund headbutts a wight, then throws his sword into the stomach of another that charges at him. (Kill of Unnamed Character)

54:28 (+2) Tormund Giantsbane:

Tormund cuts down a wight as he, Jon Snow, and Edd make a run for the dock. (Kill of Unnamed Character)

Episode 9: The Dance of Dragons

33:57 (+10) Melisandre:

Melisandre burns Shireen Baratheon at the stake after convincing Stannis that her king's blood must be sacrificed. "It will all be over soon, Princess." (Kill of Named Character)

41:22 (+2) Jorah Mormont:

Jorah plunges a dagger into the heart of the long-axe-wielding pit fighter. (Kill of Unnamed Character)

43:39 (+10) Jorah Mormont:

Jorah does a somersault and then stabs his sword through the stomach of the pit fighter, named as the "Meereenese Champion" earlier. (Kill of Named Character)

44:04 (+2) Jorah Mormont:

Jorah throws a spear into the gallery, killing a Son of the Harpy who had been sneaking up behind Daenerys. (Kill of Unnamed Character)

45:13 (+2) Jorah Mormont:

Jorah kills a Son of the Harpy with his dagger as he makes his way over to help protect Daenerys. (Kill of Unnamed Character)

45:39 (+2) Tyrion Lannister:

Tyrion picks a dagger up from the ground and slits the throat of a Son of the Harpy who attempts to attack Missandei. (Kill of Unnamed Character)

46:02 (+2) Jorah Mormont:

Jorah stabs a Son of the Harpy who attempts to ambush Daenerys in the fighting pit escape tunnel. (Kill of Unnamed Character)

47:08 (+4) Jorah Mormont:

Jorah cuts down two enemies as Daenerys' group becomes encircled by the Sons of the Harpy mob. (Kill of Unnamed Character)

49:13 (+2) Jorah Mormont:

Jorah stabs through a Son of the Harpy in the fighting pit. (Kill of Unnamed Character)

Episode 10: Mother's Mercy

16:12 (+2) Ramsay Bolton:

Ramsay stabs through the remaining Baratheon soldier as he mops up the wounded soldiers on the battlefield near Winterfell. "Looks like we're done here." (Kill of Unnamed Character)

16:43 (+2) Ramsay Bolton:

Ramsay stabs the back of a crawling Baratheon soldier as he mops up the battlefield outside Winterfell.
Baratheon soldier: "I surrender! I surrender!"
Ramsay: "And I accept your surrender." (Kill of Unnamed Character)

57:42 (+10) Olly:

Olly deals the fatal stab to Jon Snow in a mutiny. "For the Watch." (Kill of Named Character)

Political Wins

Episode 3: The High Sparrow

24:03 (+3) Olly:

Olly becomes Jon Snow's steward. "Olly is my steward now, as I was Lord Commander Mormont's. I want him to attend my meetings, to learn from men with experience. One day, he might command." (Politics - uncategorized)

27:11 (+3) Olly:

Davos Seaworth asks Olly to recite the Night's Watch oath to Jon Snow - "How does the Night's Watch vow go again? I bet you've got it memorized since you got here." - before interrupting him like an ass. (Politics - uncategorized)

41:36 (+3) Lancel Lannister:

Lancel leads the Sparrows into Littlefinger's brothel, where they discover the High Septon patronizing two prostitutes.
Lancel: "You have profaned our Faith. The Faith of our fathers and forefathers."
High Septon: "I am the High Septon of the-"
Lancel: "You are a sinner. And you shall be punished." (Politics - uncategorized)

41:50 (+3) Lancel Lannister:

Lancel and other the Sparrows parade the High Septon naked through the streets, after catching him with two prostitutes in Littlefinger's brothel. (Politics - uncategorized)

41:50 (+3) High Sparrow:

The Sparrows have the High Septon paraded naked through the streets of King's Landing after they catch him with two prostitutes in Littlefinger's brothel. "Hypocrisy is a boil... lancing a boil is never pleasant, although they could have been more careful with the blade." (Politics - uncategorized)

59:50 (+3) Jorah Mormont:

Jorah captures Tyrion in Volantis. "I'm taking you to the Queen." (Politics - uncategorized)

Episode 4: The Sons of the Harpy

8:39 (+3) High Sparrow:

Cersei meets with the High Sparrow, naming him as the new High Septon and granting him an army - the Faith Militant.
Cersei: "...an army in service to the Gods themselves. And to you, of course, as the chosen representative of the Seven."
High Sparrow: "An honor I've never expected. Or indeed, ever wished for."
Cersei: "Which is why you were chosen." (Politics - uncategorized)

11:37 (+3) High Sparrow:

The Faith Militant captures Loras as a prisoner.
Lancel Lannister: "Ser Loras, of House Tyrell. You have broken the laws of Gods and Men."
Loras Tyrell: "Who do you think you are?"
Lancel Lannister: "Justice." (Politics - uncategorized)

11:41 (+3) Lancel Lannister:

Lancel leads a troop of Sparrows to arrest Loras for his homosexuality.
Lancel: "Ser Loras, of House Tyrell. You have broken the laws of Gods and Men."
Loras Tyrell: "Who do you think you are?"
Lancel: "Justice." (Politics - uncategorized)

11:41 (+3) High Sparrow:

The Sparrows have Ser Loras seized after receiving a tip from Cersei about his homosexuality: "Ser Loras of House Tyrell, you have broken the laws of Gods and Men." (Politics - uncategorized)

37:34 (+3) Obara Sand:

Nymeria whips off a barrel concealing the captain that smuggled Jaime and Bronn into Dorne. He was captured after attempting to sell this information to Obara Sand. (Politics - uncategorized)

37:39 (+3) Obara Sand:

Obara discovers that Jaime has arrived in Dorne after interrogating the ship captain who smuggled him in. "A ship's captain who found me in Planky Town, claiming he had information to sell. He told me he smuggled Jaime Lannister into Dorne." (Politics - uncategorized)

40:55 (+3) Tyrion Lannister:

Tyrion figures out that his captor is Jorah Mormont, and deduces the backstory behind their falling out. "A highborn knight from the North of Westeros, down on his luck in Essos. Dragon epaulets, bear sigil breastplate. You're Jorah Mormont." (Politics - uncategorized)

Episode 5: Kill the Boy

12:42 (+3) Tormund Giantsbane:

Tormund convinces Jon to mobilize the Night's Watch (and Jon himself) to accompany him on the mission to Hardhome, "They need to hear it from you. They need to know the ships they are boarding wot be torched in the middle of the sea. You come with me or I don't go." (Politics - uncategorized)

submitted by moonbaseu92 (approved!)

"Convincing: A character can only "change minds" after they had initially decided in the opposite decision.
Work-in-progress on the definition of "major" decision. Decisions are considered major if:
They mobilize an armed force. Precedents: Ned Stark ordering Beric Dondarrion to arrest the Mountain."
-moonbaseu92

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2015 May 27
hmm that's a fair point on Tormund's part (just to convince Jon). I may argue that Jon also deserves a point for convincing Tormund to go on this mission in the first place. Question though - did any of the Night's Watch actually come along on the journey? Or was it just Jon and a group of Wildlings? -nyan

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2015 May 27
Yes, there were at least 2 Brother's riding off with Jon and Tormund. D Edd among them. -moonbaseu92

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2015 May 28
Added this in... back in E5 when Tormund initially did the convincing. -nyan

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2015 Jun 1

Episode 6: Unbowed, Unbent, Unbroken

21:27 (+3) Tyrion Lannister:

Tyrion convinces the slave trader Malko to spare his life for the time being, instead of slitting his throat and chopping off his cock. "You can't just hand a dried cock to a merchant and expect him to pay for it! He has to know it came from a dwarf. And how could he know unless he sees the dwarf?" (Politics - uncategorized)

23:08 (+3) Jorah Mormont:

Jorah convinces the slave trader Malko to take him to the fighting pits of Meereen instead of the slave city of Volantis.
Jorah: "I killed a Dothraki Bloodrider in single combat."
Malko: "Liar."
Jorah: "It's no lie. His name was Qotho. He was Bloodrider to Khal Drogo. Take me to Slaver's Bay, put a sword in my hand, I'll prove my worth." (Politics - uncategorized)

42:45 (+3) High Sparrow:

The High Sparrow has Queen Margaery arrested for perjuring herself during Loras' inquest. "The Faith is satisfied there is enough evidence to bring a formal trial... for Ser Loras... and Queen Margaery." (Politics - uncategorized)

42:47 (+3) High Sparrow:

The High Sparrow names Margaery Tyrell a sinner for perjuring herself during Loras' inquest. "Bearing false witness before the Gods is a great a sin as any, My Lady. Take her." (Politics - uncategorized)

50:05 (+3) Ramsay Bolton:

Ramsay Bolton and Sansa Stark are wed.
Theon: "Sansa, of the House Stark comes here to be wed. A woman grown, trueborn and noble. She comes to beg the blessings of the Gods. Who comes to claim her?
Ramsay: "Ramsay, of House Bolton." (Politics - uncategorized)

Episode 7: The Gift

10:03 (+3) Ramsay Bolton:

Ramsay discovers Sansa's attempt to call for help after he encounters Reek at the top of the broken tower, prepared to light a signal candle. (Politics - uncategorized)

58:03 (+3) Lancel Lannister:

Lancel confesses his and Cersei's sins to the High Sparrow.
High Sparrow: "A young man (Lancel) came to us not long ago. Broken in body and spirit. He had so much to strip away. So much weighing him down. But piece by piece, he unburdened himself. Let go of vanity, pride, sin. Now his soul is so light, he will float through the Seven Heavens like a bird. Hmm. And he has much to say about you." (Politics - uncategorized)

58:25 (+3) High Sparrow:

The High Sparrow imprisons Cersei based on Lancel Lannister's confessions of her sins. "A young man (Lancel) came to us not long ago. Broken in body and spirit. He had so much to strip away. So much weighing him down. But piece by piece, he unburdened himself. Let go of vanity, pride, sin. Now his soul is so light, he will float through the Seven Heavens like a bird. Hmm. And he has much to say about you." (Politics - uncategorized)

Episode 8: Hardhome

5:58 (+3) Tyrion Lannister:

Tyrion convinces Daenerys to spare Jorah Mormont, and banish him from the city of Meereeen instead. "A ruler who kills those devoted to her is not a ruler who inspires devotion. And you're going to need to inspire devotion, a lot of it, if you're ever going to rule across the Narrow Sea. But you cannot have him by your side when you do." (Politics - uncategorized)

36:14 (+3) Tormund Giantsbane:

Tormund convinces the Wildlings to not kill Jon Snow for killing Mance. "None of you saw Mance die. I did. The southern king who broke our army, Stannis, wanted to burn him alive to send us a message. Jon Snow defied that cunt's orders. His arrow was mercy." (Politics - uncategorized)

38:45 (+3) Tormund Giantsbane:

Tormund convinces the Wildlings to accept Jon Snow's invitation and depart Hardhome to head south of the Wall.
Karsi: "I'll never trust a man in black. But I trust you, Tormund. If you say this is the way, we're with you."
Tormund: "This is the way." (Politics - uncategorized)

39:07 (+6) Tormund Giantsbane:

Karsi and the Giant Wun Weg Wun Dar Wun agree to follow Tormund south of the Wall. (Politics - uncategorized)

Episode 9: The Dance of Dragons

3:01 (+3) Ramsay Bolton:

Ramsay and his band of "twenty men" sneak into Stannis Baratheon's camp in the middle of the night and set fire to the Baratheon food and war supplies.
Ser Davos: "They were in and out before anyone spotted them. Burnt our food stores to the ground, all our siege weapons destroyed."
(Politics - uncategorized)

31:42 (+3) Melisandre:

Melisandre has convinced Stannis Baratheon to offer up his daughter Shireen for a sacrifice of her "king's blood". (Politics - uncategorized)

Episode 10: Mother's Mercy

16:12 (+3) Ramsay Bolton:

Ramsay Bolton handily defeats the broken and dispirited forces of Stannis Baratheon in the battle outside Winterfell. "Looks like we're done here." (Politics - uncategorized)

47:15 (+3) High Sparrow:

The High Sparrow publicly announces the sins of Cersei Lannister to the people of King's Landing. "She has committed the acts of falsehood and fornication. She has confessed her sins and begged for forgiveness... She comes before you with a solemn heart, shorn of secrets, naked before the eyes of gods and men, to make her walk of atonement." (Politics - uncategorized)

57:42 (+3) Olly:

Olly betrays Jon Snow, telling him of news about his uncle Benjen in order to lead him to the band of mutineers. (Politics - uncategorized)

Insults Delivered / Funny Lines

Episode 1: The Wars to Come

14:19 (+3) Tyrion Lannister:

"Are you a lord if you kill your father? I don't imagine they revoke your nobility for killing a whore, it must happen all the time." (Funny Line)

35:00 (+3) Tyrion Lannister:

Varys: "There are faster ways to kill yourself."
Tyrion: "Not for a coward." (Funny Line)

37:31 (+3) Tyrion Lannister:

Varys: "You have a choice, my friend. You can stay here at Illyrio's palace and drink yourself to death or you can ride with me to Meereen, meet Daenerys Targaryen and decide if the world is worth fighting for."
Tyrion: "Can I drink myself to death on the road to Meereen?" (Funny Line)

Episode 2: The House of Black and White

27:30 (+3) Tyrion Lannister:

Varys: "Cersei has offered a lordship to the man who brings her your head."
Tyrion: "She ought to offer her cunt. Best part of her for the best part of me." (Witty Insult)

27:43 (+3) Tyrion Lannister:

Varys: "Are we really going to spend the entire road to Volantis talking about the futility of everything?"
Tyrion: "You're right, no point." (Funny Line)

Episode 3: The High Sparrow

54:54 (+3) Tyrion Lannister:

Brothel bouncer: "It's good luck to rub a dwarf's head."
Tyrion: "It's even better luck to suck a dwarf's cock."
*flustered Varys* (Funny Line)

submitted by wpearsal (approved!)

56:05 (+3) Tyrion Lannister:

to Varys: "I need to talk to someone with hair." (Witty Insult)

Episode 4: The Sons of the Harpy

21:35 (+3) Melisandre:

"You know nothing, Jon Snow." (Witty Insult)

39:08 (+3) Tyrion Lannister:

"MRPPHM MRPPPHM MPRMPRPHM MPRPHPM MPRPRHPHMMM MMHRRM MPHRRM... thank you." (Funny Line)

39:49 (+3) Jorah Mormont:

Tyrion: "I can't sleep without wine."
Jorah: "Then stay awake." (Funny Line)

submitted by wpearsal (approved!)

Episode 5: Kill the Boy

18:47 (+3) Ramsay Bolton:

Myranda: "I saw you staring at her (Sansa)."
Ramsay: "I'm going to marry her. That will involve looking at her from time to time." (Funny Line)

19:16 (+3) Ramsay Bolton:

Miranda: "Do you think she's pretty?"
Ramsay: "Of course I do. I'm not blind. " (Funny Line)

submitted by moonbaseu92 (approved!)

29:16 (+3) Ramsay Bolton:

about Theon: "He's not Ironborn anymore. Not Theon Greyjoy anymore. He's a new man... a new person, anyway." (Witty Insult)

32:19 (+3) Ramsay Bolton:

to Roose Bolton: "How can you be sure... that she's pregnant? I mean... [spacing gesture indicate Fat Walda's size] ...how can you tell?" (Witty Insult)

47:40 (+3) Tyrion Lannister:

to Jorah Mormont: "Long, sullen silences and the occasional punch in the face. The Mormont way." (Witty Insult)

Episode 6: Unbowed, Unbent, Unbroken

21:27 (+3) Tyrion Lannister:

Tyrion: "You can't just hand a dried cock to a merchant and expect him to pay for it! He has to know it came from a dwarf. And how could he know unless he sees the dwarf?"
Slave trader: "It will be a dwarf-sized cock."
Tyrion: "Guess again." (Funny Line)

52:30 (+3) Ramsay Bolton:

Ramsay reminds Sansa to remove her clothes: "Do I need to ask a second time? I hate asking a second time." (Threat)

Episode 7: The Gift

33:42 (+3) High Sparrow:

"... the holy text, the Seven-Pointed Star. If you don't have one in your library, I'll give you my own." (Witty Insult)

34:49 (+3) High Sparrow:

to Olenna Tyrell: "A lifetime of wealth and power has left you blind in one eye. You are the few, we are the many. And when the many stop fearing the few..." (Threat)

40:19 (+3) Nymeria Sand:

Bronn: "?...I've tasted the Dornishman's wife. ?"
Tyene Sand: *claps* "...he's got a good voice."
Nymeria: "We're lucky he's a singer. If he were a fighter, we might have been in trouble." (Witty Insult)

40:27 (+3) Obara Sand:

Bronn: "It's against my code to hurt a woman.
Obara: "It's amazing how many men we beat seem to have this code." (Witty Insult)

57:01 (+3) High Sparrow:

to Cersei: "The Tyrells' finery will be stripped away. Their lies knocked down. Their true hearts laid bare for all to see. And so it will be for all of us. High and low alike. What will we find when we strip away your finery?" (Threat)

Bit of a stretch, I think. Is it really a threat? -alicehanners

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2015 May 26
Ooh, this wasn't intimidating enough for you? I thought it was one of the more solid threats that have been scored - he's basically laying out that, just like she's done with the Tyrells, the Faith is going to open up all the skeletons in her closet and lay them out for the world to see. -nyan

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2015 May 26
"And so it will be for all of us. High and low alike." is what makes this not a threat for me. Is he threatening everyone in the world?

It's more of a "You don't have anything to hide, do you?" question. What is he threatening? -alicehanners

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2015 May 27
I think the "and so it will be for all of us" line translates to "and nobody is going to be safe." It seems more like a threat than a question - he doesn't pause to wait for an answer from Cersei, and instead launches directly into his story behind Lancel. -nyan

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2015 May 27

Episode 8: Hardhome

2:24 (+3) Tyrion Lannister:

"I killed my mother... on the day I was born. I killed my father, Tywin Lannister, with a bolt to the heart. I am the greatest Lannister killer of all time." (Funny Line)

20:27 (+3) Tyrion Lannister:

"Someday, if you decide not to execute me, I'll tell you all about why I killed my father. And on that day, should it ever come, we'll need more wine than this." (Funny Line)

21:25 (+3) Tyrion Lannister:

"My own sister married someone she loathed as well, though not by choice and certainly not for the greater good, Gods forbid." (Witty Insult)

36:50 (+3) Tormund Giantsbane:

on Jon Snow: "He's prettier than both my daughters, but he knows how to fight." (Witty Insult)

Episode 9: The Dance of Dragons

15:02 (+3) Nymeria Sand:

Nymeria taunts her half-sister Tyene as she dominates her in the slapping game 17 times in a row.
"Why do we play? I'm better than you. I'll always... *slap* ...be better than you. Have I ever missed? Once? *slap* I don't think I have, I can't *slap* recall. You must love humiliation. *slap* Or pain. *slap* Which do you love most, humiliation or *slap* ...pain? That one hurt, didn't it? *slap*" (Witty Insult)

38:21 (+3) Tyrion Lannister:

Hizdahr zo Loraq: "You don't approve (of the fighting pits)?"
Tyrion: "There's always been more than enough death in the world for my taste. I can do without it in my leisure time." (Funny Line)

38:56 (+3) Tyrion Lannister:

Hizdahr zo Loraq, as the dead pit fighter is dragged away: "That... is a vital part of the great city of Meereen, which existed long before you or I, and will remain standing long after we have returned to the dirt."
Tyrion: "My father would have liked you." (Witty Insult)

39:36 (+3) Tyrion Lannister:

to Hizdahr zo Loraq: "Well said. You're an eloquent man. Doesn't mean you're wrong. In my experience, eloquent men are right every bit as often as imbeciles." (Witty Insult)

Episode 10: Mother's Mercy

26:32 (+3) Tyene Sand:

to Bronn: "You want a good girl, but you need the bad pussy." (Funny Line)

32:06 (+3) Tyrion Lannister:

to Missandei: "Apologies. My Valyrian is a bit nostril." (Funny Line)

33:05 (+3) Jorah Mormont:

Tyrion: "Fine, fine. I suppose he can join us. Just as long as he promises not to kill me in my sleep."
Jorah: "If I ever kill you, your eyes will be wide open." (Threat)

33:36 (+3) Tyrion Lannister:

Daario: "So mainly you talk."
Tyrion: "And drink. I've survived so far." (Witty Insult)

Glasses of Wine Consumed

Episode 1: The Wars to Come

13:59 (+15) Tyrion Lannister:

Tyrion downs 3 cups of wine after getting out of that fucking crate, before puking over all the rugs in Ilyrio's palace. (Glass of Wine Consumed)

15:04 (+5) Tyrion Lannister:

After vomiting his previous three drinks onto the floor of Ilyrio's palace, Tyrion refills and goes for another. Boot 'n rally! (Glass of Wine Consumed)

35:01 (+10) Tyrion Lannister:

Tyrion drinks away his misery with two glasses of wine on the balcony of Ilyrio's palace. (Glass of Wine Consumed)

Episode 2: The House of Black and White

27:20 (+5) Tyrion Lannister:

Tyrion drinks a glass of wine inside that fucking box. (Glass of Wine Consumed)

Episode 3: The High Sparrow

52:53 (+5) Tyrion Lannister:

Tyrion drinks from a flask while walking through a market in Volantis. (Glass of Wine Consumed)

55:49 (+5) Tyrion Lannister:

Tyrion drinks at the whorehouse in Volantis. (Glass of Wine Consumed)

55:55 (+5) Jorah Mormont:

Jorah drinks away his sorrows as he can't even get within the friendzone of the Daenerys cosplayer in Volantis. (Glass of Wine Consumed)

Episode 5: Kill the Boy

25:47 (+5) Ramsay Bolton:

Ramsay drinks while talking with Reek. (Glass of Wine Consumed)

28:09 (+5) Ramsay Bolton:

Ramsay drinks after proposing a toast to Sansa Stark. "My lady, we are all a family, we Northerners. Our blood ties go back thousands of years. So I'd like to drink to our wedding. May our happiness spread from Moat Cailin to the Last Hearth." (Glass of Wine Consumed)

32:07 (+5) Ramsay Bolton:

Ramsay drinks again from his refilled cup, after Roose Bolton announces that Fat Walda Frey is pregnant. (Glass of Wine Consumed)

33:13 (+5) Ramsay Bolton:

Ramsay drinks while discussing the Bolton line of succession with his father Roose Bolton. (Glass of Wine Consumed)

33:38 (+5) Ramsay Bolton:

Ramsay refills his cup as Roose Bolton tells him the story of her mother. (Glass of Wine Consumed)

Episode 8: Hardhome

20:13 (+5) Tyrion Lannister:

drinks while speaking with Daenerys in her chambers. (Glass of Wine Consumed)

22:45 (+5) Tyrion Lannister:

Tyrion drinks his refilled cup while speaking with Daenerys in her chambers. (Glass of Wine Consumed)

Acts of Intercourse

Episode 4: The Sons of the Harpy

19:50 (+10) Melisandre:

Melisandre visits the Lord Commander's chambers and undresses herself, in an attempt to woo Jon Snow. (Non-sexual Nude Scene)

Episode 5: Kill the Boy

20:49 (+10) Ramsay Bolton:

Ramsay takes Myranda from behind after their lover's quarrel over Ramsay's marriage to Sansa Stark. (Act of Intercourse)

Episode 6: Unbowed, Unbent, Unbroken

53:44 (+5) Ramsay Bolton:

Ramsay rapes Sansa Stark on their wedding night. "Reek... I told you to watch. You've known Sansa since she was a girl. Now watch her become a woman." (Act of Intercourse)

Episode 7: The Gift

41:14 (+10) Tyene Sand:

Tyene strips down to toy with Bronn as he suffers from the effects of her poisoned dagger. (Non-sexual Nude Scene)

Special

Episode 5: Kill the Boy

50:12 (+3) Jorah Mormont:

Jorah finishes Tyrion's recital of a poem describing the Doom of Valyria. "... a city of a thousand years, and all that men had learned; The Doom consumed it all alike, and neither of them turned." (Special)

Episode 6: Unbowed, Unbent, Unbroken

52:10 (+3) Ramsay Bolton:

Ramsay makes Reek stay in the bedchamber to watch him rape Sansa. "Oh, no, no, no. You stay here, Reek. You watch." (Special)

53:03 (+3) Ramsay Bolton:

Ramsay tortures Sansa Stark on their wedding night by raping her with Reek (Theon Greyjoy) watching. "Reek... I told you to watch. You've known Sansa since she was a girl. Not watch her become a woman." (Special)

Ramsay gets +1 for every scene of torture, why are these both +3? It was just 1 scene. -alicehanners

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2015 May 26
NM, I see that they're all +1/+3. -alicehanners

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2015 May 26
Yeah, the wording there is a little confusing as the +1's are from before category "weights" were introduced. Internally they're recorded as +1 Special Point, x3 Special Multiplier (but it was an x1 or x2 multiplier in older leagues). After this season I'll change all the "+1" text to eliminate confusion, and also try to give a better breakdown of how the points summed up (lots of confusion about how they sex points are counted up, for example). -nyan

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2015 May 26

Episode 9: The Dance of Dragons

33:04 (+3) Melisandre:

"Hear us now, my Lord. For you, we offer up this girl, that you may cleanse her with your fire and that its light may lead our way. Accept this token of our faith, my Lord, and lead us from the darkness. Lord of Light, show us the way. Lord of Light, protect us. For the night is dark and full of terrors." (Special)

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